Should I a ask to change accommodation??

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lilly0499
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I’ve just finished my first sememster and I’m really finding it difficult to stay in the current flat I’m in. I live with 5 others who ever since freshers I just don’t seem to get along with and I hardly speak to them. They all get along so well and always leave me out of plans whenever they go out and have film nights in the kitchen etc even though I have tried to make an effort with them, they just don’t seem too interested. This has led to me not feeling comfortable in the flat and has led me to not want to go into the kitchen at all and always stay in my room, which causes me not to eat properly and for me to feel extremely lonely as all of my friends live in a flat together at a different accommodation. I have tried to speak to my halls officer about moving but she just shrugged it off and said that she can only offer a flat meeting to sort out issues, but I don’t feel like that is necessary. She then said to email residence life but I feel as though the situation would go straight back to her and they wouldn’t let me move based on the fact I don’t get along with my flatmates? Please help!! I don’t know what to do!!
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gjd800
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You can't spend your life running away from things that make you feel uncomfortable. Ask them what their problem is, do the mediation/meeting. You have to at least try.
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Bio 7
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(Original post by lilly0499)
I’ve just finished my first sememster and I’m really finding it difficult to stay in the current flat I’m in. I live with 5 others who ever since freshers I just don’t seem to get along with and I hardly speak to them. They all get along so well and always leave me out of plans whenever they go out and have film nights in the kitchen etc even though I have tried to make an effort with them, they just don’t seem too interested. This has led to me not feeling comfortable in the flat and has led me to not want to go into the kitchen at all and always stay in my room, which causes me not to eat properly and for me to feel extremely lonely as all of my friends live in a flat together at a different accommodation. I have tried to speak to my halls officer about moving but she just shrugged it off and said that she can only offer a flat meeting to sort out issues, but I don’t feel like that is necessary. She then said to email residence life but I feel as though the situation would go straight back to her and they wouldn’t let me move based on the fact I don’t get along with my flatmates? Please help!! I don’t know what to do!!
You sound identical to me, I don't go to my kitchen either to avoid them. I did ask earlier today to move to a studio and that will be done, which has made me feel a whole lot better.
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Blue_Cow
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(Original post by lilly0499)
I’ve just finished my first sememster and I’m really finding it difficult to stay in the current flat I’m in. I live with 5 others who ever since freshers I just don’t seem to get along with and I hardly speak to them. They all get along so well and always leave me out of plans whenever they go out and have film nights in the kitchen etc even though I have tried to make an effort with them, they just don’t seem too interested. This has led to me not feeling comfortable in the flat and has led me to not want to go into the kitchen at all and always stay in my room, which causes me not to eat properly and for me to feel extremely lonely as all of my friends live in a flat together at a different accommodation. I have tried to speak to my halls officer about moving but she just shrugged it off and said that she can only offer a flat meeting to sort out issues, but I don’t feel like that is necessary. She then said to email residence life but I feel as though the situation would go straight back to her and they wouldn’t let me move based on the fact I don’t get along with my flatmates? Please help!! I don’t know what to do!!
You're 18/19, and you're just going to have to toughen up a bit and just deal with it. Why is it making you not eat properly? Do they install metal gates on the kitchen entrance when they have their movie nights?
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Bio 7
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(Original post by gjd800)
You can't spend your life running away from things that make you feel uncomfortable. Ask them what their problem is, do the mediation/meeting. You have to at least try.
Sometimes running away from your problems works, as long as they never catch up.
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Bio 7
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(Original post by Blue_Cow)
You're 18/19, and you're just going to have to toughen up a bit and just deal with it. Why is it making you not eat properly? Do they install metal gates on the kitchen entrance when they have their movie nights?
He must not want to feel like he is intruding. I feel the same and haven't cooked in weeks.
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gjd800
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(Original post by Bio 7)
Sometimes running away from your problems works, as long as they never catch up.
Seldom true. Grow a set and sort things out.
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Blue_Cow
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(Original post by Bio 7)
He must not want to feel like he is intruding. I feel the same and haven't cooked in weeks.
Why? He pays as much rent as the rest of his flatmates - how is it intruding? It's only intruding if you don't have a backbone and aren't willing to stand up on your own two feet and use the facilities that you pay for.
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Bio 7
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(Original post by Blue_Cow)
Why? He pays as much rent as the rest of his flatmates - how is it intruding? It's only intruding if you don't have a backbone and aren't willing to stand up on your own two feet and use the facilities that you pay for.
Yeah well I tell myself that but such an introvert still feels out of place living with that many people.
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Blue_Cow
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(Original post by Bio 7)
Yeah well I tell myself that but such an introvert still feels out of place living with that many people.
I'm a CompSci student - you can't get more introverted than me. Just take control and do whatever it is you need to do in the kitchen. Assert authority.
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gjd800
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At some point in life you have to take the bull by the horns and at least have a go at sorting your own **** out. You will forever be a doormat if you don't. I know because I've been a doormat in the past.
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Bio 7
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(Original post by Blue_Cow)
I'm a CompSci student - you can't get more introverted than me. Just take control and do whatever it is you need to do in the kitchen. Assert authority.
Well I've moved away from my problem, nearly. The point is not everyone is competent enough to deal with these situations if they start out wrong.
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Blue_Cow
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(Original post by Bio 7)
Well I've moved away from my problem, nearly. The point is not everyone is competent enough to deal with these situations if they start out wrong.
But why not face it? If you think walking into a kitchen is awkward/intruding, then you're going to have a bit of trouble in the real world.
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Bio 7
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(Original post by Blue_Cow)
But why not face it? If you think walking into a kitchen is awkward/intruding, then you're going to have a bit of trouble in the real world.
It's just a different setting. Anyway I came here to offer OP support that they are not alone, not to be parented.
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TheJohnM
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(Original post by Blue_Cow)
You're 18/19, and you're just going to have to toughen up a bit and just deal with it. Why is it making you not eat properly? Do they install metal gates on the kitchen entrance when they have their movie nights?
The second part of your name describes you perfectly.
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Blue_Cow
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(Original post by TheJohnM)
The second part of your name describes you perfectly.
Hah. Very original.
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