Is it relatively easier (compared with school) to make friends at uni? I’m going to uni next year and I’ve never made a ‘true’ friend in my life, probably because I have social skills difficulties. Thing is I love the feeling of being around people I’m comfortable with and having a good time. But since I have no friends I cannot do that. Instead I have to get drunk on my own and be really drunk enough to approach strangers and then probably get rejected and ignored by those people for thinking I’m creepy. I really want to fit in at uni with people and be with people I can be happy with and have good time. Please share your experiences, thank you!
Making friends at University? Watch
- Thread Starter
Not everyone's experience of making friends at uni is going to be the same. For some people making friends comes naturally, for a lot of us (me) it doesn't. It depends on a number of things such as whether or not you are staying in halls, whether or not you have flatmates you get along with and of course your own confidence in approaching and striking up conversation with people.
The good thing about starting uni is that it is a fresh start though and nobody has any preconceived ideas about you therefore you have a real chance to escape how people labelled you in high school and reinvent yourself.
Just be friendly. In the beginning try and talk to everyone you meet. The first few weeks everyone is settling in and keen to make friends so most people will be very receptive when you approach and chat to them. If a conversation is going well then ask them if they want to have coffee/lunch/a drink with you after the lecture. I went for a ridiculous amount of coffee with people the first few weeks and no I didn't end up best friends with all of them but it was still nice to have a few familiar faces to say hi to or sit with in class. Chances are the more people you talk to the more likely you will find someone you have a lot in common with and could be friends with. It just requires a little effort.
As for personal experience I was very lucky to meet my best friend the first day of freshers week but that only happened because we met online (university facebook page) and had been chatting for a few weeks before term began. We found out we were both on the same course and that we were both commuting rather than staying in halls and because of this we were both anxious about having nobody to attend freshers week withh. So we arranged to meet on the first day. Now we are best friends but I think it was one of those 'lightning never strikes twice' incidents where I was unusually lucky to find such a good friend so quickly. I found that I had to work A LOT harder to make more friends on my course.
Best of luck to you at uni. Maybe you should do what I did and see if your university has a social media page. You might be able to find people on your course and get to know some people in advance.