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need a man's opinion pls watch

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    I've been an anxious wreck since the other night, wondering if this guy will text me back

    we met on tinder and had a really good chat for a couple hours. He wanted to take me for drinks but I was still hungover from the night before so he just came to mine and we watched tv, had some tea and then went up to my room and cuddled, watched a film, did a bit of kissing and some other stuff but no sex.
    I would've slept with him but he seemed to want to wait as we'd just met eachother (mentioned something about the second date). On tinder he'd said I seemed really cool and he'd be 'down for whatever' with me (as opposed to just sex) so I was sort of under the impression he would want to meet again, not to mention the fact he asked when i was free this week and when I walked him back to the bus station he linked arms with me, said he'd see me soon and I could come to his town or he could come to mine (they're about 5 minutes away on train).
    So I deffo got repeat date vibes. He texted me within half an hour of leaving and we had a little back and forth. Then he didn't reply to my last message until midday yesterday where he said something very half assed. So i left it a few hours and just said I enjoyed meeting him and let me know if he wants to do it again. That was 24h ago now, and I'm just starting to think he won't reply at all- which I'm really gutted about because I just felt that we clicked in an immediate way, he was acting like he really liked me and I guess I got my hopes up.

    Should I give up hope or message again? And can someone please try and explain this weird and inconsistent behaviour to me?

    ( made this post earlier but not many replies so am doing again)
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    may have just wanted to sleep with you
    you could send another text and ask him if he wants to meet, that would probs show you how he feels
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    That's a bold move, inviting someone you've only just met into your home. Good for you for having the confidence to do that.


    Impossible to say what's going on with him.
    At this very early stage the veneer of politeness is very much to the fore. So, even if he decided he couldn't stand you straight away, he still may have acted exactly like he did. Or it could be that he's married or something and is struggling to fit you in? Who knows?

    The trick in these situations is to show you're interested in him without appearing desperate. You could also use the Estate Agents trick of making it sound like there's another possible buyer in this piece of real estate (you), and that you're therefore looking for an answer as to whether he's interested or not.
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    (Original post by Tom3198)
    may have just wanted to sleep with you
    you could send another text and ask him if he wants to meet, that would probs show you how he feels
    he didn't though, so confused! We fooled around a bit and he deffo could've taken it further...

    (Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
    That's a bold move, inviting someone you've only just met into your home. Good for you for having the confidence to do that.


    Impossible to say what's going on with him.
    At this very early stage the veneer of politeness is very much to the fore. So, even if he decided he couldn't stand you straight away, he still may have acted exactly like he did. Or it could be that he's married or something and is struggling to fit you in? Who knows?

    The trick in these situations is to show you're interested in him without appearing desperate. You could also use the Estate Agents trick of making it sound like there's another possible buyer in this piece of real estate (you), and that you're therefore looking for an answer as to whether he's interested or not.
    we went for a walk around town first before I invited him back haha but yeah, my flatmates were in so it was safe

    true, true... how would I go about doing that?
    I just hate when people do this- if you're not interested, tell me!
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    I agree about it being better to be open and honest than to just stop replying to someone.
    The dating game is like working in sales. Expect more disappointments than sales closures. But it's the closures that make it all worthwhile.


    As for the estate agents trick? How about a text along the lines of: "Hi, I really enjoyed the evening that we spent together. I felt as if I had made contact with a like minded soul. As you know, I value honesty and integrity a lot. So, not wanting to be a hypocrite, I feel compelled to let you know that since we met there's another guy who looks OK who is interested in me. So far I've been holding him off... Anyway, pancake day is coming up. The Queen of Hoxton are doing Martini pancakes How about meeting me there, straight after work on Tues 13th? Please let me know by 8 pm tomorrow if you'd be up for that? And please think of a way I can let this other guy down gently. xxx"
    Adapt the meeting suggestion to whatever's most appropriate for you.


    If you hear nothing from him by the deadline you set then I guess we'll never know what happened with Mr Tinder.
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    (Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
    I agree about it being better to be open and honest than to just stop replying to someone.
    The dating game is like working in sales. Expect more disappointments than sales closures. But it's the closures that make it all worthwhile.


