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DayneD89
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B1314 - Sprouts Bill 2018, Hon. CountBrandenburg



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Sprouts Bill 2018

A Bill to cease sponsorship, funding and influence from Brussels and the European Union on advertisements on UK media.




BE IT ENACTED by The Queen's most Excellent Majesty, by and with the advice and consent of the Commons in this present Parliament assembled, in accordance with the provisions of the Parliament Acts 1911 and 1949, and by the authority of the same, as follows:-

1: Definitions

(1) Sprouts: refers to Brussel Sprouts
(2) Brussels: this will be used interchangeably with the European Union, as it is the administrative centre of the Union.
(3) EU: the abbreviation for the European Union
(4) Brexit: the process in which the United Kingdom leaves its status as an EU member state.
(5) Festive season: this refers to the time period beginning at 00:00 on the first Sunday of Advent of a year and ending at 23:59 on the 6th January immediately following this date.

2: Advertisements

(1) No advertisement may be aired on TV should it have received funding directly from Brussels, or any department of the EU, or if it is a part of an EU project.
-(i) the advertisement may be allowed to air if made in collaboration with another party that has received less than 20% of the total funding required to produce the advert from Brussels.
-(ii) if the above clause applies, the advertisement must make it clear that a part of the production was funded by Brussels.
(2) Websites with their domain registered within the United Kingdom, British Overseas Territories or the Crown Dependencies, are hereby prohibited from utilising anti-Brexit sentiments – including advocacy of a second referendum until at least 20 years have passed from when this bill comes into effect- and the promotion of EU projects.
(3) The BBC is hereby prohibited from producing any media relating to the EU, except when the media is a work of fiction and does not undermine the efforts of the Referendum campaign of 2016 and the negotiations for Brexit – until 20 years have passed from when this Bill comes into effect.
- (i) if the piece of media is produced with this, there must be a noticeable disclaimer that the BBC is not trying to enforce a particular point of view, in order for the organisation to maintain impartiality.


3. Sprouts renaming

(1) Spouts will no longer be allowed to be called Brussel Sprouts in all advertisements, media and packaging.
-(i) failure to follow this will result in a fine equal to 5% of the production cost, and 10% during the festive season.

4: Commencement, Short Title, Extent and Conditions

(1) This bill shall come into force at 11pm on 29th March 2019, the date set for the United Kingdom’s withdrawal from the EU.
-(i) This date may be changed subject to any changes in negotiations/ (2) This bill may be cited as the Sprouts Bill 2018.
(3) This bill extends to the United Kingdom.

Spoiler:
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Notes

From the time we leave the EU, the federalised system of the EU will be considered foreign to our nation. Therefore, in order to remain without influence from foreign powers, we must restrict the influence of the EU on all media, allowing for the chance of British based projects to prosper. In order to uphold this ideal, the renaming of Sprouts is quite necessary to avoid any indirect references to the EU.



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Connor27
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Aye. A great bill.
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username1524603
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This bill might be intended as a joke but there are parts I agree with, the EU should not be allowed to donate money to advertising on British TV. The point should be covered in a bill about EU funding of companies where companies receiving funding from the EU should not be allowed to have a say on Brexit.
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Aph
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Ummmm how about no?
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CoffeeAndPolitics
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Nay. This is a ridiculous bill regarding ceasing "sponsorship, funding and influence from Brussels and the European Union on advertisements on UK media" and how we can't say Brussel Sprouts is Brussel Sprouts. Frankly I don't get what the fuss is all about.

"A Bill to cease sponsorship, funding and influence from Brussels and the European Union on advertisements on UK media." - The word "bill" shouldn't be capitalised.

"(1) Spouts will no longer be allowed to be called Brussel Sprouts in all advertisements, media and packaging." - There is a typo here. I think you meant sprouts instead of "spouts".
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CountBrandenburg
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(Original post by CoffeeAndPolitics)
Nay. This is a ridiculous bill regarding ceasing "sponsorship, funding and influence from Brussels and the European Union on advertisements on UK media" and how we can't say Brussel Sprouts is Brussel Sprouts. Frankly I don't get what the fuss is all about.

"A Bill to cease sponsorship, funding and influence from Brussels and the European Union on advertisements on UK media." - The word "bill" shouldn't be capitalised.

