The Student Room Group

My crush has a girlfriend, FFS

Ok so i KNOW it’s wrong that I’m even considering him whilst he’s in a relationship, but hear me out.

Around just over a month ago, he confessed that he liked me, but we didn’t pursue anything because I didn’t want a relationship as I’m just in sixth form (which he knew).

Since then I realised I actually do have feelings for him and was going to tell him this. I told my friend what I was going to do, to which she told me he JUST got into a relationship, less than two weeks ago (which I did a bit of stalking (lmao) and is true).

However, he told a mutual friend of ours that he still likes me. People in my sixth form have a tendency to stay in relationships just to say that they’re in one and not bc they have genuine feelings, and I think that’s the situation with his new girlfriend.

Would I be a total ***** to tell him how I feel?

Scroll to see replies

Just think about him, because what if he really likes this girl? Maybe they’re happy as they are now so it wouldn’t be nice to break that up. If they’re not together because they like each other then they’re gonna break up eventually anyways, then you can have your chance
Normally I would say leave it alone, but if it's only been two weeks and you're absolutely sure about how you feel, go and get your man. It's very recent, and I can't help but feel you might regret it if you don't tell him. They may or may not break up naturally but it'll be his decision to make if you tell him how you feel, not yours.
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so i KNOW it’s wrong that I’m even considering him whilst he’s in a relationship, but hear me out.

Around just over a month ago, he confessed that he liked me, but we didn’t pursue anything because I didn’t want a relationship as I’m just in sixth form (which he knew).

Since then I realised I actually do have feelings for him and was going to tell him this. I told my friend what I was going to do, to which she told me he JUST got into a relationship, less than two weeks ago (which I did a bit of stalking (lmao) and is true).

However, he told a mutual friend of ours that he still likes me. People in my sixth form have a tendency to stay in relationships just to say that they’re in one and not bc they have genuine feelings, and I think that’s the situation with his new girlfriend.

Would I be a total ***** to tell him how I feel?


Forget him he's taken

Original post by FairySparkleGirl
Normally I would say leave it alone, but if it's only been two weeks and you're absolutely sure about how you feel, go and get your man. It's very recent, and I can't help but feel you might regret it if you don't tell him. They may or may not break up naturally but it'll be his decision to make if you tell him how you feel, not yours.


And how would you feel if you were on the receiving end of this, not very nice is it.
Original post by Rock Fan
Forget him he's taken



And how would you feel if you were on the receiving end of this, not very nice is it.

Receiving end of what? It's only been two weeks and they have a history. It's up to the OP and the guy what happens.
Original post by FairySparkleGirl
Receiving end of what? It's only been two weeks and they have a history. It's up to the OP and the guy what happens.


He has a girlfriend already, and my point is how would you feel if you had a boyfriend and he was chatting up someone else?
Original post by FairySparkleGirl
Receiving end of what? It's only been two weeks and they have a history. It's up to the OP and the guy what happens.


It’s usually at the beginning of a relationship when people have the exciting bits
he's taken , move on plz
Original post by TheMythicalBeast
Just think about him, because what if he really likes this girl? Maybe they’re happy as they are now so it wouldn’t be nice to break that up. If they’re not together because they like each other then they’re gonna break up eventually anyways, then you can have your chance


If she tells him how she feels and that guy does really like his girlfriend over her, then he will just refuse her right and they both move on. If not, then he's not keeping that girlfriend in a relationship that was bound to go no where.
I think you should tell him how you feel and not become rueful if he refuses you. But if he does say he wants to be with you instead, don't let him until he breaks up with his girlfriend first. At least she won't get cheated on.
Definitely tell him!!!
Original post by Rock Fan
He has a girlfriend already, and my point is how would you feel if you had a boyfriend and he was chatting up someone else?

