The Student Room Group

not ready for uni?

I'm sort of panicking about going to uni. I got an offer from oxford for this year and so I’m obviously going to take it because I really want to go there. I didn’t apply on deferred entry coz I didn’t think I’d get in this time and figured I’d take a gap year and reapply, so I’d got used to the idea of having a year out to basically grow up and do lots of stuff e.g. travelling, work experience, etc.

Now this change of plan means I’m just really scared. I don’t really feel adult or mature enough for uni. :s-smilie: I’m born in the middle of August, so I’ll only just be 18 when I start. I’ve been looking forward to uni for so long, but I know that 3 years will just fly by and I don’t want it to be a let-down because I’m not ready...

there's probably nothing anyone can say particularly cos I either go or I don't but just wanted to get it off my chest.. thanks for reading :smile:

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Don't worry yourself about it O.P.

There's probably hundreds of people just like you sitting there thinking "Oh dear. How will I cope with uni; I don't think I'm mature enough/I don't think I can live without my parents there all the time." etc

I'm probably on the fence. I think I could cope with uni, although the 'making new friends' bit seems a bit daunting (I'm sure that'll be fine though). What scares me more is that I'm applying for courses where I have to go abroad as a part of the course, and live miles away from anyone I know (and make new friends again...).

I think, over the course of this year, you'll probably mature more than you think. If not, then it doesn't make a massive difference. Not everyone in uni is going to be totally 110% mature (as much as you're going to Oxford).

I shall take this opportunity to say congrats on the Oxford entry, and "don't stress over uni". You'll go there, you'll make new friends, you'll join societies, and you'll drink copious fluids.

Think 'glass half full'. :smile:
Reply 2
Anonymous
I'm sort of panicking about going to uni. I got an offer from oxford for this year and so I’m obviously going to take it because I really want to go there. I didn’t apply on deferred entry coz I didn’t think I’d get in this time and figured I’d take a gap year and reapply, so I’d got used to the idea of having a year out to basically grow up and do lots of stuff e.g. travelling, work experience, etc.

Now this change of plan means I’m just really scared. I don’t really feel adult or mature enough for uni. :s-smilie: I’m born in the middle of August, so I’ll only just be 18 when I start. I’ve been looking forward to uni for so long, but I know that 3 years will just fly by and I don’t want it to be a let-down because I’m not ready...

there's probably nothing anyone can say particularly cos I either go or I don't but just wanted to get it off my chest.. thanks for reading :smile:


Well, you can always phone them and tell them your situation, maybe they might allow you to defer your entry as a result.

If not, go for it. Your going to Oxford, that should encourage you immensely.
fat_hobbit
Well, you can always phone them and tell them your situation, maybe they might allow you to defer your entry as a result.

If not, go for it. Your going to Oxford, that should encourage you immensely.

sammy can'r pm you. your box is too full.
Reply 4
It is totally normal to have panics about such a big change in your life. Everyone feels the same way now and again.
Only consider deferring if the panic and worry start to take over your life.
18 is quite old enough to be going, and you will grow up a lot in your time there. Being away from home has that effect wherever you are.
Honestly, I felt EXACTLY the same before uni, I cried myself to sleep quite a few times worrying about things changing but now Im here its the best thing I've ever done. it's been life-changing in a totally positive way :smile:
Reply 6
I feel the same, but I just keep telling myself that once I get there it's all going to be fine and that everyone else is in the same situation. Please don't stress about it! I bet loads of other people feel the same way too.

Oh and congrats on getting into Oxford :smile:
Reply 7
unfinished sympathy
sammy can'r pm you. your box is too full.


Hey :eviltongu

Deleted some messages. Should be able to do it now :smile:
fat_hobbit
Hey :eviltongu

Deleted some messages. Should be able to do it now :smile:

fanking yoooo :biggrin:
fat_hobbit
Hey :eviltongu

Deleted some messages. Should be able to do it now :smile:

fanking yoooo :biggrin:
Reply 10
Panicking over uni is so normal. Don't let it discourage you.
Before I went, I was worried sick. I was very immature, having had a totally shelter life at home where I never had to stand on my on two feet. Trust me, you get used to it so quickly.
You can see about deferring your entry if you really had your heart set on a gap year, but don't turn it down because you're scared. So many people are, and you really will be fine!
I went to uni at 18, and subsequently left after a week. I was born in June so I'm still not quite up there on the maturity with the rest of my classmates. I don't think I'm the uni type anyway...

