Turn on thread page Beta

How to stop a friend chosing the same universities as you? watch

    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by justcallmefoxxy)
    I'd just stop talking about which universities i was interested in, when he gets on the topic just say you're really fed up of uni talk and you'd like to talk about something else!

    And I understand the whole fresh start thing... trying to go somewhere where not a lot of Bruneians are likely to be at.

    The best thing to do is either:

    1) put up with it- becuase it is very unlikely that you will bump into each other if you are on different courses and you will be in different accomodation- and when he gets there no doubt he will make new friends and not cling to you...
    2) Tell him that you would like to make a fresh start and though you understand that he is enitiled to apply wherever he wants, perhaps a fresh start would be better for him too....if he still insists on applying to the same places as you then just say to him that for the first few weeks you think it might be better to not see him- so that you can both concentrate on making new friends- then you can meet up and you will both have new sets of friends.....

    I wouldn't lie to him, becuase he is VERY likely to find out and that will hurt him more than if you gently tell him the truth. But make it clear that its not becuase you don't like him, and you do still want to be friends etc.

    Ruthie xx
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    I can see where you're coming from with wanting to make a fresh start but I'd do anything to make my best friend come to the same university so finding it hard to empathise :cool:
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ~Sam~)
    My best friend is really annoying me because he keeps deciding to apply to the same unis as me. First it was Cardiff, then Exeter, then Manchester. I didn't mind at first because of course he's entitled to like the same places as me, but at this rate we're going to end up putting the same six places down! He was interested in Bath, Reading and RH and asked me to come to the open days with him but when I said I didn't want to he decided that he didnt either. It's not that it would be a really awful thing if we went to the same uni, but he's quite clingy and I think it would probably stop me making other friends. I want a new start for me, and I just feel it wouldnt be the same. I visited Sheffield today and now he's started asking me all about that too. What do you think I should do?
    I'm glad I'm not your best friend!!!!!
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Fluffy)
    I'm glad I'm not your best friend!!!!!
    really? I know I probably sound like a *****, but I'm not honest! I wouldn't mind so much if they were the places he wanted to go to but I know he's going to them because I am.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ~Sam~)
    really? I know I probably sound like a *****, but I'm not honest! I wouldn't mind so much if they were the places he wanted to go to but I know he's going to them because I am.
    Rather than thinking about yourself, how about you talk to your friend, find out why they're not standing on their own two feet - is it laziness or something deeper, like fear, shyness etc?

    There's obviously a problem, what you describe is meerly a symptom...
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Perhaps he has a crush on you ! *semi-serious*
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ~Sam~)
    My best friend is really annoying me because he keeps deciding to apply to the same unis as me. First it was Cardiff, then Exeter, then Manchester. I didn't mind at first because of course he's entitled to like the same places as me, but at this rate we're going to end up putting the same six places down! He was interested in Bath, Reading and RH and asked me to come to the open days with him but when I said I didn't want to he decided that he didnt either. It's not that it would be a really awful thing if we went to the same uni, but he's quite clingy and I think it would probably stop me making other friends. I want a new start for me, and I just feel it wouldnt be the same. I visited Sheffield today and now he's started asking me all about that too. What do you think I should do?
    Turn gay, and start going all touchy feely on him. That would be sure to put him off, unless he is gay.

    yeah him proberly really likes you, I at first started choosing the same unis as best friend was choosing even courses I didnt like just to be with her as I liked her so much. But that changed once ours grades when to pot. I then had to choose another uni and course I wanted to do instead but I am really pleased to be doing a subject that I like and not what someone else wants to do. If you are doing diffferent courses and the ones that you really want to do I think it would be ok otherwise 1 of you are going to fail in the first year if you cant do or dont like the course. Why dont you ask him if he likes you maybe that will quiten things down. I couldnt leave my best friend alone for more 5 mins at one stage. But this sort of thing will slow down after a while and will give you some space. Just ask your best friend how much he really likes you.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Curiosity)
    Turn gay, and start going all touchy feely on him. That would be sure to put him off, unless he is gay.
    If he actually was gay, you'd be in for it.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    OK so your mums are good friends are you are looking at different courses.

    Let your mum know how good a particular course is at ui for your subject but unfortunatly it is really bad for your friend's subject. You could even tell your mum how worried you are that your friend wants to go to the same uni because it will be a mistake for them.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by justcallmefoxxy)
    If he actually was gay, you'd be in for it.
    But he might be... it's worth thinking about you know.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by ~Sam~)
    My best friend is really annoying me because he keeps deciding to apply to the same unis as me. First it was Cardiff, then Exeter, then Manchester. I didn't mind at first because of course he's entitled to like the same places as me, but at this rate we're going to end up putting the same six places down! He was interested in Bath, Reading and RH and asked me to come to the open days with him but when I said I didn't want to he decided that he didnt either. It's not that it would be a really awful thing if we went to the same uni, but he's quite clingy and I think it would probably stop me making other friends. I want a new start for me, and I just feel it wouldnt be the same. I visited Sheffield today and now he's started asking me all about that too. What do you think I should do?
    Exact same thing has happened to me this year. My friend put down sheffield as her insurance and it was my firm, she missed her grades so we're both off to the same uni, same year. On top of this I have been in the same class as her since Reception class in primary school

    But we've applied to different courses and different halls, which is where you make your friends I think and only if you make plans to meet up will you end up seeing them.

    I was a little annoyed at first, but I think it could be fun after the first couple of months of settling in.

    Be straight with him as far as halls are concerned - tell him that you don't want to be in the same one for both your sakes. You may have to sacrifice the halls you really want to go to, I know I had to prepare myself for that, but it turns out she wanted a different one anyway!

    I know what it feels like, and I know that it is a big deal, this is your life for the next three years and you shouldn't let anyone comprimise it. Saying that, make the most of the situation...if you can!
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Curiosity)
    Turn gay, and start going all touchy feely on him. That would be sure to put him off, unless he is gay.
    Erm...I'm female. Lol maybe I should have made that clearer
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    LOL I think we all assumed you were a male Sam.

    Well as you're not it may well be that he likes you. Any signs?
 
 
 
Poll
Did you get less than your required grades and still get into university?
Useful resources
Uni match

Applying to uni?

Our tool will help you find the perfect course

Articles:

Debate and current affairs guidelinesDebate and current affairs wiki

Quick link:

Educational debate unanswered threads

Groups associated with this forum:

View associated groups

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.