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    Not sure where to start as not really good with this kind of thing of talking, I'm calum and I recently turned 30.

    I can imagine many are about to judge me harshly on here but thought I would express my feelings on how I am. I'm 30 and never had a job! All through my teenage years and early 20's I was a closeted Gay guy, like really bad. High School was awful, the guys especially made my life miserable, I didn't really attend my last year of High school at 18 because of this , from 18 to 20 I feel I just suffered with real depression and thought's of suicide, I felt lost and alone. In a lot of ways I still do. My father was a big reason as to why my life has gone down hill, he was abusive towards my mother and this carried on until 2014 when she decided to chuck him out, I spent a good majority of my life having to protect her from him, I never thought she would see sense, for that reason I feel that I have lost my teenage years and twenties because of this.
    When I was 20 I started a Law degree and lasted over a year, I left because the work was too hard but also because at my house it was constant fights and arguments with my father, battling an aggressive father, alongside the lie of being Gay for so long made me bitter against the world and just angry. My father moved out 3 years and I still felt worthless, My older brother took on the responsibility of the bills as he's a financial advisor, I decided last year to kick myself up the backside and start an Open University course at 29 now 30 as mentioned before and I'm nearly a year in and passing my tutor marked assignments. I took this route because after High school I would rather study at home than deal with individuals after what I've experienced. I deal with people in my area and I have a few friends from High School and my short time in Uni so I'm not anti-social by any means but prefer to get a degree and persevere, you may ask why didn't I look for work from 20 to 30 , but I did, I tried every avenue, retail, sales, marketing, who was going to take me with a couple of qualifications? My friend even offered to be a reference just to help me get a job but no one took me to that stage and I could never understand why.
    I had to get this off my chest and I'm sure many will judge how pathetic I am but I am so concerned that when i get my degree in over 2 years time how do I explain my circumstances? I've been on JSA before and ESA for depression and I'm on ESA now but no employer wants to hear this. Any advice would be nice

    Sorry to read about what has happened to you. It is good to see you are in better circumstances and doing something to improve your life now! In terms of finding work, I would state that you had personal circumstances that affect your work. Interviewers don't usually probe deeper than this. If you are finding it hard to do work, why not look for volunteering or work experience? This will help you develop personal and professional skills and would boost your CV. This would be a desirable option as it shows you are doing something with your time, rather than waiting until you have completed your degree.
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