My boyfriend has a tumblr to look at nude girls

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emmythompson17
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I'd like some advice.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 months, we are so happy, we are going on holiday together twice this year, we love to spend as much time together as possible and it is a really healthy, loving relationship.

A few months ago, when me and my boyfriend had been clubbing with some friends we came back together and were looking at the photos from the night on his phone, he crashed out and I was still on his phone, which isn't an issue we know each other's passcode and everything so.

When I was looking at the pictures I saw a photo which must have been from a few days or week earlier, and it was a screenshot of something off tumblr, I can't quite remember it now.

And I thought lol he has a tumblr.

So I know I shouldnt have, but I had had a drink (I know it's no excuse) so I typed in tumblr on his phone and the app came up.

On there I saw that he followed a few like porn tumblrs, and tumblrs where couples post pictures of themselves having sex etc. Basically sex tumblrs. I was so shocked, and didn't really know how to feel at first.
I then saw that he had messaged two instagrams asking if they trade, I'm guessing he meant nudes and this really REALLY shook me.
Asking a girl for nudes who isn't your girlfriend just isn't okay.

And I have questioned all of this ever since, because most boys watch porn. Girlfriend or not, but what gets me about tumblr is how intimate it is, it gives you access to actually connect with these people, unlike pornhub or whatever.

I thought to myself, tomorrow I am going to bring it up, but when it came to it I just couldn't. I felt so bad for snooping and almost felt like that cancelled off what he had done.

But now that a few months have passed I've became obsessive, checking his tumblr all the time (he never likes or reblogs anything), and see who he's following, it actually says when he's active and this makes me feel sick. And it has also made me check the app if he stays over or whatever, and he hasn't send any messages since those two that he sent all those months ago. So he's merely just looking.

I know I did wrong snooping, but I've been torturing myself for months, and it is something that really bothers me so I know I need to bring it up to him. But how do we go from here? Trust from both sides has been played upon and I honestly don't know what to say.

If anyone has any advice let me know
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username47781
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
I'd like some advice.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 months, we are so happy, we are going on holiday together twice this year, we love to spend as much time together as possible and it is a really healthy, loving relationship.

A few months ago, when me and my boyfriend had been clubbing with some friends we came back together and were looking at the photos from the night on his phone, he crashed out and I was still on his phone, which isn't an issue we know each other's passcode and everything so.

When I was looking at the pictures I saw a photo which must have been from a few days or week earlier, and it was a screenshot of something off tumblr, I can't quite remember it now.

And I thought lol he has a tumblr.

So I know I shouldnt have, but I had had a drink (I know it's no excuse) so I typed in tumblr on his phone and the app came up.

On there I saw that he followed a few like porn tumblrs, and tumblrs where couples post pictures of themselves having sex etc. Basically sex tumblrs. I was so shocked, and didn't really know how to feel at first.
I then saw that he had messaged two instagrams asking if they trade, I'm guessing he meant nudes and this really REALLY shook me.
Asking a girl for nudes who isn't your girlfriend just isn't okay.

And I have questioned all of this ever since, because most boys watch porn. Girlfriend or not, but what gets me about tumblr is how intimate it is, it gives you access to actually connect with these people, unlike pornhub or whatever.

I thought to myself, tomorrow I am going to bring it up, but when it came to it I just couldn't. I felt so bad for snooping and almost felt like that cancelled off what he had done.

But now that a few months have passed I've became obsessive, checking his tumblr all the time (he never likes or reblogs anything), and see who he's following, it actually says when he's active and this makes me feel sick. And it has also made me check the app if he stays over or whatever, and he hasn't send any messages since those two that he sent all those months ago. So he's merely just looking.

I know I did wrong snooping, but I've been torturing myself for months, and it is something that really bothers me so I know I need to bring it up to him. But how do we go from here? Trust from both sides has been played upon and I honestly don't know what to say.

If anyone has any advice let me know
Well he is wrong for asking for nudes but also you are in the wrong for going through his phone which spells a lack of trust, so I think you do need to tell him what you saw. To be honest think your relationship is in a bit of trouble.
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emmythompson17
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(Original post by Rock Fan)
Well he is wrong for asking for nudes but also you are in the wrong for going through his phone which spells a lack of trust, so I think you do need to tell him what you saw. To be honest think your relationship is in a bit of trouble.

