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Why do women want gender equality in the workplace, but not in dating? watch

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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    Well, it is a bit rude just to slam the door in someones face, no?
    Yeah it is.
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    (Original post by G.Y)
    Might be because she's old rather than a woman? I'm sure I may get some odd looks if I didn't give up my seat for an older man.
    True, but some people dont care.

    I have been forced to give up my seat for a pregnant lady when all the women on the row that I was did not stand up for her. They just did like they did not see her.
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    (Original post by cat_mac)
    Same, not like we just stand in-front of doors, helpless, until a big strong man can open the door and set us free. Holding the door for anyone following you is just standard manners :unsure:
    Yeah, that is why i dont do it for anyone. You have to be old or pregnant to get help. Just my own opinion.
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    Let's get this straight, in real life:
    1. Women are brave if they hit men, Men are evil, brutal perverts if they hit women
    2. Women are romantic if they suddenly kiss men. Men are perverted if they suddenly kiss women
    3. Women staring at men's crotch is flirting, Men staring at women's breasts is perverted and offensive
    4. In a restaurant: Women: " Let's split the bill" (she is independent), Men: "Let's split the bill" (He is cheap)
    5. It's just a mistake if women go into men's bathroom, Men are perverted if they go into a women's bathroom
    6. Lifting things: Women: "Help me", Men saying it ( they shouldn't as it is natural)
    7. At the police station: Women: "He touched my crotch", Police:"You're arrested" (to the man); Men:"She touched my crotch", Police:"Meh who cares"
    see the inequality (MIC DROP)
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    What kind of world are you living in? The people you’re dating clearly don’t want gender equality if this is what they want (which it might not be, have you asked?). Date the younger generation, all the stuff you said with the dating I disagree with: I don’t expect a guy to do this when dating. If you don’t want to do it then don’t, but don’t do it unwillingly and complain about it.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    Yeah, that is why i dont do it for anyone. You have to be old or pregnant to get help. Just my own opinion.
    Holding a door open isn’t “help” it’s just polite, if someones walking behind you then you hold the door? Would you just slam the door in someones face just because they don’t ‘need’ help? Doesn’t matter what your gender or age are it’s just being a decent person imo
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    (Original post by cat_mac)
    Holding a door open isn’t “help” it’s just polite, if someones walking behind you then you hold the door? Would you just slam the door in someones face just because they don’t ‘need’ help? Doesn’t matter what your gender or age are it’s just being a decent person imo
    I don't mean it like that. I mean holding the door open for women to go past before going in.
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    (Original post by Wired_1800)
    I don't mean it like that. I mean holding the door open for women to go past before going in.
    Isn’t that just a move to check out her butt? I find it awkward more than anything, idk anyone who would think it expected to open and hold the door while a woman walks through :unsure:
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    (Original post by cat_mac)
    Isn’t that just a move to check out her butt? I find it awkward more than anything, idk anyone who would think it expected to open and hold the door while a woman walks through :unsure:
    What?? Of course not.

    On a serious note, most door opening moves is to allow the woman to go past first.

    It is saying, “after you”, whilst keeping the door open for the lady.
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    (Original post by JoeyA2000)
    Or the age old classic "I want a nice boyfriend who'll treat me well" *Meets a nice boy who'll treat them well* "Oh he's too nice, I got bored of him" What a load of ******** make your mind up.
    and here we can observe the wild "nice guy", a rare occurrence that has been becoming more common in recent years. This one has not yet matured into becoming a full blown incel but does appear to be on that trajectory. Will continue to monitor and report back to r/niceguys.

    Prof. N.Hunter "Hunter of neckbeards"
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    (Original post by snowman77)
    This is what I don't understand about the modern day gender equality/feminism movement. They want equality in some areas, but other areas they are happy for things to stay the same as long as they receive the benefit.

    Women want equal treatment in the workplace with their male colleagues. They want equal pay (FWIW the gender pay gap is a myth - same job for same hours get paid the same, otherwise it's illegal), they don't want to experience sexual harassment in the workplace (what about all the false accusations which ruin men's careers?), they want the same opportunities men have, they want equal opportunities for promotion (despite many of them taking time off for maternity leave).

    This is all fair enough. Except they don't want equality in dating. Men are still expected to:

    - ask the woman out and face possible rejection (women might give subtle hints, but under no circumstances will they ask the man out - that is "his job"
    - pay for the first date (and possible subsequent dates as well)
    - propose to the woman
    - treat her with meals/gifts
    - hold open the door for her
    - give up his coat if she's cold, so he can freeze (but never the other way around)
    - put the majority of effort into sex (this is centered around pleasing the woman - the man's enjoyment is always assumed)
    - be manly and dominant, never show any weak emotions, keep his problems bottled up because otherwise it's "unmanly"
    - household chores must now be shared. Women no longer have to do all the cooking and cleaning, it's shared equally between men, because otherwise it's gender discrimination/oppression. Despite the fact men are still seen as the primary breadwinner in the household and a man without a job is a virtual disaster.


