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Student Support @ UCL can't help me Watch

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    I lost someone very close to me 6 months ago.
    It's hard to describe exactly what we were but we had been seeing each other for nearly 2 years and I have not been coping well with his death at all and it has lead me into a pretty deep depression. I have so far seen my GP about this and I'm currently on Mirtazapine which is helping a bit. I would like some counselling or therapy to help me but as I don't drive and I live in a small town, there isn't really anything I can go to and there isn't anything my GP can refer me to.

    I'm also currently doing my masters degree at UCL (I commute in from outside of London), but I'm finding it hard with how I'm feeling at the moment. I made an appointment with Student Support Services to see what they could do for me. The arranged my first appointment with a Psychiatrist.
    I was really hoping that this appointment would help give me the first step to getting the support I really need but in all honesty, it was pretty useless.

    He put a lot of words in my mouth- he said: "it sounds like you feel responsible for his death". I do not, in any way, feel responsible. He had an issue with his heart, so in my mind, he would have died no matter what.

    He also spent a while talking about my PCOS which is diagnosed, being treated and is causing me no issues at the moment. Just a waste of time.

    Eventually, he said he was struggling to think of how he could help me. The therapy services at the university has a 3 month waiting list. I'm not really sure what else to do at this point. I emailed my tutor about an upcoming essay a few weeks ago and explained my situation but I haven't received a response. I'm trying so hard to work on the essay as it's due this Thursday but I'm finding it so hard and I just starting thinking about him and I can't stop crying. I have work on Wednesday so I only have today and tomorrow to work on the essay and I'm really really panicking. Its actually only a draft but I feel like it would be stupid not to hand it in and get feedback. I don't know where to go for help at this uni or what to do.
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    (Original post by beccagood95)
    I lost someone very close to me 6 months ago.
    It's hard to describe exactly what we were but we had been seeing each other for nearly 2 years and I have not been coping well with his death at all and it has lead me into a pretty deep depression. I have so far seen my GP about this and I'm currently on Mirtazapine which is helping a bit. I would like some counselling or therapy to help me but as I don't drive and I live in a small town, there isn't really anything I can go to and there isn't anything my GP can refer me to.

    I'm also currently doing my masters degree at UCL (I commute in from outside of London), but I'm finding it hard with how I'm feeling at the moment. I made an appointment with Student Support Services to see what they could do for me. The arranged my first appointment with a Psychiatrist.
    I was really hoping that this appointment would help give me the first step to getting the support I really need but in all honesty, it was pretty useless.

    He put a lot of words in my mouth- he said: "it sounds like you feel responsible for his death". I do not, in any way, feel responsible. He had an issue with his heart, so in my mind, he would have died no matter what.

    He also spent a while talking about my PCOS which is diagnosed, being treated and is causing me no issues at the moment. Just a waste of time.

    Eventually, he said he was struggling to think of how he could help me. The therapy services at the university has a 3 month waiting list. I'm not really sure what else to do at this point. I emailed my tutor about an upcoming essay a few weeks ago and explained my situation but I haven't received a response. I'm trying so hard to work on the essay as it's due this Thursday but I'm finding it so hard and I just starting thinking about him and I can't stop crying. I have work on Wednesday so I only have today and tomorrow to work on the essay and I'm really really panicking. Its actually only a draft but I feel like it would be stupid not to hand it in and get feedback. I don't know where to go for help at this uni or what to do.
    Go to see your local GP. They may be able to help you.

    It is sad that a top university like UCL has 3 months wait for their mental health therapy services.

    Also try to take your mind off this situation like joining clubs, meeting with friends or doing other activities.

    All the best.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    Go to see your local GP. They may be able to help you.

    It is sad that a top university like UCL has 3 months wait for their mental health therapy services.

    Also try to take your mind off this situation like joining clubs, meeting with friends or doing other activities.

    All the best.
    I did say in the post that I have already been to see my GP, and that they have given me Mirtazapine but are unable to refer me to any therapy.

