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friends suddenly changed, and not for the better!

two of my friends have been excluding me recently, it ranges from petty things like going out for lunch together (which they'd normally invite me to) and 'secret' discussions about where they're going to together over the weekend. they do this right infront of me and in a way that is like they're talking loudly, obviously wanting me to hear, but keeping what they say vague, almost like they want me to ask what's going on so that they can say 'oh...nothing'.

this has been going on for a while now, and i really don't understand why. they also make jokes towards me right infront of me which are obviously malicious but they try to pass off as friendly chat.

i really don't want to have to talk to them about it although i know that's what the consensus of advice will be. i guess i'm just searching for other people who have been in this situation who can tell me how they got over it, eg, ignore them, they're not worth it etc.

some of you may be in the same situation, i'm sure this happens to loads of girls at some point. it may sound petty but you can't really appreciate how upsetting and horrible it is unless you're in the situation :redface:

all replies appreciated.

Reply 1

tiger_vio

This happened to me when i was in a group of 3 friends from aged about 13-16. It isn't nice at all, but I have much better friends now. I don't see them much now, but when I do they still brag about what they're up too- and tbh I think it's just jealousy. OP, my guess is your friends are insecure and are putting you down to boost their self-esteem. I would say 'get new friends', but I know thats easier said than done, plus i'd be being hypocritical seeing as when I was in the situation I stayed with them. Good luck!

Reply 2

dh00001

you said it yourself; the only way to find out is to say something. its not easy but we cant tell you the reasons for this

Reply 3

uno

I know the feeling - and its horrible i agree! Girls can be so nasty some times. I guess people are probably right to advise talking to them about it but to be honest if i was you i dunno if i'd be brave enough.. I do think tho that they probably dont realise that its getting to you/dont mean to hurt you really or just arent thinking how it looks to you. The situation could so easily change as well, like if they had a argument one of them would come to you about it.... Theres no point worrying too much about it tho as it'll probably blow over without them even realising and you will find better friends eventually!
Hope it all works out okay for you

Reply 4

goldenbuttons

yeah, whenever one of them's not around they're totally normal, and i think things have improved, then they're together again and it appears they just feed off eachother :rolleyes:

Reply 5

suicidal_dream

thats happened to me before... i was in year 7 or something and one of the girls i was supposedly friends with, decided she didnt like me and didnt think the rest of my friends should either, so she kept trying to leave me out of stuff n make me really paranoid..

Hopefully they'll get bored of it soon!

Reply 6

tomoli

Don't rise to the bait. If they seem like they don't want to do anything with you, then don't make an effort. Distance yourself from them and then see how they react. Or thats what I would do anyway...

Reply 7

goldenbuttons

thanks to everyone who has replied.

tomoli that's what i intend on doing, but then i know i'll get the 'oh why are you being funny with us?' line.

ah well, i know i should probably talk to them but it's just so much effort for people i don't really like and couldn't care if we're friends anymore or not - that's my conclusion!

Reply 8

Arnie Pie In The Sky

It's probably because you've done something over the past weeks/months that they don't like. Or maybe they've heard something you may have done. Laughing straight at you is not friendly. Stick with them but don't get too attached. If they invite you out for lunch say no so that'll show you don't need them. Get better friends they seem to be like idiots.

:smile: