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Not sure why my friend reacted in this way watch

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    • Thread Starter

    It's a FWB.. but we never seem to see each other; he never seems to have any time for me.

    I asked him last night if he wanted to Skype, and he replied 3 hours later saying sorry, he'd had to do work that evening.

    I said no worries, what about Thursday night? And he said I can't as a female friend is coming to stay, but tonight if you want.

    I then replied asking what time, as I wasn't free the entire evening. He didn't read my message for 7 hours and then I sent one saying I was back at 8. He replied saying "Damn, I actually have a presentation tomorrow which I forgot about!" I'll let you know if I don't finish it too late!" (Not even sure if this is the truth)

    Anyway I just said, oh no, that's too bad but no worries, good luck for it and hope you have fun with your friend this weekend.

    He replied saying no she's only coming tomorrow night, and this is a girl who I've known for 20 years.

    I don't know why he had to try and reassure me as I literally just told him to have a good time.

    Then I just said oh cool that's a shame she's not there long etc. and then he started going on about how she was sleeping on a mattress, she was there to see other friends, it was the only solution etc.

    And I just said oh that's cool then if you can put people up, have a good weekend etc.

    And then he started saying well I feel like you're annoyed at me now.

    I literally said nothing; I don't know where he got that from, and I don't know why he reacted in that way.. does it sound like I said something wrong? Thanks

    It sounds to me like the FWB thing isn’t working for you both and you should stop it before it becomes toxic.
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    In a FWB situation at least one person generally ends up developing feelings eventually, even if you don’t see each other much on a week by week basis. It’s sharing your body with another person creating all sorts of chemical reactions in the brain and over enough time eventually some form of emotional attachment tends to develop (this is hardwired into our brains).

    This sort of situation can leave at least one of the people involved with a very broken heart, which is normally the girl, but not always, as our brains etc are more susceptible to bond through physical intimacy.

    It sounds like something more might be in the early stages of developing here and if you don’t want them to then I’d keep a close eye on things and consider when it becomes time to lessen contact to reduce the heartache that can come from this situation.

    His reaction, as you have described it, seems to me to be that of someone who was trying to reassure you that nothing else is happening with the other girl. But if you aren’t seeing each other properly and it’s just FWB then what does it matter and why would he need to clarify the situation with you? Sounds like he cares.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    Thanks a lot for the replies! Before I asked him if he could do the Skype again and he said he couldn't as he was busy at that time etc.. and then I just said ok no worries good luck, have a good night with your mate and speak to you sooN! And he started again saying no but the thing is we're not even going out the only reason she is staying here is because there is no other choice etc. etc.. I don't know why he reacted like that again just because I said 'have a good night with your friend!' But yeah, I really don't know..
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