It's just confusing because we are on each other's phones all the time, not to see what each other are doing just when we are socialising etc. And what is also confusing is he has never ever done me wrong or done anything to make me not trust him, until now. But it's not like I was going through his phone because I don't trust him,
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Spheniscidae2039
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
Asking girls for nudes
Dump.
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username47781
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
It's just confusing because we are on each other's phones all the time, not to see what each other are doing just when we are socialising etc. And what is also confusing is he has never ever done me wrong or done anything to make me not trust him, until now. But it's not like I was going through his phone because I don't trust him,
Well you either bring it up with him and discuss what you are going to do next or ignore it and let things build up more, it is obviously eating away at you.
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SMEGGGY
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Tumble naked guys? See how he likes it
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Anonymous #1
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Are you the same girl who posted something similar a while ago? He definitely shouldn't be asking other girls nudes but I don't see anything wrong with naked girls on tumblr. Sometimes porn websites are blocked so tumblr might be the easiest option for him. I think you should bring it up. I think it's weirder/more concerning that you've been snooping and have since been stalking and withholding this information. He shouldn't need to tell you about his tumblr porn habits because like you said most guys are into porn, it doesn't really matter where he's accessing it. It isn't really any of your business. So yes say you went on his tumblr and saw the messages.
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blue900
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It depends. Can you accept him for who he is?
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ANM775
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
I'd like some advice.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 months, we are so happy, we are going on holiday together twice this year, we love to spend as much time together as possible and it is a really healthy, loving relationship.

A few months ago, when me and my boyfriend had been clubbing with some friends we came back together and were looking at the photos from the night on his phone, he crashed out and I was still on his phone, which isn't an issue we know each other's passcode and everything so.

When I was looking at the pictures I saw a photo which must have been from a few days or week earlier, and it was a screenshot of something off tumblr, I can't quite remember it now.

And I thought lol he has a tumblr.

So I know I shouldnt have, but I had had a drink (I know it's no excuse) so I typed in tumblr on his phone and the app came up.

On there I saw that he followed a few like porn tumblrs, and tumblrs where couples post pictures of themselves having sex etc. Basically sex tumblrs. I was so shocked, and didn't really know how to feel at first.
I then saw that he had messaged two instagrams asking if they trade, I'm guessing he meant nudes and this really REALLY shook me.
Asking a girl for nudes who isn't your girlfriend just isn't okay.

And I have questioned all of this ever since, because most boys watch porn. Girlfriend or not, but what gets me about tumblr is how intimate it is, it gives you access to actually connect with these people, unlike pornhub or whatever.

I thought to myself, tomorrow I am going to bring it up, but when it came to it I just couldn't. I felt so bad for snooping and almost felt like that cancelled off what he had done.

But now that a few months have passed I've became obsessive, checking his tumblr all the time (he never likes or reblogs anything), and see who he's following, it actually says when he's active and this makes me feel sick. And it has also made me check the app if he stays over or whatever, and he hasn't send any messages since those two that he sent all those months ago. So he's merely just looking.

I know I did wrong snooping, but I've been torturing myself for months, and it is something that really bothers me so I know I need to bring it up to him. But how do we go from here? Trust from both sides has been played upon and I honestly don't know what to say.

If anyone has any advice let me know


link to the tumblr?

Spoiler:
Show

for research purposes of course.
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emmythompson17
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Are you the same girl who posted something similar a while ago? He definitely shouldn't be asking other girls nudes but I don't see anything wrong with naked girls on tumblr. Sometimes porn websites are blocked so tumblr might be the easiest option for him. I think you should bring it up. I think it's weirder/more concerning that you've been snooping and have since been stalking and withholding this information. He shouldn't need to tell you about his tumblr porn habits because like you said most guys are into porn, it doesn't really matter where he's accessing it. It isn't really any of your business. So yes say you went on his tumblr and saw the messages.
It kind of is my business as he is my boyfriend and as I said tumblr can be a lot more personal and intimate than other porn sites
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FriendlyPenguin
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
It kind of is my business as he is my boyfriend and as I said tumblr can be a lot more personal and intimate than other porn sites
tumblr is a porn site?

Last I saw, it was a place to post blogs complaining about cis-het white men. What changed?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
It kind of is my business as he is my boyfriend and as I said tumblr can be a lot more personal and intimate than other porn sites
What kind of sex tumblr was it? I've only ever seen the ones where it's like gifs and short videos of sex and a few pics. But they're normally shot with a professional camera and it's still as disconnected as normal porn. Was it one where it was like nudes from actual young girls that they've taken themselves on their phone etc? Cos yeah that is a bit weird.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by emmythompson17)
It kind of is my business as he is my boyfriend and as I said tumblr can be a lot more personal and intimate than other porn sites
I remember the last time you posted. I honestly think what he did was cheating because he sent message to a girl. Think about what he would have done if those girls replied back to him.
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username3741972
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Dump him.
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trapking
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(Original post by ANM775)
link to the tumblr?

Spoiler:
Show


for research purposes of course.

:laugh:

You beat me to it my brother.
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trapking
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To OP:

Yeah like....you need to talk to your man.

I'm sure he didn't mean any serious harm but messaging those couples/girls on insta asking for nudes was a little too far.
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Little Popcorns
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Sounds like a full time goon.
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