so I left islam only to come back last year. then i struggled to believe in a God and gave up. Now all these existential thoughts are polluting my mind.
i don't have depression but a really messed up view of life-
all i ever think is: what if we aren't even supposed to be alive and reproduce? there is no way of enjoying life without a religion but they're all made up. and now i know the truth - that we have no purpose.
having no purpose gives me the weirdest existential thoughts
i don't know what to do
i'm always crying and i hate living with this mind.
i would do anything to believe in islam and a god but theres nothing that's convincing me right now
...we were on a break