    So back to the original question: Why do women want gender equality in the workplace (and indeed many other areas), but not in dating? I'm interested to hear to views of men, women and any feminists.
    A perfect description of everything modern feminism does not address.
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    (Original post by snowman77)
    This is what I don't understand about the modern day gender equality/feminism movement. They want equality in some areas, but other areas they are happy for things to stay the same as long as they receive the benefit.

    Women want equal treatment in the workplace with their male colleagues. They want equal pay (FWIW the gender pay gap is a myth - same job for same hours get paid the same, otherwise it's illegal), they don't want to experience sexual harassment in the workplace (what about all the false accusations which ruin men's careers?), they want the same opportunities men have, they want equal opportunities for promotion (despite many of them taking time off for maternity leave).

    This is all fair enough. Except they don't want equality in dating. Men are still expected to:

    - ask the woman out and face possible rejection (women might give subtle hints, but under no circumstances will they ask the man out - that is "his job"
    - pay for the first date (and possible subsequent dates as well)
    - propose to the woman
    - treat her with meals/gifts
    - hold open the door for her
    - give up his coat if she's cold, so he can freeze (but never the other way around)
    - put the majority of effort into sex (this is centered around pleasing the woman - the man's enjoyment is always assumed)
    - be manly and dominant, never show any weak emotions, keep his problems bottled up because otherwise it's "unmanly"
    - household chores must now be shared. Women no longer have to do all the cooking and cleaning, it's shared equally between men, because otherwise it's gender discrimination/oppression. Despite the fact men are still seen as the primary breadwinner in the household and a man without a job is a virtual disaster.


    So back to the original question: Why do women want gender equality in the workplace (and indeed many other areas), but not in dating? I'm interested to hear to views of men, women and any feminists.

    1. I'm actually just too shy to ask people out, or generally just speaking to people if I'm honestly. Nothing to do with I expect my partner to do it.
    2. I'm more of the mindset that the person who asks = the person who pays unless they ask to split the bill.
    3. If ANYONE proposes to me I'm running the otherway. I know a lot of girls who proposed to their boyfriends though.
    4. This goes both ways; I often would buy things for my ex and he did the same for me.
    5. This isn't a guy thing, this is just a general human respect thing.
    6. I mean, I'm cold literally all the time and all my friends give me their jackets (regardless of gender) but I would do the same if I wasn't always cold.
    7. Most guys I know are dominant so they always put more effort in because it's how their relationships works.
    8. Absolutely not, my ex cried in my arms a lot and it actually made them more manly to me. Showing your emotions isn't and shouldn't be seen as weak or unmanly.
    9. Shared household chores should just be a given? There is no reason for ANYONE to do them all.

    Disclaimer: My views, not a feminist at all.
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    My two cents: I am for equality for all but would no way on earth identify as a feminist, with the way the movement is today. I agree partly with the OP's comment, however as a woman I want to put my opinion here.

    First off, I believe there is a fine line between tradition and girls not wanting to be equal in some areas. There are a couple of things that, as a woman, I would prefer the man to do, like pay for the first date and propose. I would prefer this, not because I'm sexist, just because it's nice to keep tradition. Although this is not to say that a woman can't propose or pay for the first date, I just think it's nice to keep the tradition going.

    Some of the other stuff that you said girls want I don't really believe. Like you said that men are still expected to give the women gifts. They are, but so are women. To me both should be equally contributing to the relationships and both should recieve gifts.

    Another thing that you said is that men are expected to give up their coat and be cold themselves. Maybe some women expect that, but I don't. I guess spme women expect men to give up their coats because men are scientifically warmer than women. But I wouldn't expect a man to give up their coat. That's just selfish on my part.

    Another one that you said is that men are expected to not show any type of negitive emotion. Again, some women might expect that, but I think that is ridiculous. Yes it's not sterotypically 'manly' to cry or whatever but who cares? Both genders are human and should be able to show whatever emotion they want. Again, some women might expect it, but those women are selfish.

