Law personal statement!

Hi, any thoughts on my personal statement final draft would be much appreciated!! Not sure if the structure and paragraphing needs work

Applying to Warwick, Exeter, Birmingham and maybe Reading/Cardiff
Predicted grades A*AA

Thanks<3

Volunteering with Citizens Advice has shown me the importance of law. Witnessing the extent of social issues has exposed me to the reality of injustice and sparked my interest in the way society functions. This prompted me to study a subject which explores this in greater depth. Law appeals to me because of its breadth and relevance to every aspect of society. The prospect of grappling with complex issues is also exciting as I am motivated by challenge.
Since April of last year, I have volunteered on a weekly basis with my local Citizens Advice Bureau (CAB). I also arranged to spend a week on placement with the CAB. Being involved with the charity has been a highlight of my time in sixth form, and I am training to become an adviser. Shadowing CAB solicitors has provided me with an insight into legal issues. I listened to a client who had claimed asylum and been given refugee status but was struggling with housing. She had been living in temporary accommodation provided by the council, but this was terminated when she was given asylum support. She couldn’t afford housing, and while still seeking asylum she was not eligible to open a UK bank account. The client was in an extremely insecure and vulnerable position, faced with the likely possibility of homelessness and had limited understanding of her options. I found this case particularly interesting as it gave me a clearer picture of the experience of immigrants when they enter our country. It led me to research current UK legal systems which support these individuals, provoking me to question whether these are adequate for the changing needs of society. I look forward to the opportunity to learn about Refugee and Asylum law at university.
Studying genetics in A level biology was fascinating and I enjoyed considering ethics in this unit. My interest in this topic inspired me to undertake a MOOC in bioethics. The course syllabus asked questions such as ‘Should we use genetic enhancements to increase our intelligence?’ and ‘Should selling embryos be legal?’ For the first time, I had the opportunity to apply legal reasoning to ethical questions of genetics.
I currently work at the Bristol and Avon Law Centre on reception. This has also confirmed my interest in law. The law centre seeks to achieve justice by providing legal aid and I enjoy contributing to such an inspiring charity. Through interacting with clients with issues ranging from benefits to discrimination, I have been able recognise the breadth of legal issues. It has taught me how legal advice can benefit individuals in challenging circumstances.
Last August I secured a work experience placement at Bath Magistrates Court. I was given an enriching timetable which included shadowing ushers, talking to magistrates and listening to hearings. The week enhanced my knowledge of how legal proceedings operate. It led me to consider a possible career in law. I was also inspired by Judge Horton when I attended the Judicial Awareness day at Bristol University, who spoke about the impact and value that justice has on people’s lives.
Through positions of responsibility, I have been able to develop my leadership skills. I am a Sixth Form Ambassador and prefect which has provided me with opportunities to communicate and effectively manage my time. An example of this is starting a debate club for younger students. I have been able to demonstrate organisational skills and show initiative. I have also had a part-time job as a gymnastics coach for 4 years. Through coaching, I have developed my teaching and communication skills. Passing my Level 1 Coaching Qualification has given me more responsibility, and it is the highest recognisable qualification I can gain at my age. I am proud of this achievement.
Law at university is a very exciting prospect for me. I am intrigued to learn about and question its impact on society. I am confident that I have the motivation and ability to find this course extremely rewarding.

Hi, any thoughts on my personal statement final draft would be much appreciated!! Not sure if the structure and paragraphing needs work

Applying to Warwick, Exeter, Birmingham and maybe Reading/Cardiff
Predicted grades A*AA

Thanks<3.