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- Thread Starter
Last edited by lilbob97; 09-11-2017 at 14:12.
- 09-11-2017 01:53
- 09-11-2017 03:03
This sounds slightly familiar to me, me and my boyfriend were arguing a lot and we tried to sort the problems and make it up but it got to the point where we were having major arguments more than once a day. We realised that it couldn't work and mutually agreed we should break up as although we still had feelings for eachother, it just wasn't right. During the breakup we'd mentioned there was a possibility of us being back together which my boyfriend seemed eager for that to happen.
He started to text me regularly and act as if we were together. The next day he called me in tears saying he wanted to get back together.
It sounds like your boyfriend thought he didn't need you but when you broke up he realised he still has strong feelings for you, something which can often happen, and it sounds like if you have him the chance he would now be willing to put in the effort as after this ordeal he'll realise the consequences of not doing so.
Personally in my situation it took me a week or so to realise I also wanted to be back with my boyfriend. So for now I suggest you stay out of contact with him and wait for a bit until you're certain whether you'd like to seperate or not. It takes time for your mind to decide what it wants to do. Consider the problems in your relationship and think about whether they will still be there if you get back with your boyfriend
If you do not want to be with him that's completely fine, don't let his feelings hold you back from doing what's best for you.
Hope this helps
- 09-11-2017 04:52
I think you were right to end the relationship. You don't mention your age but I am guessing either you didn't go to uni or are younger than your ex. or perhaps he's just attending a different uni. Starting uni and maintaining a LDR isn't easy for any couple. Going off to uni has put him in a different life stage than you are right now. It isn't anything personal it is he's experiencing so many new and different things right now. And this time of year especially there is a lot of course work and essays due. I think he genuinely likes/loves you and that is why he is continuing to contact you but if you're feeling like he's not able (or willing) to contact you as much as you need then yes, it is best to stop the relationship at least for now. Your needs are important in the relationship too. I would suggest you kindly ask you not to contact you until the holidays. Will he be returning home (assuming that is the town you live in) for the holidays? If so, ask him not to contact you til then. That will give you both time away. Then if you are both willing you can consider seeing him during the holidays and you two can meet and chat and hopefully find a friendship. Then you can reevaluate whether resuming a relationship in the future is worth seeking out. For now, I agree, you both need a break.
- Thread Starter
- 09-11-2017 14:14
Thank you both of the replies make perfect sense but I’m not sure what I want I wanted to break up with him as I wasn’t happy but now I do miss him a little but I think that will fade with time, I shall just focus on myself and making myself happy and see how it folds out. Thankyou for the advice