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I never go for the "nice guy"

I've always thought I chose guys who had a good personality and were good looking and popular, but it seems like I always go for boys who have bad rep as opposed to the nice guys I keep strictly as friends. I don't understand why though? When I first meet them it's like I choose to ignore how they've treated girls in the past and continue to date them. I think I choose these guys over nice boys because I don't generally feel a strong physical attraction to "nice boys" but I've been feeling really guilty about this recently.

I've been in some bad relationships, the last few guys I dated started off as perfect boyfriends but ended up cheating or lying to me, and in some cases worse. And through my last relationship and break up one of my guy friends has been there for me like all the time, he ended up falling for me and I feel like I might have led him on a bit.

I did think I liked him but the more I think about it I don't think I really did because all I saw in him was personality and nothing else, he also seems v inexperienced which put me off as I'm used to dating guys who are older than me (uni age). I've just starting seeing a new guy and I feel guilty because the other "nice guy" has wasted a lot of time and effort on me, I didn't mean to lead him and now idk what to do.

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Let him bang to compensate for the wasted time
Reply 2
I think it's essentially because you feel that the bad boys are somewhat more exciting? Like something you've never experienced before. So I guess it's curiosity.
Nice guys are somewhat boring.
Because you're an idiot
Original post by Anonymous
I've always thought I chose guys who had a good personality and were good looking and popular, but it seems like I always go for boys who have bad rep as opposed to the nice guys I keep strictly as friends. I don't understand why though? When I first meet them it's like I choose to ignore how they've treated girls in the past and continue to date them. I think I choose these guys over nice boys because I don't generally feel a strong physical attraction to "nice boys" but I've been feeling really guilty about this recently.

I've been in some bad relationships, the last few guys I dated started off as perfect boyfriends but ended up cheating or lying to me, and in some cases worse. And through my last relationship and break up one of my guy friends has been there for me like all the time, he ended up falling for me and I feel like I might have led him on a bit.

I did think I liked him but the more I think about it I don't think I really did because all I saw in him was personality and nothing else, he also seems v inexperienced which put me off as I'm used to dating guys who are older than me (uni age). I've just starting seeing a new guy and I feel guilty because the other "nice guy" has wasted a lot of time and effort on me, I didn't mean to lead him and now idk what to do.



Just go for it if thats what you like.
If you want to go for boys that have treat women badly then that’s you. People will say nice guys are boring but I think they’re the best
There's a difference between "nice guys" (r/niceguys) and genuine nice guys. Which one of these categories are you talking about?
Original post by Jonjonbo
There's a difference between "nice guys" (r/niceguys) and genuine nice guys. Which one of these categories are you talking about?


I swear there isn’t even a difference.
Original post by lmaooome
I swear there isn’t even a difference.


No, "nice guys" can't talk to girls, and are often insecure about a lot of things. Real nice guys are nice to talk to, and they don't believe they're totally incapable of talking to women.
Original post by Jonjonbo
No, "nice guys" can't talk to girls, and are often insecure about a lot of things. Real nice guys are nice to talk to, and they don't believe they're totally incapable of talking to women.

I think, she’s talking about the second catergory because the “nice guy” she was talking to clearly was capable of talking to her.
Reply 11
Original post by lmaooome
I swear there isn’t even a difference.


The difference is that "nice guys" think that by being nice, they will get a girl to like them. It feels fake or put on and very cringey.

Nice guys (no quotations) are guys who are genuinely nice without having the sense of entitlement. Basically all guys should be nice, it's part of being a decent human being.
Reply 12
I'd start by explaining to the guy who has spent a lot of time with you, if he is going above and beyond to try to get you to like him romantically, to stop, because you do not think of him as boyfriend material. Then the guy will know where you two are and that he has no chance and therefore will either stay as your friend or not. In the future be vigilant and if a guy is becoming obviously keen for a romantic relationship and you aren't interested, tell him. In relation to who you fancy I wouldn't feel guilty over it, but i would try to reflect on why you would bother daing guys who have a "bad rep". How do you value yourself? Do you feel like you only deserve these men because you are unworthy of someone who will treat you well? If you just like bad boys because they are dangerous and exciting, then fair enough, but are you going to allow yourself to be hurt by these guys who are known to the community to be poor at relationships through infidelity and lying? Have you tried waiting for someone who has all your criteria, but will treat you well?
(edited 6 years ago)
As a guy I never really get on with “nice guys”, they’re often too sensitive for their own good and quite geeky so it’s probably even harder for you to talk to them, especially when they’re shy. The guys that are normal are nice guys and normally they are fun to be around plus tend to have a better sense of humour, for me that’s the difference between a “nice guy” and a guy that’s nice. If you label someone as simply “nice guy”, it just implies he’s boring tbh
Well I'm assuming the nice guy is just what girls often miscommunicate as "too nice", ie nice is their only redeeming quality and they're actually not that interesting in any way.

That's okay but I wouldn't advise going for guys who have a track record of treating girls like **** instead. Just be single till you can find somebody interesting who treats ya well.
Original post by Jonjonbo
There's a difference between "nice guys" (r/niceguys) and genuine nice guys. Which one of these categories are you talking about?


Usually when a girl knows she's on about a "nice guy" as opposed to an actually nice person they don't refer to them as nice. Because they aren't. OP had no quotation marks, so presumably dude being talked about is a decent enough lad in the moral sense.

Original post by 22sgw
I'd start by explaining to the guy who has spent a lot of time with you, if he is going above and beyond to try to get you to like him romantically, to stop, because you do not think of him as boyfriend material. Then the guy will know where you two are and that he has no chance and therefore will either stay as your friend or not.

There is literally no need to do that at all if OP is going for other guys. It tends to send a very clear message on its own.
Let's be honest, nice guys are boring. Bad boys are sexy

That's why we sleep with the bad boys and marry the good boys
As a self-professed nice guy; the nicest guy to ever live in fact, I think the excessive use of "like" is unbearable.
Original post by lmaooome
Nice guys are somewhat boring.


It's boring being with someone who'd treat you with respect..

























































Mkay.
Original post by liquidconfidence
It's boring being with someone who'd treat you with respect..

























































Mkay.


All her posts on here indicate the quintessence of ineffable human stupidity.
thanks op - imma make sure to beat my wife and kids when time comes :yy:

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