I need a bit of help with some issues with uni and housemates
(This doesn't really seem to fit into any category elsewhere so I will put it here)
Hi, I am 19 and I have a few problems that'd I'd like some thoughts from a third party on. To summarise, I am in the 2nd year of Computer Science at a pretty decent university (top 20) and I absolutely hate my life and prospects for a number of reasons, the problem is that I cannot distinguish the prime factor in the suffering (although other issues aren't here since I am pretty sure they aren't the problem).
For a start, my grades are suffering because the entire marking process appears to be arbitrary and the lecturers don't teach. Now, I am not a retard (I actually talked to my advisor about this and It turns out that I got in the top 4% of the course last year, of 300 people, while almost never going to lectures due to the above problem last year), but I cannot understand what the lecturers are going on about, and nobody else I know really does either. As a result, I have noticed that at least 2/3s of the people on the course are gone (based on the drop in people in lectures) and have been told that it is closer to 80% (although, this is information from my friend who talked to one of the lecturers, whom he is friends with). I don't think it is the difficulty of the course, although some of the assessments seem overly difficult. For instance, when a guy with a masters degree in computational mathematics cannot figure out a 2nd-year algorithms introductory assessment I think there is an issue. As a result, in spite of programming and doing computers as a hobby for a few years before uni, I have lost all will to do it, and actually have a physical aversion to parts of it now. I do still have an interest in philosophy and history, however, and have the grades to go to a far better university for this.
However, that's not the only problem, my housemates are disgusting and, I think, mentally ill too. I know at least one has major depression (I imagine from the course), but the problem is that at least one has some bizarre attitudes towards women and sexuality in general. I will try not to be explicit, but I will tell a story here. The roommate in question uses "receptacles" for various fluids, and he used to clean them out in the bath. Once he emptied his "receptacles" into the bathtub without telling anyone and complained to me that the bath was clogged the next day. I asked my other housemate who uses the bath if it was him (since I knew it wasn't me) and he said it wasn't him (I trust the guy so you can probably see where this goes). So I go "Well, **** it", and loosen up around the bath ring. So I felt this weird cold yogurt like substance around the ring (I think you can guess what it was), and I immediately knew what it was. When I said to him that I had loosened it up and solved the problem he gave me the most horrified look I have seen in a while and moved about a foot away from me. I could have snapped the **** in two, I was so angry that I am surprised I didn't explode at him then. On top of that, the other housemates once almost ordered whores, and, as a Roman Catholic, I found that revolting. We ended up getting into a somewhat heated argument about that one in a spoons, because I tried in vain to explain that the satisfaction of a relationship with women comes from the love you can feel and the competency you express when chatting to them, not from, as they'd put it "Skipping the middleman of the bar and just giving her the money". I have no idea why I decided to live with these people (I found out about all this crazy **** after the tenancy agreement was already signed) and neither do my other friends, who are, thankfully, are normal and are on other courses.
As you can no doubt see, I am in a bit of a disgusting pickle, and I don't have any idea what to do, and what is the prime issue.
Help
Hi, I am 19 and I have a few problems that'd I'd like some thoughts from a third party on. To summarise, I am in the 2nd year of Computer Science at a pretty decent university (top 20) and I absolutely hate my life and prospects for a number of reasons, the problem is that I cannot distinguish the prime factor in the suffering (although other issues aren't here since I am pretty sure they aren't the problem).
For a start, my grades are suffering because the entire marking process appears to be arbitrary and the lecturers don't teach. Now, I am not a retard (I actually talked to my advisor about this and It turns out that I got in the top 4% of the course last year, of 300 people, while almost never going to lectures due to the above problem last year), but I cannot understand what the lecturers are going on about, and nobody else I know really does either. As a result, I have noticed that at least 2/3s of the people on the course are gone (based on the drop in people in lectures) and have been told that it is closer to 80% (although, this is information from my friend who talked to one of the lecturers, whom he is friends with). I don't think it is the difficulty of the course, although some of the assessments seem overly difficult. For instance, when a guy with a masters degree in computational mathematics cannot figure out a 2nd-year algorithms introductory assessment I think there is an issue. As a result, in spite of programming and doing computers as a hobby for a few years before uni, I have lost all will to do it, and actually have a physical aversion to parts of it now. I do still have an interest in philosophy and history, however, and have the grades to go to a far better university for this.
