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Why do women want gender equality in the workplace, but not in dating? watch

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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    The fear of not being believed. It's not easy just walking into a police station and saying that someone harassed you. If you know the person who did it, you have no idea what they'll do to you.
    I think a woman is far more likely to be believed by the police if she reported sexual harassment than to not be believed. Fearing retaliation from her attacker is probably the main reason some women don't report it.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    ...The issue is some women having double standards...
    Some people have double standards, some of them happen to be women and some of them happen to be men. I don't judge 'women' as a group on the basis of those who I deem to fall short of behavioural perfection in this way.
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    (Original post by Axiomasher)
    You must understand that, regardless of your own position, if other people do not regard a fertilised egg (or a developing foetus) as a person, then on that basis they aren't likely to object to abortion. Talk of 'normalising' doesn't help here as we could just as easily suggest that your characterisation of a fertilised egg as being a person is to normalise the status of a foetus to justify your own objections.
    Ok
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    (Original post by Axiomasher)
    Some people have double standards, some of them happen to be women and some of them happen to be men. I don't judge 'women' as a group on the basis of those who I deem to fall short of behavioural perfection in this way.
    Read through the thread and understand the arguments. Don't pick up one of the many comments and go on the attack.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    Read through the thread and understand the arguments. Don't pick up one of the many comments and go on the attack.
    Haha. Thank you for not being patronising.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    That is true but many of the acts happened years ago. Even the Oxfam one happened many years ago. The depiction comes across that it is happening today.
    The perpetrator are being routed today and rightly so. But to think that this has been going on for years and years without anyone having the nerve to stand up is both shocking and disgraceful in equal measures.
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    (Original post by Axiomasher)
    Haha. Thank you for not being patronising.
    You are welcome
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    (Original post by ByEeek)
    The perpetrator are being routed today and rightly so. But to think that this has been going on for years and years without anyone having the nerve to stand up is both shocking and disgraceful in equal measures.
    I sincerely and completely agree with you. There is no place in modern society for sexual assault. Women deserve to feel safe in this world, whether it is at home, in the workplace or wherever they wish to assemble.

    My point was that many of the cases that are being reported today happened many years ago. However, some stories are being reported like they happened last night. There is this air of suspicion of men, i think, and you do feel the tension.

    I am not saying that harassment does not exist today, but it has been on the decline for some time now.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    I sincerely and completely agree with you. There is no place in modern society for sexual assault. Women deserve to feel safe in this world, whether it is at home, in the workplace or wherever they wish to assemble.

    My point was that many of the cases that are being reported today happened many years ago. However, some stories are being reported like they happened last night. There is this air of suspicion of men, i think, and you do feel the tension.

    I am not saying that harassment does not exist today, but it has been on the decline for some time now.
    When you say 'many of the cases that are being reported today' happened many years ago, exactly what are you referring to? Because, as I've said, there are cases all the time that are not reported in the press. We're not so stupid to think that Weinstein, Bill Cosby et al are the only people to commit sexual harassment. So, for god's sake, how on earth do you know what the situation is with cases being reported today. Why do you proclaim to know anything about sexual harassment or the number of cases or how many cases are reported year on year. Also, if we're going to talk about big names in the press, Weinstein for example, has been committing assaults up to the present day.

    You keep saying sexual harassment is on the decline, without any evidence. As far as I can see you've just decided that yourself.
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    (Original post by littleone123)
    When you say 'many of the cases that are being reported today' happened many years ago, exactly what are you referring to? Because, as I've said, there are cases all the time that are not reported in the press. We're not so stupid to think that Weinstein, Bill Cosby et al are the only people to commit sexual harassment. So, for god's sake, how on earth do you know what the situation is with cases being reported today. Why do you proclaim to know anything about sexual harassment or the number of cases or how many cases are reported year on year.

    You keep saying sexual harassment is on the decline, without any evidence. As far as I can see you've just decided that yourself.
    Actual sexual assault cases are on the decline and I was talking about the public cases. Those are the ones that are being talked about.

    Here are some links that claim sexual assault has been coming down for some time now. Even on the BBC, it was reported some months ago, during the heat of the Weinstein situation.

    I watched a debate where one speaker proposed that we need to re-define sexual assault. Is a guy smacking a woman on the bum the same as a guy violently raping her? Is online threats of rape the same as actual rape?

    From the ONS:

    https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulat...ultandstalking

    https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulat...sexualoffences

    https://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/2828653

    https://brandeishoot.com/2017/10/06/...exual-assault/

    https://www.rainn.org/statistics/scope-problem

    I am not talking about unreported cases. Nobody can know or speculate on unreported cases until they are reported. It is sad but that is the truth.

    The reason for its decline could be many, such as women not getting assaulted as much, women not reporting cases, women reporting cases too complex that it is not recorded as standard assault etc.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    Actual sexual assault cases are on the decline and I was talking about the public cases. Those are the ones that are being talked about.

    Here are some links that claim sexual assault has been coming down for some time now. Even on the BBC, it was reported some months ago, during the heat of the Weinstein situation.

    I watched a debate where one speaker proposed that we need to re-define sexual assault. Is a guy smacking a woman on the bum the same as a guy violently raping her? Is online threats of rape the same as actual rape?

    From the ONS:

    https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulat...ultandstalking

    https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulat...sexualoffences

    https://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/2828653

    https://brandeishoot.com/2017/10/06/...exual-assault/

    https://www.rainn.org/statistics/scope-problem

    I am not talking about unreported cases. Nobody can know or speculate on unreported cases until they are reported. It is sad but that is the truth.

