The Student Room Group

Too fussy about men?

I was just wondering, does anyone else find themselves attracted to very few people, and often no-one at all, for long periods of time? Basically I hardly seem to fancy anyone, but it's not because I've consciously chosen to only fancy a certain type of person or anything like that, and I don't think myself 'in a different league' to most boys, I just see nearly all guys as friend material only.

My flatmate thinks this is strange, a view which is not helped by the fact that she fancies nearly everyone! She often says I'm 'too fussy' and that I should 'give people a chance', but the way I see it, if there's no physical attraction, why bother trying to get to know someone as more than a friend?

Scroll to see replies

That's true. I hardly ever find someone that I genuinely really like and am attracted to. I mean, yeah, I know when someone is good looking, but there aren't many people I'm properly attracted to.

Your friend's right in the way that people should be given a chance, but if you're not attracted to someone, what's the point in stringing them along? In some cases, people realise they're attracted to a friend who they didn't think they were attracted to before. This has never happened to me though.

Don't worry about it; everyone's different. You don't have to fancy everyone just because your friend does!
Reply 2
sometimes but for me its because i like one person more than others so end up comparing everyone else to them
Reply 3
I'm like this too, I think a lot of people are. My friends always tell me I'm too fussy but it's not that I'm only attracted to super-hot guys, in fact the few guys I've been out with or been really attracted to are fairly good-looking but not amazing. and like dh0001 i get really hung up on 1 person and compare others to them.

So long as you're happy, everything's fine :smile:
i was like that for ages - was beginning to think there was something wrong with me as i didnt find anyone i wanted to be with for 2 years... then i saw my boyfriend-to-be. =]
Reply 5
It's nice to know I'm not the only fussy one out there :biggrin: Just to clarify, it's not something that worries me, I was just curious as to who else out there felt attracted to very few people.
Who says we have to like someone at every moment in our life? I don't see the issue.
i am very fussy about girls. i am not the sort to just get with someone because they like me or they show an interest. a girl i really, really like comes along about once every 6 months
i am very fussy about girls. i am not the sort to just get with someone because they like me or they show an interest. a girl i really, really like comes along about once every 6 months
Reply 9
Yep, I'm the same! Have always been like it. It's not that I think I'm better than most guys or anything, it's just that I have to really "click" with someone before I go out with them. Sometimes guys can be really good looking/intelligent/witty etc but I still see them just as friends.
Yep. Same here. Out of about 50 guys, I'd find 1 or 2 attractive. I don't know why but I'm extremely picky.
NinaJenson
I was just wondering, does anyone else find themselves attracted to very few people, and often no-one at all, for long periods of time? Basically I hardly seem to fancy anyone, but it's not because I've consciously chosen to only fancy a certain type of person or anything like that, and I don't think myself 'in a different league' to most boys, I just see nearly all guys as friend material only.

My flatmate thinks this is strange, a view which is not helped by the fact that she fancies nearly everyone! She often says I'm 'too fussy' and that I should 'give people a chance', but the way I see it, if there's no physical attraction, why bother trying to get to know someone as more than a friend?

you're not on your own, i too suffer from this malady. i think in the past six months, i have found maybe one guy attractive. IN SIX MONTHS.

maybe youre friend is just easy where lads are concerned. no offence to your friend, but maybe being slightly discerning where boys are concerned is better than liking every guy in trousers!
I'm pretty much the same, I haven't actually fancied anyone in a while and if that 'thing' isn't there I don't really bother with it. It's not that I don't find people attractive because I do, that spark just hasn't been there and I guess I feel like there's no point trying to start something with someone when we just haven't clicked right away.
It doesn't help that the guys that make me flutter are usually cocky, arrogant plumbers/plasters etc and I go to uni so most of the guys there have more brains than I'm used to.

I have decided this year though to give more guys a chance and not push them away as soon as they show any interest, but yeh you're not alone!
xoxo_GossipGirl
I'm pretty much the same, I haven't actually fancied anyone in a while and if that 'thing' isn't there I don't really bother with it. It's not that I don't find people attractive because I do, that spark just hasn't been there and I guess I feel like there's no point trying to start something with someone when we just haven't clicked right away.
It doesn't help that the guys that make me flutter are usually cocky, arrogant plumbers/plasters etc and I go to uni so most of the guys there have more brains than I'm used to.

I have decided this year though to give more guys a chance and not push them away as soon as they show any interest, but yeh you're not alone!

you like macho men huh? :wink:

me, i like suits... yum, men in blue/black/ grey suits-----gorgeous :biggrin:
Reply 14
I'm the same. Currently, the person I like, I've liked for about 3.5 years or something stupid like that. (and I'm not even with him)
Titch89
I'm the same. Currently, the person I like, I've liked for about 3.5 years or something stupid like that. (and I'm not even with him)

bloody hell, that's ****. is he with someone eslse?
Reply 16
I don't think your fussy.

Your probably very smart, and don't want to end up with an absolute **** :smile:
I'm a bit fussy imo, I tend to feel a LOT of sexual attractions, but none that are coniderably genuine, as the sexual attractions have a tendency to die down after a couple of days
Reply 18
unfinished sympathy
bloody hell, that's ****. is he with someone eslse?


yes
ive only ever really fancied 3 girls that i've met and know.

given that i have met possibly hundreds of girls - i would say i am very very fussy