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Need some advice on moving on watch

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    So a couple of months ago I got talking to an amazing girl through an online dating app. We probably texted each other every day for around a month and spoke on the phone too. We then went on our first date, which was one of the best first dates I’ve ever had in all honesty.

    Things were all looking pretty good, and we went on to go on another two dates afterwards. On the second date she kissed me, and we ended up kissing for several minutes overall and she seemed really into me. On the third date she also held my hand, hugged me and also kissed me again and things seemed to be going very, very well. We got on extremely well and the chemistry there was something like I’d never felt before.

    However, following our third date I received a text from her telling me that one of her friends was threatening to message me after discovering we were out together. I found this a little odd, as why would it really matter to anybody? Anyway, following this she seemed to be attempting to ghost me.

    Several days later, I looked on this guy’s Facebook profile to find the words ‘in a relationship with (girl’s name)’. At this point the thought crossed my mind that she had just played me, as according to that status hey had been together weeks before we even went on our first date. I had it out with her, she told me I’d got it wrong, that they’d split up a while ago etc, that she’s guessed she’d now lost me because of it.

    Anyway after chatting for a while that day, I eventually came around to the idea that I believed her. So I agreed to give it another try with her which is what she was asking me for. Anyway, two days later she proceeded to ignore any texts I sent or phone calls I made again, which confused the absolute hell out of me and so I told her it was Just best that we leave it. I eventually got to speak to her, and I asked why she’d pretended to be interested in me when she wasn’t, and All she could muster was ‘sorry’, and ‘have a nice life’.

    Truth is, I’m devastated that I’ve lost her. I honestly don’t know what to think about the whole situation, it really does seem as though I’ve been made a fool of, but despite that I’m really struggling to move on from her. She’s all I seem to think about...
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    #1

    Let me guess, you met her on Tinder? Bad move. Don't do it again. If you want a meaningful relationship, look in real life. Time will heal your current wounds. All the best
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    I actually met her through eHarmony. I just feel ridiculous for feeling so down about it all. I keep blaming myself, feeling like I’ve messed it up, but then I have to keep reminding myself that she was lying to me the entire time we spoke, and that she was in a relationship all along...
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    (Original post by ThatBloke79)
    I actually met her through eHarmony. I just feel ridiculous for feeling so down about it all. I keep blaming myself, feeling like I’ve messed it up, but then I have to keep reminding myself that she was lying to me the entire time we spoke, and that she was in a relationship all along...
    This situation sounds like it’s getting to you and it sucks.
    Unfortunately there’s nothing you can do about it now. Forget about it, forget about her, realise your worth and don’t settle for anything less. You’re letting her live rent free in your mind and feelings right now. Don’t let it happen, sleep it off and find someone else.

    Whilst I agree that online dating sites can have problems there are good experiences out there too. I’d recommend being cautious.
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    (Original post by ThatBloke79)
    I actually met her through eHarmony. I just feel ridiculous for feeling so down about it all. I keep blaming myself, feeling like I’ve messed it up, but then I have to keep reminding myself that she was lying to me the entire time we spoke, and that she was in a relationship all along...
    Fair enough, well use this as a lesson. In general avoid online dating sites, in my humble opinion, if you want a real relationship. It's rare anything will come of it. It's def not you're fault - you were just a little naive perhaps, but can bounce back and learn from this
    • #2
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    (Original post by ThatBloke79)
    I actually met her through eHarmony. I just feel ridiculous for feeling so down about it all. I keep blaming myself, feeling like I’ve messed it up, but then I have to keep reminding myself that she was lying to me the entire time we spoke, and that she was in a relationship all along...
    i dated someone via dating site as well and we last a month and a bit. things were moving on very quickly for me and my friends thought the same but he felt differently. All in all, i would rather stay single en look bk at dating site hoping i would get amazed one day 'eMr Marrige'. Meeting in real life is way much different en flipping via online pages.
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    "At this point the thought crossed my mind that she had just played me, as according to that status hey had been together weeks before we even went on our first date. I had it out with her,"

    That is where you went wrong. At that stage in your relationship you had no right to have anything out with her.

