I'm 17 and i'm depressed. To put it short..
Right now i'm feeling low and i'm struggling to cope
I've been through heart surgery in 2015 and physically im over the moon but mentally its a different story (negativity/low feelings/low self esteem)
I've very little family. I only have a younger brother who's 15 and is practically my only friend, we go out sometimes..but he's just got a girlfriend and he's starting to spend more time with her now..and well im happy for him but i just feel more lonely inside..
Tbh the last time i had a proper relationship was 3 YEARS AGO and right now i cant find anyone (im even trying dating apps..no luck)
I like my appearence generally (my face, my weight etc is great) but my stomach/chest has big long and thick scars from the surgery i had a few years ago and to say it looks ugly is an understatement, i wouldnt do anything that exposes my chest area b/c of you know what...confidence issues etc
All i do is search for jobs, go on long long walks, watch football and work on computers (and college) in my spare time but i feel more like a 57 year old than 17...i dont drink or smoke because im om 'warfarin' and my parents always say to me 'when i was ur age i didnt sit around the house etc we were in discos and pubs, why dont u get urself a girlfriend' and all this..and it makes me re-evaluate myself and i start to feel like ****.
I feel empty inside. I feel as if im wasting my time. I feel like a failure.
Sorry if this doesnt make much sense but its on my mind right now and i had to get it out somewhere...
What do you think?