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    • Thread Starter

    As I get older I am realising that I really don't like the. My mum is not happy in her life and therefore is clinging onto her children to make herself happy. She's forever *****ing about how awful my dad is. My dad doesn't really speak to any of us and just spends his time working. One of my siblings is severely depressed and we all have to tread on eggshells around them for fear of upsetting or making them feel down if we talk about our lives. Another is always going on about how amazing their life is and how lucky they are and how happy they are bla bla bla. One boasts about how happy they are to be married (even tho I am older) and how I should really start looking. I am actually dreading xmas this year as I have realised they always make me feel so drained.

    Does anyone else feel the same?
    • #1

    If I had a choice then my parents definitely wouldn't be people I'd be friends with. They're incredibly close-minded because they live in the UK but don't have any friends who aren't either Korean or Christian so they're basically living in this echochamber. I'm going to be so happy when I go to Uni and I'm probably never going to see them again. I know it sounds awful to say it but I feel like I'll only really start being happy when I'm away from them.
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    • #2

    I won't lie, my parents love me but they certainly don't like me. However, I don't think they want to admit this to themselves. I don't really care either way since I know I don't love them, I can only try to reason to myself that I should be grateful. My situation isn't normal since they are 'good' parents but yours is more than normal.

    A lot of people grow apart from siblings and dislike each other while children and parents find each other's flaws as they grow.
    • #3

    if you could break up or divorce your parents or your family, i would've done that a looong time ago.
    • Community Assistant

    Community Assistant
    I have moments like this too. I absolutely love my mum, she's amazing. She's supporting me through something right now which my dad is really mad about. My dad is very negative and childish and petty. If I make a decision that he doesn't like, then he gives me the silent treatment. It can be something as trivial as deciding to have rice instead of pasta with the chicken. Sometimes I think as an adult, it'll be easier for me to only contact him at birthdays and Christmases. He's so negative it just brings everything down. I don't want to tell him what's going on in my life because I know he'll just shout at me, whereas I can tell my mum anything and know she'll support me.
    • #4

    My parents judge and assume the worst of all of us, they'll make their ignorant opinions about our lives yet they're not close to anyone. My mother will easily disown us for periods of time if we do something she doesn't approve of. She's refused to wash my clothes before, trashed my room. Think she has some mental issues. When I do see them, only a couple of sentences are exchanged before I go upstairs to see my siblings. It's just a bleak cold vibe.
    I wanted to get closer to them once, so I started sitting downstairs with them everyday. Few weeks later, I was accused of taking a £20 note that was downstairs. My mother thought me sitting with them was 'suspicious.' Such ********. If they want a distant relationship with all their daughters then that's their choice. I've even thought about how sad I'll actually be when they're gone. I don't think very.

    A mother shouldn’t be relying on her children to make her happy or for any emotional support. It’s abuse- look up parentification and enmeshment.
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