However, that's not the only problem, my housemates are disgusting and, I think, mentally ill too. I know at least one has major depression (I imagine from the course), but the problem is that at least one has some bizarre attitudes towards women and sexuality in general. I will try not to be explicit, but I will tell a story here. The roommate in question uses "receptacles" for various fluids, and he used to clean them out in the bath. Once he emptied his "receptacles" into the bathtub without telling anyone and complained to me that the bath was clogged the next day. I asked my other housemate who uses the bath if it was him (since I knew it wasn't me) and he said it wasn't him (I trust the guy so you can probably see where this goes). So I go "Well, **** it", and loosen up around the bath ring. So I felt this weird cold yogurt like substance around the ring (I think you can guess what it was), and I immediately knew what it was. When I said to him that I had loosened it up and solved the problem he gave me the most horrified look I have seen in a while and moved about a foot away from me. I could have snapped the **** in two, I was so angry that I am surprised I didn't explode at him then. On top of that, the other housemates once almost ordered whores, and, as a Roman Catholic, I found that revolting. We ended up getting into a somewhat heated argument about that one in a spoons, because I tried in vain to explain that the satisfaction of a relationship with women comes from the love you can feel and the competency you express when chatting to them, not from, as they'd put it "Skipping the middleman of the bar and just giving her the money". I have no idea why I decided to live with these people (I found out about all this crazy **** after the tenancy agreement was already signed) and neither do my other friends, who are, thankfully, are normal and are on other courses.
As you can no doubt see, I am in a bit of a disgusting pickle, and I don't have any idea what to do, and what is the prime issue.
Help
Apologies about the formatting, it won't let me go back and edit it.
I've formatted it properly
(This doesn't really seem to fit into any category elsewhere so I will put it here)
Hi, I am 19 and I have a few problems that'd I'd like some thoughts from a third party on. To summarise, I am in the 2nd year of Computer Science at a pretty decent university (top 20) and I absolutely hate my life and prospects for a number of reasons, the problem is that I cannot distinguish the prime factor in the suffering (although other issues aren't here since I am pretty sure they aren't the problem).
For a start, my grades are suffering because the entire marking process appears to be arbitrary and the lecturers don't teach. Now, I am not a retard (I actually talked to my advisor about this and It turns out that I got in the top 4% of the course last year, of 300 people, while almost never going to lectures due to the above problem last year), but I cannot understand what the lecturers are going on about, and nobody else I know really does either. As a result, I have noticed that at least 2/3s of the people on the course are gone (based on the drop in people in lectures) and have been told that it is closer to 80% (although, this is information from my friend who talked to one of the lecturers, whom he is friends with). I don't think it is the difficulty of the course, although some of the assessments seem overly difficult. For instance, when a guy with a masters degree in computational mathematics cannot figure out a 2nd-year algorithms introductory assessment I think there is an issue. As a result, in spite of programming and doing computers as a hobby for a few years before uni, I have lost all will to do it, and actually have a physical aversion to parts of it now. I do still have an interest in philosophy and history, however, and have the grades to go to a far better university for this.
However, that's not the only problem, my housemates are disgusting and, I think, mentally ill too. I know at least one has major depression (I imagine from the course), but the problem is that at least one has some bizarre attitudes towards women and sexuality in general. I will try not to be explicit, but I will tell a story here. The roommate in question uses "receptacles" for various fluids, and he used to clean them out in the bath. Once he emptied his "receptacles" into the bathtub without telling anyone and complained to me that the bath was clogged the next day. I asked my other housemate who uses the bath if it was him (since I knew it wasn't me) and he said it wasn't him (I trust the guy so you can probably see where this goes). So I go "Well, **** it", and loosen up around the bath ring. So I felt this weird cold yogurt like substance around the ring (I think you can guess what it was), and I immediately knew what it was. When I said to him that I had loosened it up and solved the problem he gave me the most horrified look I have seen in a while and moved about a foot away from me. I could have snapped the **** in two, I was so angry that I am surprised I didn't explode at him then. On top of that, the other housemates once almost ordered whores, and, as a Roman Catholic, I found that revolting. We ended up getting into a somewhat heated argument about that one in a spoons, because I tried in vain to explain that the satisfaction of a relationship with women comes from the love you can feel and the competency you express when chatting to them, not from, as they'd put it "Skipping the middleman of the bar and just giving her the money".
