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Was I too harsh on her?

I have a friend who takes things way too seriously. She accused one of my other friends of being a control freak and how she got jealous whenever she went of to talk to anyone else.

I tried changing the subject so many times but they got into an argument. Then one of my friends (the one who got accused of being a control freak) said something... I think she was just advising her to listen to me and talk about something else. Then my friend who takes things too seriously, said: "I'm not even her mate because she always leaves us for them" By them, she means the friends who are in my lessons who I sometimes hang about with, because they're fun. Then I said: "You accuse her of being a control freak, yet, you always get jealous when I hang around with them-" I didn't even finish and she cut me off. She started raising her voice saying: "No thats different you always leave us" There was a cold silence for a little. Then one of my other friends had a snickers bar and she said to my friend who takes things seriously: "Get some nuts" We all laughed expect her. Then I said: "You're not you when you're hungry" So then, my friend accused me of calling her fat because she already ate. Thats not what I meant. I meant that she was not being her usual bubbly self. But before I could explain she stormed off. Then my other friend said: "That was well tight it's like someone saying to you why do you wear that cast on your hand all the time?" Because I wear a splint on my hand, it's like a cast because I have hand dysplasia so I wear a splint too keep it straight.

I feel really bad, she's not replying to my texts and before I could even go after her the bell went so I had to go to lesson... Was I too harsh on her? I never intended on hurting her feelings.

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

I don't think you were too harsh. It isn't like it was actually meant to insult her. She will probably come around eventually and start talking to you again. I have said much worse to a good friend of mine (she friend-zone me!! kmn) and still likes to talk to me.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

It does seem like a little bit of a jump to go from the phrase "you're not you when you're hungry" to "you're fat"

Reply 3

FluffyOwl02

Original post by Anonymous

It does seem like a little bit of a jump to go from the phrase "you're not you when you're hungry" to "you're fat"

What do you mean by 'jump phrase'? :smile:

Reply 4

lil minx

I bet you are all teens am I right?

Trust me. This "argument" will blow over.

I don't think you were harsh. No. But she defintley over-reacted and you were a bit insensitive about her feeling left out. She probably felt like you were all poking fun at her, although i get you were all trying to lighten the mood.

Do you leave her out? Why not include her next time you hang out with these girls. Then she may start seeing you acting like her friend again.

The fat thing? not sure where she got that from. Talk about jumping to conclusions.

This is all really childish tbh,

Reply 5

FluffyOwl02

Original post by lil minx

What I do basically I have a variety of friendship groups. Sometimes at lunch I'll hang with the 3 girls that argued today then I'll go see what my other friends are doing.

She is already mad at me for this thinking I ditch those 3 but I do invite them and they sometimes decline it. Once I was sat alone and the other girls called me over because I was lonely. I sat with those girls thinking the others would come, but I called their names and gestured and they obviously didn't hear me. One of them was fine about it but the girl I who I upset was already mad at me for that and when I explained that I did call them she called me a liar saying i'm a fake and I think Im so special because of my hand and how I take 'advantage' of it. But I don't get how I could even take advantage of something like that. I didn't know I was upsetting her and she's not forgiving me for that either.

She said she can't forgive me.