    The last one I'll talk about is the shared house cleaning one. I guess feminists want this because their logic is that shared housework would make a man and woman equal?? I don't really care about doing most of the cleaning and stuff. I'm not gonna do it all obviously, but I think men and women have their set skills that they are better at than the other gender. And it's kinda natural for women to sway more towards doing the cleaning and men doing repair work and maintanance stuff.
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    i think yall (including op) just need to surround urself with actual decent human beings because no one i know and certainly not myself have said believe in anything that op has stated
    i think anyone should go to jail for falsely accusing rape, itd do the world a whole lot of good if everyone realised (including women) that gals can be abusers too, this is all fine but genuinely ive never heard anyone aside from old ass ladies claim all that dating stuff idk
    im a chick and id ask a dude out in a heartbeat if i really liked them, i just dont because ive never met someone i like that much
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    I strongly disagree with your argument. No feminist fights to keep social traditions such as men paying for them. It has nothing to do with equality but tradition that women (apparently) don't do the things you say. You saying women shouldn't be able to get same pay rises and progress at work if they choose to bear a child, even though sometimes they don't choose to, and the fact that we do not lay eggs but carry a baby for 9months is frankly nothing we wanted, it is purely the course of nature. If women stopped having children in order to pursue their career then we would be in trouble, which we partly already are in as we have an ageing generation, where pensions and the NHS put strain on workers. The only reason why our birth rate isn't negative is because of migration. In fact, generally white population is in decline and is expected to shrink further, with asian and black population percentages increasing dramatically.

    Anyway, about all these things you listed that women apparently want, I can tell you that women who are not feminists usually are the ones that want these. Honestly, most hardcore feminists are lesbians or something but not straight. Anyway, that whole list is a terrible generalization of which none of those I have done. I have had one boyfriend for nearly 4 years now, and I texted him first, we always have split the bill, always hated how he opened the door for me, he doesn't wear a coat like ever so I haven't had that as well, we split the effort of sex equally, he is super soft and open and I ended up crying because of him crying first in most of our arguement (so no men aren't expected to bottle shyt up), begged him to share things with me when they worry him, I do all the cleaning and he 'cooks'. The cooking is usually a ready pizza, canned soup and noodles. Sometimes just outright no meal at all. Oh and we students, so he definitely isn't a bredwinner. I've worked more over the course of my education than he has.

    Your argument has absolutely no substance to it. All of this not only applies to me, but all the single moms where men have run away and they were often too poor and not strong enough to pursue this in court. There are mothers who abandoned their hopes and dreams to raise their kids. I've grew up also in a family where my mum at one point was the only breadwinner.

    You will have no idea how the world works if you don't make a step to find out. And that includes leaving your circle of low-lives you been hanging out with. Yes there is a lot of females like u stated, but no they are not the ones who make the effort to create equality. Indeed, a female of your example does not want equality.
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    Just go MGTOW.

    You'll have less stress and more disposable income.
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    (Original post by Salimshady007)
    Let's get this straight, in real life:
    1. Women are brave if they hit men, Men are evil, brutal perverts if they hit women
    2. Women are romantic if they suddenly kiss men. Men are perverted if they suddenly kiss women
    3. Women staring at men's crotch is flirting, Men staring at women's breasts is perverted and offensive
    4. In a restaurant: Women: " Let's split the bill" (she is independent), Men: "Let's split the bill" (He is cheap)
    5. It's just a mistake if women go into men's bathroom, Men are perverted if they go into a women's bathroom
    6. Lifting things: Women: "Help me", Men saying it ( they shouldn't as it is natural)
    7. At the police station: Women: "He touched my crotch", Police:"You're arrested" (to the man); Men:"She touched my crotch", Police:"Meh who cares"
    see the inequality (MIC DROP)
    You're damn right. There's a war on straight men.
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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    It's not a gender thing. I open doors for men and I'm a female.
    It is still a gender thing. Ever heard of the phrase "ladies first" in relation to letting people through doors?

    You might open doors, but most women do not. And the ones who do are often 60+ years old. I've never had a woman below the age of ~35 hold a door open for me (not that I can remember anyway). But they still expect it from men.

    I actually get a lot of men open doors for me (in my own personal experience, men are more polite to me than women).
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    (Original post by snowman77)
    It is still a gender thing. Ever heard of the phrase "ladies first" in relation to letting people through doors?

    You might open doors, but most women do not. And the ones who do are often 60+ years old. I've never had a woman below the age of ~35 hold a door open for me (not that I can remember anyway). But they still expect it from men.
    You've met most women then?
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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    You've met most women then?
    It's my own personal experience. I've been in and out of plenty of doors at places like universities, shops etc. to find out that women generally do not hold open doors but men do. All my friends have found the same thing.

    There will be the odd exception to any rule like there always is, so I'm not sure what your point is?
 
 
 

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