"(1) Spouts will no longer be allowed to be called Brussel Sprouts in all advertisements, media and packaging." - There is a typo here. I think you meant sprouts instead of "spouts".
I apologise for the spelling mistake, an oversight on my part and same with the capitalisation of bill.
I believe that effective measures should be put in place to ensure in the aftermath of our withdrawal from the EU, that such an system will now be considered a foreign entity to us, it is important to limit the control they can have on other means; directly or otherwise. I believe they can subtly influence the population through media and it would go against our sovereignty if they continue to do so, since by all intents and purposes, the EU is a foreign government.
As for Brussel Sprouts, the similarities between the names can be seen as an indirect indication of the control Brussels has over us, and in order to maintain transparency and for the sake of a more free society, that name must be changed...


I’m sure you must have guessed the Sprouts part is the joke ( not the greatest I admit) of the bill, and is only there for a name for my first bill.
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JMR2020.
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Yeah...
I usually vote No on all joke bills.
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TCFactor
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Ay. Was supposed to be a joint submission. Voting Aye still tho.
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CountBrandenburg
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(Original post by TCFactor)
Ay. Was supposed to be a joint submission. Voting Aye still tho.
Sorry mate, I did ask for your name to be put on as a Seconder, as unnecessary as that sounds but it doesn’t matter in the long run I think?
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WobblyBovine
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(Original post by Connor27)
Aye. A great bill.
I assume you’re being sarcastic, since you just railed on me for supporting the Education Indoctrination bill.
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Connor27
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(Original post by JellyMilk)
I assume you’re being sarcastic, since you just railed on me for supporting the Education Indoctrination bill.
Yes, this is a clearly a joke bill as Count stated.
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04MR17
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Might abstain. Might not. No strong opinions either way right now.
(Original post by CoffeeAndPolitics)
"(1) Spouts will no longer be allowed to be called Brussel Sprouts in all advertisements, media and packaging." - There is a typo here. I think you meant sprouts instead of "spouts".
Aw I was really looking forward to getting rid of Brussel Spouts...:getmecoat:
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CoffeeAndPolitics
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(Original post by 04MR17)
Might abstain. Might not. No strong opinions either way right now.
Aw I was really looking forward to getting rid of Brussel Spouts...:getmecoat:
I personally hate Brussel Sprouts having tried them before. This bill also seems to be a joke as well and I will be voting against this.
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04MR17
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(Original post by CoffeeAndPolitics)
I personally hate Brussel Sprouts having tried them before. This bill also seems to be a joke as well and I will be voting against this.
It's 50/50 joke serious which makes it harder to judge. On a more important level, what's wrong with Sprouts?! They're gorgeous I had some this evening....:coma:
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username1524603
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(Original post by 04MR17)
It's 50/50 joke serious which makes it harder to judge. On a more important level, what's wrong with Sprouts?! They're gorgeous I had some this evening....:coma:
Crunching down on a sloppy, testicle-shaped fart bomb does not make for a good dining experience.
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CountBrandenburg
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(Original post by CoffeeAndPolitics)
I personally hate Brussel Sprouts having tried them before. This bill also seems to be a joke as well and I will be voting against this.
I on the contrary like Sprouts, and would like to remove any indirect reference to the administrative centre of the EU if possible from my favourite vegetable most commonly enjoyed during Christmastide.
I shall reiterate, the Sprouts section is a joke ( though for all intents for the bill I probably wouldn’t remove it) and I have submitted it as a private member’s bill because I would not like my party to be associated with it. Also I genuinely think that to promote British projects, EU influence should be prohibited from British media immediately after our withdrawal. In hindsight, it may be a very specific issue ( or a non issue for most members I think)
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04MR17
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(Original post by Jacob E)
Crunching down on a sloppy, testicle-shaped fart bomb does not make for a good dining experience.
I'm sorry to hear about your dental work.:console:
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Scisaac
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NAY. Seems like a load of tripe to me
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Saracen's Fez
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They are Brussels sprouts with an 's', for a start.

It's all a bit freedom fries / liberty cabbage, isn't it?
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CountBrandenburg
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(Original post by Saracen's Fez)
They are Brussels sprouts with an 's', for a start.

It's all a bit freedom fries / liberty cabbage, isn't it?
All the more reason for the associated to be removed and to gain independence from an oppressive EU by limiting their foreign influence in our gracious nation right?
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