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24 year old rights

i'm a 24 year old girl, living with my dad for two years now since my mom died. its been a struggle the whole two years. seems to just keep getting worse and worse. im the only child and my mom was my bestfriend. i lived with her my whole life in new york while my dad lived in new jersey. my mom and my dad never had an ideal marriage. they divorced when i was 2 or 3 years old. since then i grew to dislike my dad because of his lack of effort to be in my life. i would see him once or twice a year, three times if i was lucky. . just to give you a little background information.. it all started when i moved in to my dads house after the funeral. immediately he gave me a curfew of 9:30pm, 10:00pm (i'm 23 years old at that time). so i tell him, at least make the curfew ressonable , im not a little girl im an adult and with my mom i never had a curfew because she trusted me because she knew me inside and out. besides the curfew, he would tell me how to dress, what to post and what not to post on my facebook account. if i posted something like "i miss my mom" he would demand i take it down. and dont post for a while after that. to speed up the story, im not a saint, so i do go out with friends sometimes and might a drink of wine while im out wiht them but he is against all things thats not christ-like. no smoking, no drinking, no cursing, but my MOMS side of the family is the complete opposite! so i grew up in that! so thats how i am! im not ratchet or anything but i like to consider myself as having street, and book smarts. ok anyways , the first really bad incedent was when i came home at around 12:00 when he told me to be in at 10:00. i came in, he grabbed me nd threw me on the couch, then grabbed my arm, pulled me into him with all his might and my mouth and cheek basically trying to open my mouth forcefully and yelled "were you drinking?!" , i didnt have one drink that night. i was sober. then when i tried to break free he continued to hold my mouth in a way i could not move until i started screaming for mercy. second incident, so this past week there was a christmas party and i went out with my friends had a couple drinks, not to the point where i was drunk though, just a little tipsy. i got in the house, my dad called me in the living room and i came, he told me to sit on the couch, he was still standing. he walked over to me , still standing over me like he was about to do something to me. he asked, "are you drunk?" i said, " no, but i had a few glasses of wine, dad". he then started yelling at me saying what did i tell you! no alchohol!! you are to do what i say when i say it!! no questions! i said okay. they he said, no, Dont talk back to me!! .. i said " i was just saying okay dad. " he then thought i had an attitude and told me to shut up. i then looked at him with disbelief and looked back down. i said i was sorry and asked if i could go to sleep then. he said, " no, your aunt is on her way over here ". i said " for what?" and he didnt answer... my aunt walks through the door with such a mean mug on her face asking me if i was drunk. at this point, im getting mad because now i feel threatened. i told her the same thing i told my father. she then too, came over and stood over me while im still sitting on the couch. while being questioned, i said , " look i apologize but i really dont think its a big deal and i would like to go to sleep now because i feel i didnt do anything wrong. " i then tried to get up... my aunt oushed me back down on the couch. she said dont move! i said why?? ?!.. then my dad grabbed my wrist and locked it in his hand so i couldnt go anywhere. then my aunt grabbed my other wrist and im trying to break loose and i cant and they are squeezing tighter and tighter on my wrists and its hurting the **** out of me and im screaming for deer life and my aunt then goes and grabs a box of TIssues!! and tries stuffing them in my mouth!! with all her might. at this point im LIVIDD!! so i start fighting back and trying to close my mouth so she cant oush the tissues in my mouth. they are sstill holding my wrists i am in pain and screaming and crying and they still wont let up. long strory short i calmed down just for the sake of if i was any more upset i would have passed out . i ended up going to bed after they let me go and the next morning i woke up with bruises on my wrists and my jaw was soar. as a matter of fact my wrists still hurt right now! this happened on saturday! and my wrists still havent healed yet. SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD DO. Also my dad would tell me stuff like " go in your room and be quiet.! "and "you cant leave the house u better not go anywhere ". mind you, im a grown woman, im 24 years old!!!

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Get a job and a place of your own, move out. Then he can’t tell you what to do and you can be an adult.

Reply 2

bones-mccoy

They've got absolutely no right to abuse you, no one has. His rules seem excessive, especially about how you dress and what you post online, but things like curfew etc you'll have less leeway over as you live in his house. Until you move out, he'll continue to control you.