I have no idea why I decided to live with these people (I found out about all this crazy **** after the tenancy agreement was already signed) and neither do my other friends, who are, thankfully, are normal and are on other courses.
As you can no doubt see, I am in a bit of a disgusting pickle, and I don't have any idea what to do, and what is the prime issue.
Help
(This doesn't really seem to fit into any category elsewhere so I will put it here)
Hi, I am 19 and I have a few problems that'd I'd like some thoughts from a third party on. To summarise, I am in the 2nd year of Computer Science at a pretty decent university (top 20) and I absolutely hate my life and prospects for a number of reasons, the problem is that I cannot distinguish the prime factor in the suffering (although other issues aren't here since I am pretty sure they aren't the problem).
For a start, my grades are suffering because the entire marking process appears to be arbitrary and the lecturers don't teach. Now, I am not a retard (I actually talked to my advisor about this and It turns out that I got in the top 4% of the course last year, of 300 people, while almost never going to lectures due to the above problem last year), but I cannot understand what the lecturers are going on about, and nobody else I know really does either. As a result, I have noticed that at least 2/3s of the people on the course are gone (based on the drop in people in lectures) and have been told that it is closer to 80% (although, this is information from my friend who talked to one of the lecturers, whom he is friends with). I don't think it is the difficulty of the course, although some of the assessments seem overly difficult. For instance, when a guy with a masters degree in computational mathematics cannot figure out a 2nd-year algorithms introductory assessment I think there is an issue. As a result, in spite of programming and doing computers as a hobby for a few years before uni, I have lost all will to do it, and actually have a physical aversion to parts of it now. I do still have an interest in philosophy and history, however, and have the grades to go to a far better university for this.
However, that's not the only problem, my housemates are disgusting and, I think, mentally ill too. I know at least one has major depression (I imagine from the course), but the problem is that at least one has some bizarre attitudes towards women and sexuality in general. I will try not to be explicit, but I will tell a story here. The roommate in question uses "receptacles" for various fluids, and he used to clean them out in the bath. Once he emptied his "receptacles" into the bathtub without telling anyone and complained to me that the bath was clogged the next day. I asked my other housemate who uses the bath if it was him (since I knew it wasn't me) and he said it wasn't him (I trust the guy so you can probably see where this goes). So I go "Well, **** it", and loosen up around the bath ring. So I felt this weird cold yogurt like substance around the ring (I think you can guess what it was), and I immediately knew what it was. When I said to him that I had loosened it up and solved the problem he gave me the most horrified look I have seen in a while and moved about a foot away from me. I could have snapped the **** in two, I was so angry that I am surprised I didn't explode at him then. On top of that, the other housemates once almost ordered whores, and, as a Roman Catholic, I found that revolting. We ended up getting into a somewhat heated argument about that one in a spoons, because I tried in vain to explain that the satisfaction of a relationship with women comes from the love you can feel and the competency you express when chatting to them, not from, as they'd put it "Skipping the middleman of the bar and just giving her the money".
I have no idea why I decided to live with these people (I found out about all this crazy **** after the tenancy agreement was already signed) and neither do my other friends, who are, thankfully, are normal and are on other courses.
As you can no doubt see, I am in a bit of a disgusting pickle, and I don't have any idea what to do, and what is the prime issue.
Help
Don't know many people that enjoy their course itself in its entirety atleast. No offence but doing good in your first year usually doesn't mean anything, if you're struggling start making use of the resources at hand. Some lecturers are bad it happens, ask them for any help you can and if not talk to someone higher up.in my eyes lecturers aren't supposed to teach per se but give you the tools to teach yourself most lectures for me involve not understanding until I go over it myself and going back if I have specific questions. As for your flatmates either suck it up or get someone to replace you, like it or not you're sharing with them you have no say in what goes on in their rooms as long as it doesn't damage the property.