Nobody's chatting anybody up. I think you're going way over the top here. Two weeks is very recent, and she knows the guy. Ordinarily I would say leave it alone, but this is something she has to decide. He may well turn her down, but can she move on if she never tells him is all I'm asking? For the sake of two weeks.
Original post by YouMadBro!
If she tells him how she feels and that guy does really like his girlfriend over her, then he will just refuse her right and they both move on. If not, then he's not keeping that girlfriend in a relationship that was bound to go no where.
I think you should tell him how you feel and not become rueful if he refuses you. But if he does say he wants to be with you instead, don't let him until he breaks up with his girlfriend first. At least she won't get cheated on.

I agree with you. No cheating, just a conversation 👍🏻
Original post by FairySparkleGirl
Nobody's chatting anybody up. I think you're going way over the top here. Two weeks is very recent, and she knows the guy. Ordinarily I would say leave it alone, but this is something she has to decide. He may well turn her down, but can she move on if she never tells him is all I'm asking? For the sake of two weeks.


Personally it is the wrong thing to do persuing him when he is in a relationship, so would you chase after someone who is already in a relationship? just saying...
Original post by YouMadBro!
If she tells him how she feels and that guy does really like his girlfriend over her, then he will just refuse her right and they both move on. If not, then he's not keeping that girlfriend in a relationship that was bound to go no where.
I think you should tell him how you feel and not become rueful if he refuses you. But if he does say he wants to be with you instead, don't let him until he breaks up with his girlfriend first. At least she won't get cheated on.


I feel like that’s just mixing things up though... if she really likes him she can wait. And often guys don’t break up with their girlfriends anyway like that :/ would be easier to just wait
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so i KNOW it’s wrong that I’m even considering him whilst he’s in a relationship, but hear me out.

Around just over a month ago, he confessed that he liked me, but we didn’t pursue anything because I didn’t want a relationship as I’m just in sixth form (which he knew).

Since then I realised I actually do have feelings for him and was going to tell him this. I told my friend what I was going to do, to which she told me he JUST got into a relationship, less than two weeks ago (which I did a bit of stalking (lmao) and is true).

However, he told a mutual friend of ours that he still likes me. People in my sixth form have a tendency to stay in relationships just to say that they’re in one and not bc they have genuine feelings, and I think that’s the situation with his new girlfriend.

Would I be a total ***** to tell him how I feel?


Thinking that you can be in long term relationship when in 6th Form is like having had an engagement at age 6 to your next door neighbor.
Original post by TheMythicalBeast
I feel like that’s just mixing things up though... if she really likes him she can wait. And often guys don’t break up with their girlfriends anyway like that :/ would be easier to just wait


But how long do you wait, yes most do break up at a young age but there's always that one relationship that goes on for a long time, I have known people get married when they have been together since their teen years.
Original post by Rock Fan
Personally it is the wrong thing to do persuing him when he is in a relationship, so would you chase after someone who is already in a relationship? just saying...

I wouldn't call two weeks a full on relationship just yet, and where there is a history like this it isn't so clear cut. Would I pursue a guy I didn't know if he was with someone whether it was two days, two weeks or longer? No, I'm not like that. But if I were in the OP's situation, and it was literally five minutes ago that he met someone, I might feel differently. On the receiving end if he chooses the OP? I might be hurt but I'd understand the situation, he's free to choose, and it's only been two weeks, I'd hardly be married to the guy ☺️
Original post by Rock Fan
But how long do you wait, yes most do break up at a young age but there's always that one relationship that goes on for a long time, I have known people get married when they have been together since their teen years.

My parents - 14 and 16. Still together. Which is why I think the OP should at least tell him while things are still very recent and before they get serious. She may regret it, and he might too.
Original post by Rock Fan
But how long do you wait, yes most do break up at a young age but there's always that one relationship that goes on for a long time, I have known people get married when they have been together since their teen years.


Yeah but then again, if that’s the case with them then how likely is it that she’s still gonna like him in a couple years time? If she still does, clearly it needs addressing
Original post by FairySparkleGirl
My parents - 14 and 16. Still together. Which is why I think the OP should at least tell him while things are still very recent and before they get serious. She may regret it, and he might too.


Well he better be honest with the other girl if he is not that into her because if he is into her then as you said further up he will reject the OP.

Quick Reply

Latest