    As for the estate agents trick? How about a text along the lines of: "Hi, I really enjoyed the evening that we spent together. I felt as if I had made contact with a like minded soul. As you know, I value honesty and integrity a lot. So, not wanting to be a hypocrite, I feel compelled to let you know that since we met there's another guy who looks OK who is interested in me. So far I've been holding him off... Anyway, pancake day is coming up. The Queen of Hoxton are doing Martini pancakes How about meeting me there, straight after work on Tues 13th? Please let me know by 8 pm tomorrow if you'd be up for that? And please think of a way I can let this other guy down gently. xxx"
    Adapt the meeting suggestion to whatever's most appropriate for you.


    If you hear nothing from him by the deadline you set then I guess we'll never know what happened with Mr Tinder.
    thanks for your advice! I sent a similar message, basically saying I enjoyed meeting him and would really like to see him again, and was he free sunday? Because if not my friend's invited me to a concert (which is true)- but I would rather see him

    He replied after about 12h and said he was busy sunday but would like to see me another time
    so I told him I was free Monday and Tuesday and for him to let me know when works for him
    he replied about 10 h later and said he would ( very ambivalent ) and he was suprised I wanted to see him again
    I asked why and he has yet to reply :/
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    Good. You've done well on this.

    There are some red flags that he may be married and is looking for a bit on the side. No point in challenging him on this. You'll find out one way or the other as things pan out.

    Best to keep your texts to simply arranging the mechanics of your next meeting. You can ask him all the questions you want when you're with him in person - and preferably when you've gotten him to get more emotionally involved with you.

    Hope for the best whilst being prepared for the worst. And good luck.
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    Or might just not be desperate to commit to another date immediately... Sounds a little full on tbh.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been an anxious wreck since the other night, wondering if this guy will text me back

    we met on tinder and had a really good chat for a couple hours. He wanted to take me for drinks but I was still hungover from the night before so he just came to mine and we watched tv, had some tea and then went up to my room and cuddled, watched a film, did a bit of kissing and some other stuff but no sex.
    I would've slept with him but he seemed to want to wait as we'd just met eachother (mentioned something about the second date). On tinder he'd said I seemed really cool and he'd be 'down for whatever' with me (as opposed to just sex) so I was sort of under the impression he would want to meet again, not to mention the fact he asked when i was free this week and when I walked him back to the bus station he linked arms with me, said he'd see me soon and I could come to his town or he could come to mine (they're about 5 minutes away on train).
    So I deffo got repeat date vibes. He texted me within half an hour of leaving and we had a little back and forth. Then he didn't reply to my last message until midday yesterday where he said something very half assed. So i left it a few hours and just said I enjoyed meeting him and let me know if he wants to do it again. That was 24h ago now, and I'm just starting to think he won't reply at all- which I'm really gutted about because I just felt that we clicked in an immediate way, he was acting like he really liked me and I guess I got my hopes up.

    Should I give up hope or message again? And can someone please try and explain this weird and inconsistent behaviour to me?

    ( made this post earlier but not many replies so am doing again)
    I reckon you should message him back and ask him for some hot bum sex! I'm sure he'll be down, then just go for dinner (but make sure all the bum juice is cleaned off) and eat some food!and then talk!
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    Sounds like he's gone a bit cool. I'd leave the ball in his court.
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    (Original post by Zarek)
    Sounds like he's gone a bit cool. I'd leave the ball in his court.
    that's what I've done but it's bumming me out. Been nearly a week since we met now and I've barely had a word. No reply from him since last update but he hasn't unmatched me or just turned me down so I don't want to risk another message in case there's still a chance he's interested hahaha
    I promise I'm not usually this psycho or obsessive over guys, I just felt like this could head somewhere amazing
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    that's what I've done but it's bumming me out. Been nearly a week since we met now and I've barely had a word. No reply from him since last update but he hasn't unmatched me or just turned me down so I don't want to risk another message in case there's still a chance he's interested hahaha
    I promise I'm not usually this psycho or obsessive over guys, I just felt like this could head somewhere amazing
    Yes, it's horrible when things seem to have some promise and then fade. Fine to leave a door open but you have to focus on plan B. In my experience if it turns angsty early on its never going to be great anyway.
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    this guy is just waiting there for you to show more attention towards him. So he might wanna feel special and tell his friends that a girl keeps texting me and i am awesome kinda thing.
    Or he is just a good guy who is busy with some other things (more important to him). Its about the priority he gives to certain things.