Original post by DancingGroot
Don't know many people that enjoy their course itself in its entirety atleast.
I understand that not everything will be good, regardless of where I go. The problem is that I enjoy none of the course.
Original post by DancingGroot
if you're struggling start making use of the resources at hand.
I already do this. Why would I dump £9k a year and not do this?
Original post by DancingGroot
As for your flatmates either suck it up or get someone to replace you, like it or not you're sharing with them you have no say in what goes on in their rooms as long as it doesn't damage the property.
Again, fair enough.
I don't think that I made it clear what I was after. I am trying to ascertain the largest problem here so I can solve it and not be up the wall the entire time. It's not exactly me just *****ing like a small child. For instance, there is a lot of very serious family trouble going on as well for me, but I have determined that this isn't a major factor in this.
Well from my view It seems like you're asking whether you should try do something about your course or your flatmates as they are "problems" but I don't understand what you can do about either or why it matters whether one is more of an issue than the other. If you don't want to do your course anymore drop out. If you can't see yourself living with them anymore do something about it, no one can tell you what a bigger issue is because everyone has different opinions.
"I already do this. Why would I dump £9k a year and not do this?"
Well this is more of a we live in an information era where everything is online, you might think something is hard but just because someone that's a 4th year can't do something doesn't mean it's particularly hard. People must graduate from the course after all.
This might not be useful advice to you but I can't really understand what you accomplish by deciding which of your issues to worry about more . I don't see a prime issue I just see a culmination of things that might be too much for you to handle. Ask for professional help if you can't handle it mentally. Good luck
"I already do this. Why would I dump £9k a year and not do this?"
Well this is more of a we live in an information era where everything is online, you might think something is hard but just because someone that's a 4th year can't do something doesn't mean it's particularly hard. People must graduate from the course after all.
This might not be useful advice to you but I can't really understand what you accomplish by deciding which of your issues to worry about more . I don't see a prime issue I just see a culmination of things that might be too much for you to handle. Ask for professional help if you can't handle it mentally. Good luck
Original post by DancingGroot
Well from my view It seems like you're asking whether you should try do something about your course or your flatmates as they are "problems" but I don't understand what you can do about either or why it matters whether one is more of an issue than the other. If you don't want to do your course anymore drop out. If you can't see yourself living with them anymore do something about it, no one can tell you what a bigger issue is because everyone has different opinions.
"I already do this. Why would I dump £9k a year and not do this?"
Well, this is more of a we live in an information era where everything is online, you might think something is hard but just because someone that's a 4th year can't do something doesn't mean it's particularly hard. People must graduate from the course after all.
This might not be useful advice to you but I can't really understand what you accomplish by deciding which of your issues to worry about more. I don't see a prime issue I just see a culmination of things that might be too much for you to handle. Ask for professional help if you can't handle it mentally. Good luck
"I already do this. Why would I dump £9k a year and not do this?"
Well, this is more of a we live in an information era where everything is online, you might think something is hard but just because someone that's a 4th year can't do something doesn't mean it's particularly hard. People must graduate from the course after all.
This might not be useful advice to you but I can't really understand what you accomplish by deciding which of your issues to worry about more. I don't see a prime issue I just see a culmination of things that might be too much for you to handle. Ask for professional help if you can't handle it mentally. Good luck
I thought that was somewhat implicit in the question?
Okay, allow me to explain what I can do:
1) Change to another university on a different course. I thought that I basically said that in the second paragraph
2) Change to another university on the same course
3) I simply change accommodation
4) I do nothing and ride it out
Obviously, 2 are significantly larger than the other two, my judgment of which of those two issues is the prime one. I need help deciding which is likely the larger of the two so I can decide on which course of action would be most appropriate.
I am not just talking about a 4th year though. I am talking about somebody who has taken out a specialisation in that specific subject area, who you would expect to have a pretty decent level of expertise given that qualification, and yet cannot figure it out?
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