    But thank you. Work keeps me busy and so I do feel fine sometimes, but with an essay writing task that requires me to just sit and use my brain by myself, I find it very hard to stop my brain from wondering back to him
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    (Original post by beccagood95)
    I did say in the post that I have already been to see my GP, and that they have given me Mirtazapine but are unable to refer me to any therapy.

    But thank you. Work keeps me busy and so I do feel fine sometimes, but with an essay writing task that requires me to just sit and use my brain by myself, I find it very hard to stop my brain from wondering back to him
    Do you mean there is nothing there for therapy, or nothing you are able to get to because you don't drive?
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    (Original post by Bill Nye)
    Do you mean there is nothing there for therapy, or nothing you are able to get to because you don't drive?
    Nothing she can refer me to for therapy. There are some places I can self-refer to but I can't get there because I don't drive.
    My GP is lovely and willing to talk to me about anything I need to talk about but the services in the area are just awful.
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    (Original post by beccagood95)
    Nothing she can refer me to for therapy. There are some places I can self-refer to but I can't get there because I don't drive.
    My GP is lovely and willing to talk to me about anything I need to talk about but the services in the area are just awful.
    Can you not get the bus or get a lift there or something?

    How do you get to uni?
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    (Original post by Bill Nye)
    Can you not get the bus or get a lift there or something?

    How do you get to uni?
    I get the train and the tube. The train is a 30 minute walk from my house so it takes about 2 hours to get there. I can't get a lift because my Dad is just bloody awful and I don't really have many friends in the area. The buses are terrible so the only other option is the train which is expensive and long and I just can't afford to, I'm not left with very much cash at the end of the month. If it was within walking distance or I could get a bus there, I'd have gotten counselling months ago.
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    But the main issue isn't about therapy in general, it's about getting the support from the university. The Student Psychological Services have been no help, my personal tutor hasn't been any help, so I'm not sure where to go from here.
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    Hi I found it really difficult to get the right help straight away at university too because everyone seems to redirect you to someone else.
    What you need to do is contact your university's Disability Team and tell them you want a Summary of Adjustments. They should give you a medical form to get filled out from your GP. Your GP needs to give you a written diagnosis for depression, which shouldn't be a problem as you're on medication for it. They can charge you an admin fee of around £30 for this and the university usually won't reimburse you for that. Once you give the university a written diagnosis, they can draw up a Summary of reasonable Adjustments. Most universities have something like this. You discuss with the disability team some of the adjustments that you might need e.g extra time, separate room, coursework extensions. They'll write this up and then all of your lecturers will have access to this. I find it really helpful for things like group work because I can usually email the lecturer myself and ask "can I work alone on this assignment? Please refer to my summary of adjustments or discuss with ___ from the disability team if you need more info."
    As soon as you mention that you have a Summary of adjustments, lecturers are suddenly much nicer and more reasonable. I literally couldn't get through to anyone until I got a written diagnosis and a Summary of adjustments.

    I hope that helps. Also for anyone else reading, this system applies to most universities and also means you'reeligible for DSA, which the disability team can help you apply for.
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      (Original post by beccagood95)
      But the main issue isn't about therapy in general, it's about getting the support from the university. The Student Psychological Services have been no help, my personal tutor hasn't been any help, so I'm not sure where to go from here.
      I agree with previous posts, in that it’s quite sad to see universities not being able to provide effective mental health support to students, and with a 3 month waiting list, that’s ridiculous. I don’t believe personal tutors or any uni associated services are much benefit, or can do much to help you - this is specifically one of the reasons why I didn’t personally inform them or disclose any information. I don’t even think you are legally obliged to inform a university if you have a mental health problem, but I’m not sure. The problem with universities, is that they don’t have an efficient framework or structured approach to allow for mental health provision/services. Many students like you and myself will be left on the side. 😧

      I was very lucky, in the sense that when I initially sought help my from GP, I was referred to mental health specialists. I’d suggest you either try private, or ask your GP that you would like to try external counselling/therapy.
     
     
     
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