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He used the n word watch

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi everyone

    I just don’t know how to feel. I’m black and he’s white. We went to watch the black panther movie since it came out today.
    He told me he watched the trailer and thought it was like an avatar n**** movie.

    I was absolutely speechless and just laughed it off but now I can’t stop thinking about it.
    What should I do
    Like many white people, he probably wasn't ill intentioned, but just unaware that it's NEVER okay to use that word when if you're white. Confront him about it, ask whether or not he's aware that it's not okay. It may just be a case of ignorance.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by jambojim97)
    Like many white people, he probably wasn't ill intentioned, but just unaware that it's NEVER okay to use that word when if you're white. Confront him about it, ask whether or not he's aware that it's not okay. It may just be a case of ignorance.
    He’s just told me that he didn’t realise it was offensive. He thought he would use it freely and it wouldn’t be a problem which I think is bs.
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    It's a personal thing. I don't think whatever anyone's view of him (including me) determines what your course of action should be. I think words inherently have no value and It's either the speaker or listener who attaches value to It (Simply said, you could either take offense or not). That's just my stance on It and honestly, It doesn't really matter, since IMO It's best you weigh what's important to you and make the decision rather decide It on the basis of someone else's opinion of him. With that said I'll give my opinion on him If that's what you're interested In. My perspective on Is that I expect he didn't intend It with malice and you should leave It in the past If It still offended you, but I don't really know him to say with certainty what he meant by It.
    • #10
    #10

    Why are you getting so triggered over it, you're choosing to get caught up over a joke, stop taking life so seriously smh
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    if it offends you then i would say its wrong to be on the safe side
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    Op this site is the last place you should ask this for two reason.
    1. Majority of these lot are still in their late teens or early 20'.
    Basically their balls have not dropped yet, to tell you what you should do.

    2. Majority of the site are white.
    Due to this, you will get alot of people telling you to take it as a joke and shrug it off because they do not understand or experienced what it means.

    Anyway to those saying you can't be racist if you are in an interracial relationship is a clear example of my first reasons for saying alot of people here lack lif experience. I have known and witnessed racism in a relationship. An example, one of my closest friends is black and his gf (ex) is Spanish. Yet she used to say racists things about black people. The last straw was when she went to return something and apparently she didn't have her way with the cashier who was black. She thought for whatever reason it was the right thing to go on a racist rant about black people to my friend who was black. In the end my friend got rid.

    Being in an interracial relationship does NOT mean you cannot be racist.
    Some people may have a fetish for a girl that isn't the same race as them.
    It could be a rebellion against their family.

    There are countless reasons you can still be very much racist and be in an interracial relationship and infact its similar to how white people like to claim they are not racist by identifying that one black or asian friend their have. Alot of times and (i've seen this), they are racist however they may just get along with that one black guy or they may feel that one black guy is somehow different from the rest therefore they will be cool with him, but still maintain their racist views.

    Anyway you bf clearly doesn't respect you.
    It's as simple as that. If he does he wouldn't say what he did.
    Alot of people will think its minor, but that is the problem. Alot of the time we seem to ignore subtle clues about a person and shrug it off, only for them to show us the their true characteristics later down the line. For all you know, he has no interest in taking your relationship further and what you current have is just for now. Harsh, but its the truth.

    I say you get rid. Ask your parents and see what their reaction will be.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But it wasn’t funny and he didn’t realise it was wrong until I told him.
    What did he say then?

    **** yo mouf before I put a cap in yo ass biatch?
    Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
    • #6
    #6

    (Original post by Zelex)
    Lol...did you miss the part where I openly acknowledged where you are coming from nor did I ever say that the view I explained was mine personally. I was just explaining things from a different perspective. You got all emotional and thought otherwise. Not once did I say that was my perspective. I have never used the n word personally nor do I agree with it's use by any race. I find it funny that you hide behind "anonymous", probably because you lack the confidence to express your opinion openly. That says it all. I've don't anymore time to waste on such a person.

    Good luck with your agenda on this thread. Hope you gain what you want out of it.
    Take your bitter, triggered, emotional and cowardly self off this thread, thanks
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    (Original post by It's****ingWOODY)
    Hmmm... perhaps adding all the main anons, like Anonymous #1, Anonymous #2 and so on, might just work? An option to ignore anonymous posts really should be implemented tbh.
    (Original post by euphrosyne)
    I can't take this anon business seriously. What are we going to do, virtually run around on the Internet and name and shame them? It wouldn't get anywhere. Nobody cares!

    Embrace who you are and all your problems! :whip2:

    1. AnonymousThis message is hidden because Anonymous is on your ignore list.




    :rofl:
    • Political Ambassador
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    Political Ambassador
    (Original post by Bang Outta Order)
    1. This message is hidden because Anonymous is on your ignore list.




    :rofl:
    Just tried it as well, it works Now I won't get notifications when anon's quote me, good riddance
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    (Original post by Bang Outta Order)
    1. This message is hidden because Anonymous is on your ignore list.


    :rofl:
    I am shook. You sir have just saved lives :love:
    • #11
    #11

    It's funny how people are saying "just get over it" . I'm black and trust me it's not funny at all , he could have easily said like a black avatar movie. If your not black I don't think you'll understand why we get so touchy about the word even if you think you do. To have someone call you the n word can be one of the most hurtful things ever when they mean it in a bad way. He didn't chose his words wisely and before you all come at me I know he didn't mean it in a bad way or directed it at her but I personally think it's a word no one should use regardless of race......
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    Hi OP,

    I am a white girl in a relationship with a black man and my eyes have been massively opened to racism and cultural differences since being together. I don't think what your boyfriend said was AT ALL acceptable. Something me and my boyfriend discuss a lot is the use of the "N word" and how he believes that due to it's derogatory and horrendous meaning in the past, black people reclaiming ownership and using the word should be their prerogative. I personally never use the word and don't think that anybody should - I honestly think it should be dead and buried.

    In this situation I'd encourage you to approach your boyfriend and discuss why you find it hurtful. Black people have a really hard time of it in British society with the amount of casual racism out that about how they must like chicken and listen to rap etc etc. Young black boys getting stopped by the police and black people in general getting far less employment opportunity. I think you really need to stand up for yourself here and educate your partner on race issues and how they make you feel. He should be your pillar of support and not just another uneducated white person saying dumb stuff. I'm really annoyed (but not surprised) by the amount of people on here brushing this off and saying it's acceptable - its just not! White people really need to learn some respect and educate themselves on issues faced by ethnic minorities today.

    PM me if you want to chat.

    S x
 
 
 
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