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In my 20s and ready for first relationship Watch

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    I've not had a relationship before or done anything past holding hands but I'd like to meet someone in person, not through any online dating app or website. I'm out of university and I don't really have a lot of friends or know any boys that I'm attracted to. The kind of boys I'm attracted to usually go for girls a lot more attractive than me.

    I think I'm average in attractiveness and personality, emotionally mature and stable but I'm a bit shy and awkward and my confidence isn't the best. I'm really not into meeting someone online.

    Tips?
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    I feel that once one leaves uni it becomes more difficult to just organically meet potential bf/gfs. So without going online how is the best way to meet someone. Have you been involved in your church (or whatever place of worship you'd attend) or perhaps you should attend a new location for your place of worship. Also volunteering is always a good way to meet new people but it would need to be with a pretty large volunteer organization. But it will require more than just showing up on a Saturday and helping out. You need to truly get involved and eventually find yourself in a leadership position. The more involved you are the more you'll receive back. Another thing would be to find, join and participate in a mixed sex sports club.

    Another way is just to be honest with your friends and ask them if they know someone they'd be willing to introduce you to. Meeting through friends is still one of the most common ways of meeting a significant other.

    The other thing I would suggest is that you not have a particular 'type' of guy you normally go for. I have found that people who put potential significant others in a particular expectation 'box' end up getting disappointed and end up alone. If you get invited to do something but you don't immediately feel a physical attraction still go -2 or 3 times if given that opportunity- before you decide you're not interested because he's not your 'type'. If you are looking for someone to build a relationship with start looking at personality and character. I promise if you end up liking a guy because of his personality/character he will end up looking very attractive to you. To start by judging if you'd be interested in a guy based on you physical attraction usually doesn't end up working in the long run. Be open to different guys.

    In the end you need to work on your own confidence. Confidence will carry you. Even if inwardly you feel less than confident try your best to put on a brave and confident exterior so that only you know you're feeling a little insecure.

    Best of Luck to you!
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    (Original post by Hopefully1)
    I feel that once one leaves uni it becomes more difficult to just organically meet potential bf/gfs. So without going online how is the best way to meet someone. Have you been involved in your church (or whatever place of worship you'd attend) or perhaps you should attend a new location for your place of worship. Also volunteering is always a good way to meet new people but it would need to be with a pretty large volunteer organization. But it will require more than just showing up on a Saturday and helping out. You need to truly get involved and eventually find yourself in a leadership position. The more involved you are the more you'll receive back. Another thing would be to find, join and participate in a mixed sex sports club.

    Another way is just to be honest with your friends and ask them if they know someone they'd be willing to introduce you to. Meeting through friends is still one of the most common ways of meeting a significant other.

    The other thing I would suggest is that you not have a particular 'type' of guy you normally go for. I have found that people who put potential significant others in a particular expectation 'box' end up getting disappointed and end up alone. If you get invited to do something but you don't immediately feel a physical attraction still go -2 or 3 times if given that opportunity- before you decide you're not interested because he's not your 'type'. If you are looking for someone to build a relationship with start looking at personality and character. I promise if you end up liking a guy because of his personality/character he will end up looking very attractive to you. To start by judging if you'd be interested in a guy based on you physical attraction usually doesn't end up working in the long run. Be open to different guys.

    In the end you need to work on your own confidence. Confidence will carry you. Even if inwardly you feel less than confident try your best to put on a brave and confident exterior so that only you know you're feeling a little insecure.

    Best of Luck to you!
    Thanks for taking your time to reply and help out, I really appreciate it. This is all good advice.
    As for church, I'm not religious so I don't go. I think meeting with friends of friends is a good idea however I don't really have a lot of friends but I think I'll be moving out soon so maybe I'll make some new friends or none at all, it could go either way!

    I don't have a type or any expectations, whether I give boys a "chance" is not really my issue. I'm attracted to character a lot more than appearance but have a hard time finding anyone I really click with even after I get to know them, and meeting new people rarely happens. Maybe I will try to join a club or something in the future. Thanks for the help.
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    I would suggest that you should simply focus more on engaging in activities that require you to be around a lot of people. Don't go there with an expectation of meeting a guy you click with. Just go to have fun, meet new people and have a good time. Talk to others, socialize, crack jokes and see if you like someone. Chances are you'll come across a few people who share your interests, a few of them will be guys, and a few out of those guys (probably just 1 or 2) will be people you could consider dating.
 
 
 
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