Christmas Jokes

Watch
Kindred
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 3 years ago
#1
Okay guys it's December now which means Christmas is an acceptable topic of discussion and what better way to start things off than with some jokes! I'll go first (don't worry, I won't take the good ones)...

Who delivers presents to cats?
Spoiler:
Show

Santa Claws!



What does fish Santa say?
Spoiler:
Show

blub blub blub. Merry Fishmas!


After those terrible jokes you'll need to post better ones to defend humour! And if you think you have a real cracker of a joke, why not turn it into a Christmas jumper design and enter it in our Christmas jumper competition?
0
reply
COYS...TTID
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#2
Report 3 years ago
#2
This is the most cringey thread I’ve ever seen lol
2
reply
Rum Ham
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#3
Report 3 years ago
#3
What song does Santa strip to?

I'm sexy and I snow it!
3
reply
It's****ingWOODY
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#4
Report 3 years ago
#4
I ****ing hate Christmas.

Whoever's behind its invention should be crucified...
0
reply
It's****ingWOODY
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#5
Report 3 years ago
#5
Jeremy Kyle's 12 days of Christmas:

12 pairs of trainers
11 pairs of fake Uggs
10 Richmond Kingsize
9pm curfew
8 snotty noses
7 different dads
6 bags of weed
5 sovereign rings
4 stolen rims
3 ASBOs
2 many beers
And a brand new STD
2
reply
04MR17
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#6
Report 3 years ago
#6
Image
0
reply
Ryanthom100
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#7
Report 3 years ago
#7
(Original post by It's****ingWOODY)
I ****ing hate Christmas.

Whoever's behind its invention should be crucified...
Why do u hate it so much? :lol:
0
reply
Jack22031994
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#8
Report 3 years ago
#8
(Original post by Kindred)
Okay guys it's December now which means Christmas is an acceptable topic of discussion and what better way to start things off than with some jokes! I'll go first (don't worry, I won't take the good ones)...

Who delivers presents to cats?
Spoiler:
Show


Santa Claws!




What does fish Santa say?
Spoiler:
Show


blub blub blub. Merry Fishmas!



After those terrible jokes you'll need to post better ones to defend humour! And if you think you have a real cracker of a joke, why not turn it into a Christmas jumper design and enter it in our Christmas jumper competition?
The 4 stages of life:
1. You believe in Father Christmas
2. You don't believe in Father Christmas
3. You dress up as Father Christmas
4. You look like Father Christmas
2
reply
04MR17
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#9
Report 3 years ago
#9
(Original post by Jack22031994)
The 4 stages of life:
1. You believe in Father Christmas
2. You don't believe in Father Christmas
3. You dress up as Father Christmas
4. You look like Father Christmas
He. Is. Real.:mad:
0
reply
It's****ingWOODY
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#10
Report 3 years ago
#10
(Original post by Ryanthom100)
Why do u hate it so much? :lol:
I can't help but feel like nobody's spotted the joke so far :holmes:
0
reply
04MR17
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#11
Report 3 years ago
#11
(Original post by It's****ingWOODY)
I can't help but feel like nobody's spotted the joke so far :holmes:
I have.
0
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#12
Report 3 years ago
#12
Mummy why are you putting 007 and George Smiley in the blender ?

Spoiler:
Show
Santa loves his minced spies
0
reply
Ryanthom100
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#13
Report 3 years ago
#13
(Original post by It's****ingWOODY)
I can't help but feel like nobody's spotted the joke so far :holmes:
I think I got the joke now 😂
0
reply
T0mas
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#14
Report 3 years ago
#14
Who is santa's favorite singer?

Elf-is Prelsey
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Feeling behind at school/college? What is the best thing your teachers could to help you catch up?

Extra compulsory independent learning activities (eg, homework tasks) (2)
4.08%
Run extra compulsory lessons or workshops (7)
14.29%
Focus on making the normal lesson time with them as high quality as possible (6)
12.24%
Focus on making the normal learning resources as high quality/accessible as possible (5)
10.2%
Provide extra optional activities, lessons and/or workshops (20)
40.82%
Assess students, decide who needs extra support and focus on these students (9)
18.37%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise