The Student Room Group

friends dont even acknowledge me anyore

It started when I got a part time job during christmas. Instead of congratulating me, they all asked me why I'd want a job during sixth form, however after finding out how much I'd get paid they suddenly wanted to apply.
During my job, I hardly saw them as I would leave early if I only had frees for the rest of the day (frees which I used to hang out w them in) so when i did see them i used to be super excited but whenever id speak theyd either cut me off, ignore me or look bored. eventually i just didnt bother speaking and when i didnt it would be super awkward bc theyd look at me as if something was wrong.

Then they started making comments about how they never see me anymore or that i they dont know whats going on in my life anymore to which i never used to say anything to. maybe they didnt liike how i had things going on in my life or that i wasnt oversharing anymore they act super different now that we're in sixth form (we went secondary school together) and pretend to act ditsy or laugh at really random things to make friends now and i dont mind the group we're a part of now but it feels a bit impersonal and fake. sometimes i hang out with other people but more often than not i do sit with them even if it means they dont speak/listen to me properly or im ignored altogether.

i know i should maybe get new friends but a part of me feels so anxious that i dont know what to do or whether to give it some time seeing as i've known them for 6 years i just need advice
its a difficult problem this. I wouldn't cut them off but I think perhaps try and make an effort to get back to being good friends with them, perhaps by speaking to a couple of people individually rather than as a group. At the same time, don't neglect other friendships. Sometimes, well often, in life friendships just end and there isn't really a dramatic reason for it. I wouldn't get too concerned and if attempts to rekindle the friendship fail, then just try and find new ones. Don't resent them, stay on good terms and now you've got two groups of friends. My advice would be to make an effort to repair the friendship and at the same time try and pursue new ones. Pick whichever makes you feel better or hold onto both. After you leave sixth form these friendships more than likely won't last so it's honestly not as big of a deal as it feels at the moment. This kind of thing just happens and its important to try and move on from it... its natural, try not to overthink it!
Let me know how it goes. All the best!
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
its a difficult problem this. I wouldn't cut them off but I think perhaps try and make an effort to get back to being good friends with them, perhaps by speaking to a couple of people individually rather than as a group. At the same time, don't neglect other friendships. Sometimes, well often, in life friendships just end and there isn't really a dramatic reason for it. I wouldn't get too concerned and if attempts to rekindle the friendship fail, then just try and find new ones. Don't resent them, stay on good terms and now you've got two groups of friends. My advice would be to make an effort to repair the friendship and at the same time try and pursue new ones. Pick whichever makes you feel better or hold onto both. After you leave sixth form these friendships more than likely won't last so it's honestly not as big of a deal as it feels at the moment. This kind of thing just happens and its important to try and move on from it... its natural, try not to overthink it!
Let me know how it goes. All the best!

thank you so much just knowng some is listening makes me feel a bit better, a few people have said that theyre probably jealous/theyre just despearate to look popular and dont like that i do my own thing sometimes but idk ill definitely try with making new friends, its just sad how poeple change to fit in and forget about those who've always been there
Original post by Anonymous
thank you so much just knowng some is listening makes me feel a bit better, a few people have said that theyre probably jealous/theyre just despearate to look popular and dont like that i do my own thing sometimes but idk ill definitely try with making new friends, its just sad how poeple change to fit in and forget about those who've always been there


Up until upper sixth, I had a group of friends who I was with from year 7. At the end of year 11 a few couple of people left and the group kind of drifted away a bit. Most of the group stayed close friends to each other but I felt kind of outside it. I stayed on good terms with them, am still reasonably close to one or two of them but never really felt like part of the group. In upper sixth, I pretty much ended up as part of a different friend group because I actively tried to. It was a bit weird because I wasnt really in on how they meet up and wasnt invited to lots of the outside school things partly because I wasnt that keen and mostly because I was the newcomer. I've left high school now and am only in touch with one person from the original group but several from the new group, even meeting up with them occasionally after sixth form. Though even this group has kind of fell apart because everyone has gone their own ways and about 1/2 of the people basically left the group through lack of contact. You'll find that all these friendships are temporary. As you move through life, they'll come and go. You might find one or two which actually make you happy and you can hold onto them but apart from that, most of the time it'll just be moving on from one to the next.
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
Up until upper sixth, I had a group of friends who I was with from year 7. At the end of year 11 a few couple of people left and the group kind of drifted away a bit. Most of the group stayed close friends to each other but I felt kind of outside it. I stayed on good terms with them, am still reasonably close to one or two of them but never really felt like part of the group. In upper sixth, I pretty much ended up as part of a different friend group because I actively tried to. It was a bit weird because I wasnt really in on how they meet up and wasnt invited to lots of the outside school things partly because I wasnt that keen and mostly because I was the newcomer. I've left high school now and am only in touch with one person from the original group but several from the new group, even meeting up with them occasionally after sixth form. Though even this group has kind of fell apart because everyone has gone their own ways and about 1/2 of the people basically left the group through lack of contact. You'll find that all these friendships are temporary. As you move through life, they'll come and go. You might find one or two which actually make you happy and you can hold onto them but apart from that, most of the time it'll just be moving on from one to the next.


its nice to know im not alone in this situation it do you have any tips on how to cope with it, i just feel like absolute sh*t whenever i go to college even though i know i shouldnt. ive decided im going to just say hi to them in hallways and speak to them if they speak to me but i need to stop falling back into the loop of me running after them and make the effort but its just easier said than done

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