Cant move out to uni because....

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Anonymous #1
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My mum will be alone if I do
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Ray_Shadows
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it's the hardest thing a man can do
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sexilexi
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It's sad but it's necessary sadly
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by tinycharlie)
It's sad but it's necessary sadly
2 of my unis (London) I can commute to , and I feel like she doesnt want me to move out.

Idk what to do
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sexilexi
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How long is the commute? Are the universities as prestigious as the ones you would have to move out for?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by tinycharlie)
How long is the commute? Are the universities as prestigious as the ones you would have to move out for?
UCL I can commute to fine, the uni I would have to move out for is a top 20 in UK but not as prestiege as UCL
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sexilexi
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So just go to UCL, problem solved... It's anyways more prestigious and you'd be at home and in London.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by tinycharlie)
So just go to UCL, problem solved... It's anyways more prestigious and you'd be at home and in London.
I am worried I will be missing out on the "student experience"
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happyy
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My mum will be alone if I do
I had to leave my mum alone as well, and it turned out fine. It will force your mum to find more things to do, encourage her to starts something new if she is lonely. You can visit more frequently at the beginning when you first move out and gradually make it a more realistic visiting pattern. Don't limit yourself. I don't think many parents want there children to move out, but don't let her guilt trip you into missing out on an amazing experience.
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Tiger Rag
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Talk to your mum.

You'll have to move out eventually.
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sexilexi
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You won't be missing out on anything... You only have a few more years to be with your mother before you will have to move out and get a job etc... Is getting drunk every night in your cramped student dorm worth it to not see your mother?
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Future_Surgeon
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The 'student experience' is overrated. Nonetheless, you don't want to be one those sadcases who stays at home far longer than they should, even though they have the ability to move out. Also, you're your mother's child, not her friend. If she's going to get lonely then she should make the effort to go resolve that loneliness.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I am worried I will be missing out on the "student experience"
The "student experience" is really overrated. It is nice to live independently, but you will be mostly surrounded by people who drink to get wasted and want multiple short-lived relationships because they are "the adults" now. I've lost count of the amount of times I had to contact someone and complain about my flatmates as the possibility of having to pay fines seems to be the only working method to get people to act decently.

They say uni is the time to learn how to take care of yourself... most of the people can neither cook nor clean, and they are not willing to improve. At some point, I had to teach one girl how to peel potatoes. The other guys don't know how to iron clothes, so they just wear them straight out of the washing machine.

I may come across as bitter, but this has been my experience so far. My friends who study at different unis had similar complaints, in fact, the internet is flooded with articles and posts about unbearable flatmates.

You can still make friends, join societies and take part in events while living at home. These will make your university experience worthwhile, plus you will save money, energy and time.
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AstroNandos
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I am worried I will be missing out on the "student experience"
Seems like the best compromise tbh. You can always have a night out and stay round a mates, but the student experience isn't all that it's made out to be imo

But as someone has already said, soon you'll be getting a job and your life will start to move on so it's only a matter of time
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RVNmax
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I am worried I will be missing out on the "student experience"
I think you'll find a lot of people staying at home at the London unis.

But I would suggest talking to your mother about it regardless. I'm in a similar situation post uni, but with additional factors which is why I'm not moving out just yet. This topic won't go away so you are going to need to be open with her about it and also get her feeling as well as maybe she doesn't mind that much. Speaking to her now will at least prepare her for the inevitable even if you decide to stay at home for now.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by AstroNandos)
Seems like the best compromise tbh. You can always have a night out and stay round a mates, but the student experience isn't all that it's made out to be imo

But as someone has already said, soon you'll be getting a job and your life will start to move on so it's only a matter of time
I think she expects me to stay with her forever
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by RVNmax)
I think you'll find a lot of people staying at home at the London unis.

But I would suggest talking to your mother about it regardless. I'm in a similar situation post uni, but with additional factors which is why I'm not moving out just yet. This topic won't go away so you are going to need to be open with her about it and also get her feeling as well as maybe she doesn't mind that much. Speaking to her now will at least prepare her for the inevitable even if you decide to stay at home for now.
I also think there are some cultural factors, as a parent she probably thinks ill become an alcholic which may be true but I still would like to experience living with other students
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Airmed
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I think she expects me to stay with her forever
That's selfish of her. In the end, you're an adult and you have to make your own way in the world. Besides, you can always visit her and she can visit you.
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Trinculo
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I think she expects me to stay with her forever
How far from UCL do you live?
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adamantacademic
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My mum will be alone if I do
Stick with your Mum, you'll regret it once she kicks the bucket!
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Besides you wouldn't be missing out anything, UCL is a highly prestigious uni and in recent days is growing an international rep. Plus you'll be surrounded with like-minded commuters and the social aspect would be present for this reason!
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