Tuesday is a big student night in my city, so I went out with a couple of flatmates, at some point we met up with my flatmates boyfriend and his group of friends.
the group got seperated early one, so for most of the night it was just me, my flatmate, her boyfriend and a friend of his called "A".
I spoke to A through out the night, he was sort of hitting on me but nothing creepy or rude, I was just polite and showed normal level of interest in his stories.
I dont exactly remember but we agreed to a post night party at her boyfriends place. We got there drank abit more and I fell asleep on the sofa.
I woke up to find my heels taken off and "A" was touching my feet and smelling my feet. I was pretty freaked out and said what are you doing ? He said that I asked for a foot massage which doesnt sound like me.
It was around 6AM, so I got my stuff and left the apartment to go to my place.
I havnt mentioned the incident to anyone but its left me paranoid about what else he touched and going to other peoples place.
Should I report it to anyone ? the Uni ? my friend ? not sure what to do
If he did this for the purpose of sexual excitement, without your consent, then he has committed a sexual assault. It might seem trivial but it could escalate over time. You could speak with a female police specialist and let them decide how to proceed or not.
Lol that is pretty creepy haha. I mean, I'm very chilled about stuff so I personally wouldn't advise you to report it. I mean, it is hardly going to cause you any long-term damage. I think it's best to just forgive and forget minor stuff like that.
Up to you though.
The problem with fetishes like this is if he can't find a consenting adult he may well go looking for children. The more he gets away with it the more confident he'll become.
For crying out loud, let it go. Someone making you feel slightly uncomfortable is not a good reason to ruin their life.
If you have to ask whether you've been sexually assaulted then it did not happen. Move on. And don't fall asleep in random spaces.
I don't think it's worth reporting tbh,
yeah it's "weird"
but sniffing someone's feet is not a crime..........
Can't imagine the police getting very excited about this. I would start by telling him, directly or indirectly, that you didn't appreciate him touching you without consent.
You honestly think it's worth ruining someone's life over this?
Will you ever see him again? It obviously didn't traumatise you- just creeped you out. Understandably.
If you don't remember agreeing to a post-night party then how are you so confident in your ability to remember not agreeing to let him give you a foot massage. A lot of people do/say things that don't typically sound like them when they are drunk.
Understand I'm just playing Devil's advocate here as I see the argument that it's a fetish that could escalate if he doesn't understand why it's wrong to massage someone's feet non-consensually then it means he has no impulse control/empathy. But perhaps it was something he has never done before and woke up after drinking and felt silly? The implications of this are his whole life could be in the drain. Don't get me wrong, if he sexually assaulted you I wouldn't be saying this, but looking at it for what it is he literally just touched your feet.
Tbh you were drunk and have no witnesses so there's no point speaking to the police. I doubt the uni would do anything eitherwithout evidence. Might be worthmentioning it to your friend though as anyone with any self respect would ditch this guy asap. And certainly other people should be aware so they can keep themselves safe.