Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Muslim parents refuse to let me move away for uni Watch

    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by liquidconfidence)
    *Over the years, the intellectual quality of this forum has declined.

    You're welcome
    there was literally nothing wrong with what they said.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by liquidconfidence)
    But you chose to respond anyway.. with nonsense. The comments were well-reasoned, someone's triggered by the fact that I decided to actually be real instead of pretending OP was some oppressed, abused, oppressed victim. Try going to Syria or North Korea, or any other country where women and citizens in general are mistreated.
    See, this was what I meant by poorly-reasoned comments. You seem to be suggesting that if Group A is suffering more than Person B, then Person B has no right to voice their suffering on a public internet forum. The conclusion does not follow from the premises. Do those with a broken finger have no right to express their suffering simply because there are people out there with two broken fingers?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by liquidconfidence)
    That's not what I said. Read before you respond next time.

    My point is the fact that she specifically applied to universities outside London (despite the fact that there are high-ranking unis within the city) is immature because she never really made an informed choice did she?

    It's like someone who lives in Oxford saying: 'oh I never applied for any unis in Oxford because my Muslim parents are so strict and I'm dissatisfied with my life and want independence'.

    Duh.
    I applied to one university in London but I don't particularly want to go there. sorry for not making that more clear. I just mean most of the unis I applied to
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by liquidconfidence)
    *Over the years, the intellectual quality of this forum has declined.

    You're welcome
    You can restructure a sentence in English. What of it? Find me a single linguist in the entire world who would find either sentence formulation objectionable.
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by adamantacademic)
    The woman's testimony found in Surah Nisa was ordained due to the fact at that time women weren't involved with dealings, they could get cheated by men in the industry. In fact it was commonplace for women to appoint financial managers to assist them with their assets (e.g inheritance), for instance Khadijah herself appointed the Prophet Muhammed as a Merchant to see to her trades. Thus the Qur'an advises women to bring another female friend/relative with them to work together for a resolution.
    But obviously the context is different today and I'm of no doubt Financial lecturers/analysts/researchers are professions held by many women today.
    Really:
    (Original post by https://quran.com/2/282)
    And bring to witness two witnesses from among your men. And if there are not two men [available], then a man and two women from those whom you accept as witnesses - so that if one of the women errs, then the other can remind her.
    And as you mentioned inheritance, there's another blatantly sexist rule.

    With regards to your statement on the Niqaab please bring a statistic or something....
    I asked a question. Care to answer it?
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lychee627)
    Not Islam though, am I right?
    Ooh, ooh, I love quoting myself. I often look for opportunities to quote myself just for fun, but since you didn't read my previous comment I get to do it out of necessity

    "If I had stated that your religion was "not Zoroastrianism", would you say I had correctly ascertained that your religion was Islam?"

    I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 1000. What is it? (Hint: "Not 761" is not the answer to the question)
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by katy__)
    What about your brother? I'm sure he would be able to talk some sense into your parents. I am assuming that because your brother has had the experience of being a youth in uni, he would perhaps be more modern in his way of thinking than your parents. And even though your parents may be experienced themselves, you could always tell them that a LOT of reforms are being made by the education system that have changed the schooling system since they've left education, and you could say that one of the reforms of the education system was that it has made unis outside of London better-equipped for students.

    If you get to a point where you're really desperate, please just inform a teacher. Asian parents usually really respect a teacher's opinion highly (my mum is South Asian, and she always tells me that a teacher is someone to be looked upon with the highest form of respect). Organize a meeting between your parents and your teacher (preferably your favourite teacher or the teacher that teaches the subject you're applying for at uni). Let your teacher do the talking, and your stubborn parents might just give in. In any case, letting another trusted adult know about your predicament will give you a more secure back-up support in case of emergencies.
    non of my siblings are liberal.. they're all really conservative traditional muslims and are supporting my parents in not letting me go.
    My parents won't take the teachers seriously because most of them are white, but it might help so I'm going to try and do that. thanks

    also people who are asking about my brother, he wanted to commute and Idk if i made this clear but we live in London so it wasn't too far for him.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by liquidconfidence)
    This is what I meant about your incapacity to make a worthwhile contribution to this thread.

    'Suffering'? 'SUFFERING'? How is OP suffering exactly? Oh because her parents want her to stay in London?? I see, I see and I'm also suffering because my parents won't let me travel to Afghanistan. Sure.
    Your parents won't "let" you travel to Afghanistan? Do you beg them to treat you like a baby or do you just bend over and take it?
    • Offline

      19
      (Original post by Retrodiction)
      Ooh, ooh, I love quoting myself. I often look for opportunities to quote myself just for fun, but since you didn't read my previous comment I get to do it out of necessity

      "If I had stated that your religion was "not Zoroastrianism", would you say I had correctly ascertained that your religion was Islam?"

      I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 1000. What is it? (Hint: "Not 761" is not the answer to the question)
      But is the religion you follow not Islam?
      Offline

      12
      ReputationRep:
      (Original post by justanotherchica)
      My parents have been controlling my life so much that they're stopping me from make use of opportunities because I'm a girl... and I can't live alone and I can't travel more than 48 miles, and t and they force me to wear a scarf


      I sent off my UCAS application today and all the unis I've applied to are out of London because i'm so dissatisfied with my life right now and I want to have my own independence and not be subjected to their ridiculous rules. I've tried talking to them about it but they refuse to let me leave and I've tried to persuade them so many times but they won't budge at all.