    overall i say, Chill he is just taking some time.
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    (Original post by equinox72)
    this guy is just waiting there for you to show more attention towards him. So he might wanna feel special and tell his friends that a girl keeps texting me and i am awesome kinda thing.
    Or he is just a good guy who is busy with some other things (more important to him). Its about the priority he gives to certain things.

    overall i say, Chill he is just taking some time.
    (Original post by Zarek)
    Yes, it's horrible when things seem to have some promise and then fade. Fine to leave a door open but you have to focus on plan B. In my experience if it turns angsty early on its never going to be great anyway.
    yeah, I guess you're right. Even if he did come back now and say he wanted to hang out again I'd be questioning this past week and feeling anxious and like I couldn't trust him. I just wish he'd been honest with me.
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    Sounds like you wanted that D badly
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    (Original post by Dunnig Kruger)

    How about a text along the lines of: "Hi, I really enjoyed the evening that we spent together. I felt as if I had made contact with a like minded soul. As you know, I value honesty and integrity a lot. So, not wanting to be a hypocrite, I feel compelled to let you know that since we met there's another guy who looks OK who is interested in me. So far I've been holding him off... Anyway, pancake day is coming up. The Queen of Hoxton are doing Martini pancakes How about meeting me there, straight after work on Tues 13th? Please let me know by 8 pm tomorrow if you'd be up for that? And please think of a way I can let this other guy down gently. xxx"
    TL;D bloody R. He'll never read that.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been an anxious wreck since the other night, wondering if this guy will text me back

    we met on tinder and had a really good chat for a couple hours. He wanted to take me for drinks but I was still hungover from the night before so he just came to mine and we watched tv, had some tea and then went up to my room and cuddled, watched a film, did a bit of kissing and some other stuff but no sex.
    I would've slept with him but he seemed to want to wait as we'd just met eachother (mentioned something about the second date). On tinder he'd said I seemed really cool and he'd be 'down for whatever' with me (as opposed to just sex) so I was sort of under the impression he would want to meet again, not to mention the fact he asked when i was free this week and when I walked him back to the bus station he linked arms with me, said he'd see me soon and I could come to his town or he could come to mine (they're about 5 minutes away on train).
    So I deffo got repeat date vibes. He texted me within half an hour of leaving and we had a little back and forth. Then he didn't reply to my last message until midday yesterday where he said something very half assed. So i left it a few hours and just said I enjoyed meeting him and let me know if he wants to do it again. That was 24h ago now, and I'm just starting to think he won't reply at all- which I'm really gutted about because I just felt that we clicked in an immediate way, he was acting like he really liked me and I guess I got my hopes up.

    Should I give up hope or message again? And can someone please try and explain this weird and inconsistent behaviour to me?

    ( made this post earlier but not many replies so am doing again)
    I stopped reading after "we met on tinder" and I have come to a clear conclusion, you're going to hell.
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    (Original post by Bang Outta Order)
    TL;D bloody R. He'll never read that.
    I trimmed that slightly lol, basically just said my friend has concert tickets sunday but if he's around I'd rather see him

    (Original post by seedapuss)
    I stopped reading after "we met on tinder" and I have come to a clear conclusion, you're going to hell.
    yeah everyone who uses tinder is essentially damned. If you'd have carried on after the tinder bit you'd have seen the part where we sacrificed a homeless man in a satanic ritual and then had an orgy next to his corpse
    Spoiler:
    Show

    f u
 
 
 
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