    The reason for its decline could be many, such as women not getting assaulted as much, women not reporting cases, women reporting cases too complex that it is not recorded as standard assault etc.
    When I say unreported, I mean not reported in the press but with legal action going on.

    I think wherever you look, whether you say it's declining or not, it's still a massive problem.

    Also, you find articles like the following which are massively concerning.

    http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk...-a8225821.html


    ' I watched a debate where one speaker proposed that we need to re-define sexual assault. Is a guy smacking a woman on the bum the same as a guy violently raping her? Is online threats of rape the same as actual rape?'

    I don't like where you're going with that comment...you are wading into patronising waters. I hate it when people act as though there's so much talk about sexual harassment now that men can't even banter with a woman without being nervous. I mean, seriously?
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    (Original post by littleone123)
    When I say unreported, I mean not reported in the press but with legal action going on.

    I think wherever you look, whether you say it's declining or not, it's still a massive problem.

    Also, you find articles like the following which are massively concerning.

    http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk...-a8225821.html


    ' I watched a debate where one speaker proposed that we need to re-define sexual assault. Is a guy smacking a woman on the bum the same as a guy violently raping her? Is online threats of rape the same as actual rape?'

    I don't like where you're going with that comment...you are wading into patronising waters. I hate it when people act as though there's so much talk about sexual harassment now that men can't even banter with a woman without being nervous. I mean, seriously?
    London is not representative of the country and the Office of National Statistics do show evidence of a decline in reported cases. You asked for evidence and I gave you several.

    I never argued that rape or sexual assault was not a massive problem. I have only stated that though it is a heinous act, there is a decline in such despicable behaviour. Which is proven by the evidence.

    I just shared an argument of someone else with you and you accuse me of being patronising. What? Although i do not agree with his point, i think there should be a review to what constitutes sexual assault. This will help to tackle it and further push it down.

    Some men have come out to say that the atmosphere is quite hostile towards them. They cannot have a cheeky banter or “try their luck” in the off chance that it could be misconstrued. You may think it sounds ridiculous but it is true.

    I think this issue will see a complete change to dating because men have to be extra careful esp to avoid wrong accusations.

    https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc...gland-42745181

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...raped-her.html
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    London is not representative of the country and the Office of National Statistics do show evidence of a decline in reported cases. You asked for evidence and I gave you several.

    I never argued that rape or sexual assault was not a massive problem. I have only stated that though it is a heinous act, there is a decline in such despicable behaviour. Which is proven by the evidence.

    I just shared an argument of someone else with you and you accuse me of being patronising. What? Although i do not agree with his point, i think there should be a review to what constitutes sexual assault. This will help to tackle it and further push it down.

    Some men have come out to say that the atmosphere is quite hostile towards them. They cannot have a cheeky banter or “try their luck” in the off chance that it could be misconstrued. You may think it sounds ridiculous but it is true.

    I think this issue will see a complete change to dating because men have to be extra careful esp to avoid wrong accusations.

    https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc...gland-42745181

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...raped-her.html
    OK if your point is just that there has been a decline in harassment, great, I'm glad we can celebrate this fact.

    I don't agree with your final point but we can agree to disagree there.
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    (Original post by littleone123)
    OK if your point is just that there has been a decline in harassment, great, I'm glad we can celebrate this fact.

    I don't agree with your final point but we can agree to disagree there.
    After many hours of arguing you finally agreed with my first point.

    What do you disagree with my final point?
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    cherryred90s, did you delete you quote to me? I received a notification but cannot see it.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    cherryred90s, did you delete you quote to me? I received a notification but cannot see it.
    Yeah I deleted it because there’s no point debating with you
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    (Original post by cherryred90s)
    Yeah I deleted it because there’s no point debating with you
    Why do you think that? What have i said or done to make you think there was no point? Have i refused to respond to your comments?
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    (Original post by loveleest)
    well tbh i always think if a guy is interested enough he would ask you out
    If anyone is interested enough in anything, they would go for it. Man or woman.

    If you want a job, you don't wait for that job to come to you. You go out and get it.

    If you want a new dress, you don't wait for that right dress to come to you. You go out and pick the dress you want.

    If you want something to eat, you don't wait for the food to come to you. You go out and buy some food.

    See my point? If you want something, you take the initiative and get it yourself. You don't sit around, waiting and hoping for something to come to you. That is the number 1 way not to get what you want.


    It's so funny to see women all pining over 1 particular guy (usually some good looking, high status male), trying to look hotter than all the other girls, waiting and hoping that guy will ask her out (then when he doesn't, they sit at home wallowing in self-pity, watching rom-coms and eating tubs of Ben&Jerry's).

    You'd have so much more success if you walked over to him, actually talked to him and made your intentions very clear from the outset. The women who get the men they want, either ask the man out themselves or make the signals so blindingly obvious, it's literally impossible for the guy to miss.
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    (Original post by loveleest)
    But why? Surely if he is a "man" he should be confident enough to ask
    How confident are you at life in general? Are you confident enough to do things like ask for directions, speak to a shop assistant for help, order something over the phone? If so, there's nothing stopping you asking a guy out.

    Gender equality means equality in everything, after all.
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    (Original post by snowman77)

    It's so funny to see women all pining over 1 particular guy (usually some good looking, high status male), trying to look hotter than all the other girls, waiting and hoping that guy will ask her out (then when he doesn't, they sit at home wallowing in self-pity, watching rom-coms and eating tubs of Ben&Jerry's).
    Have you ever actually met a woman in real life or do you just make your assumptions off movies? Where are these places that have one “good looking high class male” standing around, surrounded by eligible females waiting to be selected?
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