    Learn from it and move on.
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    I don’t understand, what do you mean?She’d been lying to me and putting thoughts into my head that we’d get together, yet all the time she was already in a relationship?
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    I wouldn't worry about the online dating being the issue. I met a guy a while back in 'real life', we texted, talked and got on really well, but when we set up a date, he had forgotten he was on holiday in a different country, and couldn't be bothered to tell me until a week later. About a month later, I found out on Instagram that he was in Paris with his GF. I feel that this girl was just looking for short-term affair, maybe she had just broken up with the other guy, and realised too late that you were looking for a longer-lasting relationship with more meaning than just a fling. At least you didn't get too close, try to get back on that dating site, or if the situation has put you off, join a society or club, and see if you find someone who shares some interests with you.
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    So it’s been a week since we last spoke, and even then we didn’t really speak properly. Some days I find myself barely thinking about her but then on others I just can’t get her out of my mind and it’s really getting me down.

    I know I shouldn’t have, but I’ve sent her a couple of messages through the dating app to which she’s not responded. I don’t really know what I’m hoping for if I’m honest. I’m really struggling with this one...
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    (Original post by ThatBloke79)
    So it’s been a week since we last spoke, and even then we didn’t really speak properly. Some days I find myself barely thinking about her but then on others I just can’t get her out of my mind and it’s really getting me down.

    I know I shouldn’t have, but I’ve sent her a couple of messages through the dating app to which she’s not responded. I don’t really know what I’m hoping for if I’m honest. I’m really struggling with this one...
    Time to move on mate
    occupy yourself, go out with friends, show more interest in your hobbies etc
    Time will heal
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    (Original post by ThatBloke79)
    So a couple of months ago I got talking to an amazing girl through an online dating app. We probably texted each other every day for around a month and spoke on the phone too. We then went on our first date, which was one of the best first dates I’ve ever had in all honesty.

    Things were all looking pretty good, and we went on to go on another two dates afterwards. On the second date she kissed me, and we ended up kissing for several minutes overall and she seemed really into me. On the third date she also held my hand, hugged me and also kissed me again and things seemed to be going very, very well. We got on extremely well and the chemistry there was something like I’d never felt before.

    However, following our third date I received a text from her telling me that one of her friends was threatening to message me after discovering we were out together. I found this a little odd, as why would it really matter to anybody? Anyway, following this she seemed to be attempting to ghost me.

    Several days later, I looked on this guy’s Facebook profile to find the words ‘in a relationship with (girl’s name)’. At this point the thought crossed my mind that she had just played me, as according to that status hey had been together weeks before we even went on our first date. I had it out with her, she told me I’d got it wrong, that they’d split up a while ago etc, that she’s guessed she’d now lost me because of it.

    Anyway after chatting for a while that day, I eventually came around to the idea that I believed her. So I agreed to give it another try with her which is what she was asking me for. Anyway, two days later she proceeded to ignore any texts I sent or phone calls I made again, which confused the absolute hell out of me and so I told her it was Just best that we leave it. I eventually got to speak to her, and I asked why she’d pretended to be interested in me when she wasn’t, and All she could muster was ‘sorry’, and ‘have a nice life’.

    Truth is, I’m devastated that I’ve lost her. I honestly don’t know what to think about the whole situation, it really does seem as though I’ve been made a fool of, but despite that I’m really struggling to move on from her. She’s all I seem to think about...
    I'm in kind of a similar situation, all we can do is try to forget them and move on. She's not worth it to feel bad over, yeah we loved them but it was never real, not both ways anyway, always one sided. All you can do is forget her and move on, there are plenty of girls out there who you will one day meet who will treat you right.

    Keep your head up, move on and don't let that get you down.
 
 
 
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