I don't know whether this is depression or not. Obviously I should seek the advice of a medical professional (going to the doctor tomorrow) but want to know if anyone else has any insight into this.
So I feel very unhappy about myself: I feel uncertain about who I am and what I want (23 and feeling a bit lost). In addition, there is a constant sense of not being good enough. I am convinced that most people don't like me very much - even though several people have told me they do like and care about me. In busy social situations/groups I just want to leave because I'm convinced nobody will listen to anything I have to say. My thoughts are very negative and filled with self-hate. I will turn down job interviews, dates, nights out and other social events out of insecurity that I will not be liked/respected. I don't particularly like myself, so how can anybody else??
I don't feel suicidal. I don't cry very often. Don't self-harm and certainly don't tell anyone about any of this. But I am constantly trying to put on an act, a fake smile so that people will not see.
How are you celebrating?