If you're not sure, talk to your Uni and see if you can defer..
There'll be plenty of people who are in the same boat going to the same university as you so I'm sure you'll be fine. Keep in mind you'll need the same level of maturity to go travelling and working as you will need at university. Get yourself to university and you'll have an amazing time!! I do not jest.
eh?! By your reckoning ilora, if you're born june or later you're a lot less mature than someone born nearer the start of the year. Sounds like crap to me. I was born in June and have managed fine, there are people I know who were born later who are more mature than me and similarly people who were born earlier and are less mature than me. It's all subjective, a few months arent going to make a whole lot of difference.

I think leaving after a week is possibly a bit melodromatic, no offence. I was miserable at times during the first week and even more miserable the next 3 due to having my right leg in a full length cast but I stuck it out and now Im happy.

To the OP - of course any change is going to be difficult as you're being removed from your comfort zone but change can be a highly positive thing :smile:
Danielle89
eh?! By your reckoning ilora, if you're born june or later you're a lot less mature than someone born nearer the start of the year. Sounds like crap to me. I was born in June and have managed fine, there are people I know who were born later who are more mature than me and similarly people who were born earlier and are less mature than me. It's all subjective, a few months arent going to make a whole lot of difference.

I think leaving after a week is possibly a bit melodromatic, no offence. I was miserable at times during the first week and even more miserable the next 3 due to having my right leg in a full length cast but I stuck it out and now Im happy.

To the OP - of course any change is going to be difficult as you're being removed from your comfort zone but change can be a highly positive thing :smile:
Woah, you have a lot of opinions don't you! Perhaps if you had known a little more about my time at uni you'd think differently, but this thread isn't about me, it's about the OP. I was giving the OP another side of the story to think about, rather than the typical 'you'll be fine' response so many TSR users will use.
Some people just aren't the uni type, and I found that out after a huge financial commitment, emotional commitment and a physical commitment after moving into halls; paying rent, buying pots/pans/bedding.

All I'm saying, is that make sure you know who you are, and what you are capable of coping with, BEFORE you go the whole hog and move in. I've learned from my mistakes, and I know who I am because of it.
Dont worry ive yet to meet a mature person at uni, do whatever you feel like doing, but dont be worried about not being mature enough.
Your birthday middle of august? Mines 24th of aug, but i think that i will feel proper inadequate if i go to uni, even though ive applied to some of the easiest around!

basically i dont have confidence in myself really, whereas almighty Oxford think that you are perfectly capable of completing the course.
Reply 17
Anonymous
I'm sort of panicking about going to uni. I got an offer from oxford for this year and so I’m obviously going to take it because I really want to go there. I didn’t apply on deferred entry coz I didn’t think I’d get in this time and figured I’d take a gap year and reapply, so I’d got used to the idea of having a year out to basically grow up and do lots of stuff e.g. travelling, work experience, etc.

Now this change of plan means I’m just really scared. I don’t really feel adult or mature enough for uni. :s-smilie: I’m born in the middle of August, so I’ll only just be 18 when I start. I’ve been looking forward to uni for so long, but I know that 3 years will just fly by and I don’t want it to be a let-down because I’m not ready...

there's probably nothing anyone can say particularly cos I either go or I don't but just wanted to get it off my chest.. thanks for reading :smile:


Hey! I was actually quite relieved to read that somebody is feeling the same way as me! I don't feel mature or ready enough to go to Uni at all. I worry about it all the time, it keeps me up at night sometimes, but I just keep telling myself if I throw myself in there then I'll just adapt fine.

If it's any consolation, I'm born right at the very end of August, so I'll maybe only have been eighteen for a few days (guess it'll depend on which Uni!) when I start, so that terrifies me too. I'm not as mature as some of my friends, and that worries me a lot, but I guess you just learn to adapt to survive.

I keep entertaining the idea of having a year out, but then I'd want to travel. Thing is, I'd still be too scared to get out the front door and travel. I'd waste time wanting to spend it at home, and then come this time next year I'll be exactly the same as I am now. Might as well get it over with and get stuck in!!

So basically, I know how you feel, you're not alone, there's lots of others who feel the same too! If you want a year out then I bet it won't be too hard to do though

:smile:
All babies grow up... sometime.
Reply 19
i'll be 17 at least you can drink!what you going to be studying?we might meet!yay sorry i dont know anyone yet so PM i need a friend!lol dont worry uni makes you grow up i hope i go from being excited and cant wait to not wanting to leave school well more my friends but it always passes youve been at school for 6 years its time for something new and we wont start till october so plenty of time to grow up over the summer

xxx