How to deal with arguments with a partner

I personally am an extremely insecure Individual I always feel like my boyfriend is going to leave me and I feel so ugly compared to what he probably could get I cry a lot bevause I’m so insecure.
Also we used to Argue almost everyday but now it’s a lot less however it does make me so upset and after most arguments I do self harm a lot not because of nasty comments made because that doesn’t happen usually but just because I feel like he will leave me bevause he is fed up.
I guess the problem is i worry to be alone and seeing him with someone else
Someone please tell me they have the same or advice pls
Be nice :smile:

Reply 1

del1rious

This doesn’t sound like a very loving relationship and I think you should question what you are getting out of it. A loving partner should make you feel safe and secure

Reply 2

Rum Ham

Having to ask for help on how to deal with arguments with your partner should be ringing off huge alarm bells for you.

The relationship doesn't sound healthy but your coping mechanisms such as self harming and then your low self esteem and worry that he will leave, sound even more dangerous. It sounds like you have anxiety issues in general and I would advise working on that - be it by going to the doctor or trying some self help.

As for the relationship, every couple argues but the arguments shouldn't be that frequent or so serious that they cause doubt in your relationship and even worse, cause you to self harm. I know you are scared of being alone or seeing him with someone else but relationships are built on trust and stability and by the sounds of it, there's not much in this relationship.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 3

Adz2042

If you're in a relationship and self-harming or worrying that he'll leave you, it's not good that you're still with him.

Ditch him, find someone that will love you, take care of you and make you feel safe & secure.

Also, seek help from your parents / family friends or a teacher at school in regards to the self-harming.

x

Stop arguing.

What are the arguments usually about? If it's him along his temper or being paranoid over small things, there's probably something up with him and you need to get him to be honest. Otherwise suggest to him that you take a break, sometimes people need time apart to realise they need each other and when you get back together it'll be like you just got together and there'll be a spark again