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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hey TSR! Hope you are all well



    I do not have a question to ask today but what I do have is sincere advice to give on relationship as I have seen these floating around and some of the problems/questions are quite similar to what I had experienced.

    So what are you waiting for? Grab your popcorn and coffee or what have you and enjoy my life story. (This is going to be extremely long so be warned!)

    Alright. it starts off on the eve of April 2015 where I have an arranged marriage with my now ex. At first it was all hunky-dory and a 'perfect' marriage. This was when I was 18 years old. He didnt really ask for much and we never used to see each other much as I was in London and he was from Preston/Manchester, however we did used to talk to each other daily. It was clear that the chemistry was working. Let me also let you know that he had epilepsy which meant he was constantly in and out of hospital and I was always worried about him having fit as these can occur at any time.

    Then in May 2016 he bought me a house for both of us to stay in together as well as his baby sister (my sis-in law)- His father passed away just after we tied the knot and his mother passed away in December 2016.

    Little was I aware that I would be a victim of domestic abuse in this particular house. So whenever he wanted to come over to our house he used to come over and we used to make our way to our house from my mums house. Note this was an exhausting journey to make back and from. Because the distance between my mums house and my new house was around a 2 hours drive. I never used to mind the drive as it was always fun. But my other sis in law who was 17 at the time warned me against her brother that he was cheating behind my back. I refused to believe it at first considering he was always there when I required him. After she told me this everything immediately changed. It was a rollercoaster that I will never wish upon any individual.

    To undercover all his dirty mess I found out he had wife 1 and had a child with her this was not pointed out to me or my father at the initial proposal stage. The lady went back home he lost contact and she was never seen again. Then I found out that he had a second wife and he divorced her they had no children together. The third wife this is where it gets interesting, this is the lady that he was cheating on with me behind my back. I remember he came to me and he said it himself that she keeps seducing him and what have you. (I forgave him being really naïve bearing in mind I was 19 at this time). He said he would never do it again. Alarms bells were constantly ringing, when he wasn’t home by a specified time I knew exactly where he was but as usual I remained calm and collected there was no use in being angry after all I was the main reason he was cheating in the first place. I am asexual I told him this in our first meeting however he didn’t believe me for some reason and he thought I would get sexual with him but that went horroundensly wrong like one might expect. However I managed to forgive him on numerous occasions and move on like normal couples would. He wouldn’t go to the other wife house (wife 3) house for at least 6 months as he was always home on time. He was everything to me even throughout the cheating. The last straw occurred when he went to hers again this was the fifth and last time. Anyways we broke up in June and in August I got a new marriage proposal. The thing is my sister in laws-sister in law( Me and her are really close) went and stupidly told my ex that I had moved on and he’s a waste of space because he hadn’t moved on yet. Until today I am in disagreement with this, he had me on his mind 247 but me being such a coward moved on thinking all is going to be okay. He initially refused to give me his consent for divorce but I forced him too. At the time it was all too much for me.

    My ex was depressed and had a lot of seizure’s and all. To top it off I received a phone call last Tuesday to say he’s dead. And instantly I knew I was to blame. Whilst I write this tears are seeping out at 0. 5 milliseconds but it’s too late. Just for info purposes he killed himself off a cliff. What’s left of him and me are the memories that we shared together, good and bad.

    So ladies and gents, don’t hesitate to always take the easy route like me, you might move on but the man will always be contingent on you returning back. And that’s exactly what didn’t occur in my relationship.

    I hope you all learn the true meaning of taking a piece of heart because this was not easy to write and two this is always going to remain with me for the rest of my life. Life is not an easy journey there’s lots to learn and lots to love. Always think twice when you are in a committed relationship and always love teacher regardless of the mistake that is made. Always make decisions wisely and not rash like I did.

    In the words of my beautiful ex, I will always love you forever, even if we be miles apart.

    RIP.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    [QUOTE=Anonymous;74423538]

    Hey TSR! Hope you are all well



    I do not have a question to ask today but what I do have is sincere advice to give on relationship as I have seen these floating around and some of the problems/questions are quite similar to what I had experienced.

    So what are you waiting for? Grab your popcorn and coffee or what have you and enjoy my life story. (This is going to be extremely long so be warned!)

    Alright. it starts off on the eve of April 2015 where I have an arranged marriage with my now ex. At first it was all hunky-dory and a 'perfect' marriage. This was when I was 18 years old. He didnt really ask for much and we never used to see each other much as I was in London and he was from Preston/Manchester, however we did used to talk to each other daily. It was clear that the chemistry was working. Let me also let you know that he had epilepsy which meant he was constantly in and out of hospital and I was always worried about him having fit as these can occur at any time.

    Then in May 2016 he bought me a house for both of us to stay in together as well as his baby sister (my sis-in law)- His father passed away just after we tied the knot and his mother passed away in December 2016.

    Little was I aware that I would be a victim of domestic abuse in this particular house. So whenever he wanted to come over to our house he used to come over and we used to make our way to our house from my mums house. Note this was an exhausting journey to make back and from. Because the distance between my mums house and my new house was around a 2 hours drive. I never used to mind the drive as it was always fun. But my other sis in law who was 17 at the time warned me against her brother that he was cheating behind my back. I refused to believe it at first considering he was always there when I required him. After she told me this everything immediately changed. It was a rollercoaster that I will never wish upon any individual.

    To undercover all his dirty mess I found out he had wife 1 and had a child with her this was not pointed out to me or my father at the initial proposal stage. The lady went back home he lost contact and she was never seen again. Then I found out that he had a second wife and he divorced her they had no children together. The third wife this is where it gets interesting, this is the lady that he was cheating on with me behind my back. I remember he came to me and he said it himself that she keeps seducing him and what have you. (I forgave him being really naive bearing in mind I was 19 at this time). He said he would never do it again. Alarms bells were constantly ringing, when he wasn’t home by a specified time I knew exactly where he was but as usual I remained calm and collected there was no use in being angry after all I was the main reason he was cheating in the first place. However I managed to forgive him on numerous occasions and move on like normal couples would. He wouldn’t go to the other wife house (wife 3) house for at least 6 months as he was always home on time.

    He was everything to me even throughout the cheating. The last straw occurred when he went to hers again this was the fifth and last time. Anyways we broke up in June and in August I got a new marriage proposal. The thing is my sister in laws-sister in law( Me and her are really close) went and stupidly told my ex that I had moved on and he’s a waste of space because he hadn’t moved on yet. Until today I am in disagreement with this, he had me on his mind 247 but me being such a coward moved on thinking all is going to be okay. He initially refused to give me his consent for divorce but I forced him too. At the time it was all too much for me.

    My ex was depressed and had a lot of seizure’s and all. To top it off I received a phone call last Tuesday to say he’s dead. And instantly I knew I was to blame. Whilst I write this tears are seeping out at 0. 5 milliseconds but it’s too late. Just for info purposes he killed himself off a cliff. What’s left of him and me are the memories that we shared together, good and bad.

    So ladies and gents, don’t hesitate to always take the easy route like me, you might move on but the man will always be contingent on you returning back. And that’s exactly what didn’t occur in my relationship.

    I hope you all learn the true meaning of taking a piece of heart because this was not easy to write and two this is always going to remain with me for the rest of my life. Life is not an easy journey there’s lots to learn and lots to love. Always think twice when you are in a committed relationship and always love teacher regardless of the mistake that is made. Always make decisions wisely and not rash like I did.

    In the words of my beautiful ex, I will always love you forever, even if we be miles apart.

    RIP.
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