      I'm definitely leaving but idk how, what if they try to physically stop me? what if I run out of money? What if they never let me come back? What if they don't ever talk to me again? and they have threatened some of the above..
      I would recommend to speak to a career advisor or your tutor at your college/sixth form. Is there any specific reasons why they don't want you to study outside London?
      Offline

      17
      ReputationRep:
      (Original post by Lychee627)
      But is the religion you follow not Islam?
      "Is the dinosaur you own not a triceratops?"

      You can't even see that the foundational assumption of your question might be flawed. This really isn't difficult stuff...
      • Offline

        19
        (Original post by Retrodiction)
        "Is the dinosaur you own not a triceratops?"

        You can't even see that the foundational assumption of your question might be flawed. This really isn't difficult stuff...
        Well you answer my question first , do you not follow islam?
        Its a simple question?
        • Thread Starter
        Offline

        11
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by liquidconfidence)
        Also no offence but the fact that you felt the need to include 'Muslim parents' in the thread title is partly why there's so much islamophobia right now.

        What's the fact that they're Muslim got to do with it? Many strict parents don't want their sons/daughters travelling outside the city for a number of reasons.

        You're living in THEIR house. Using THEIR bills and facilities. Yes, you may think that you're an 'adult' but you rely on them for a lot so if they don't want you unnecessarily commuting outside of London for uni then coming back using their resources when you choose, they are not evil people (and yes you can argue it's unnecessary because there's Kings, UCL, Imperial and I bet you haven't even applied to unis that good outside of London).

        For all we know there's another reason why they're being so strict, we don't know your behaviour, you could be sexually promiscuous for all we know and they're trying to limit you. Don't use Islam as an excuse. How can they force you to wear a scarf? Furthermore, what's so bad about covering your hair anyway? You sound like a sulky sullen teenager or a troll.

        The main reason why I'm not allowed to leave is because I'm a "Muslim Asian girl" and their reasoning has nothing to do with my cultural background, rather they try to impose parts of sharia law on me such as the 48 mile rule which restricts me so much because its difficult for me to attend sumemr school or taster days or even open days. They also argue that god has ordained that girls remian with their parents untill they are married and then they will be controlled by their husbands. This is why I included muslim because they try to use Islam to stop me.

        Actually I've been working since I was 15 to support myself in a lot of ways that my mum cant. Yes she pays for bills at home but I try to alleviate other costs.

        Yes they force me to wear a scarf because I'm terrified that they will hurt me if I dont. They have threatened me too because they are aware I'm not happy with it. It's not my choice and I feel constantly restricted by it.
        Offline

        17
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by liquidconfidence)
        The fact that you were speaking about intellectual quality was ironic, that's all.

        Furthermore, 'intellectual quality', what even is that? OOPS someone has clearly been using Microsoft word 2010 synonyms incorrectly!!
        Ironic in what way? Neither sentence formulation is superior to the other.

        Is English your first language, can I ask? You took objection to a perfectly valid sentence structure, and now you seem to having difficulty unpicking the meaning of a pretty simple expression.
        Offline

        17
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by Lychee627)
        Well you answer my question first , do you not follow islam?
        Its a simple question?
        I do follow Islam.

        What does this add to the discussion, exactly?
        • Political Ambassador
        Offline

        15
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by RogerOxon)
        Really:

        And as you mentioned inheritance, there's another blatantly sexist rule.


        I asked a question. Care to answer it?
        Wheres the question and how is inheritance sexist?
        • Thread Starter
        Offline

        11
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by JayN_0)
        I would recommend to speak to a career advisor or your tutor at your college/sixth form. Is there any specific reasons why they don't want you to study outside London?
        They're scared I'll take off my scarf and get involved with boys or have sex but mostly because it is prohibited for girls to live alone in Islam.

        Yeah I plan to speak to a teacher. thanks
        Offline

        18
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by liquidconfidence)
        You have made a series of ridiculous statements. You have people debating over stupidness. You are not even responding the the helpful comments on this thread.

        Therefore, you need help for your attention-seeking, victim syndrome behaviour.

        Mods, close this down. This troll has been fed enough already.
        If anyone's being unconstructive here, it's you.
        Offline

        12
        ReputationRep:
        (Original post by Lychee627)
        But like the question is why were we told? Does it really matter? Not only muslim parents do this?
        Someone may identify and understand the situation even more especially if they are from a similar background .TBH, it's not a big deal
        • Offline

          19
          (Original post by Retrodiction)
          I do follow Islam.

          What does this add to the discussion, exactly?
          Haha lmao :rofl: honestly im so done :lol:
         
         
         
      • See more of what you like on The Student Room

        You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

      • Poll
        Will you be richer or poorer than your parents?
        Useful resources
      • See more of what you like on The Student Room

        You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

      • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

        Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

        Quick reply
        Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.