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Dating someone who is not as well educated as you are and parents disapproval(advise) watch

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    (Original post by PhilanderingBum)
    You know, I was actually reading an article about how there is a shortage of educated men given the increase in female applications to Uni (look it up if you're interested). A decade from now, your situation will (probably) be the norm.
    Can you please share that article with me? I find that really interesting but heartbreaking :rolleyes:
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    Tbh it’s not up to them then, if they’re decent parents they’ll eventually just accept it (and it’s not like you’re about to get married is it) you know what I mean
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    (Original post by PhilanderingBum)
    You know, I was actually reading an article about how there is a shortage of educated men given the increase in female applications to Uni (look it up if you're interested). A decade from now, your situation will (probably) be the norm.

    I guess you must have rather conservative parents if they expect the guy to be more well educated than you. I didn't think people still cared about that sort of thing.

    If you pursue a relationship with him and it fails, you'll know it wasn't meant to be. If you don't, you may end up carrying the doubt, guilt and regret with you. I've been there. Do what you want. Life is all about mistakes afterall .
    They're super traditional in that way and I've tried explaining that it's not all about money but they just don't seem to listen. I really do want to carry on the relationship but at the same time I'm scared that my parents will completely disown me
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    (Original post by LG as you were x)
    Tbh it’s not up to them then, if they’re decent parents they’ll eventually just accept it (and it’s not like you’re about to get married is it) you know what I mean
    Yeah but to them they literally think I'm about to get married and they don't want me to waste my time on him because even if I did say I wanted to marry him they would say no
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    Tbh if you did say yes to him it wouldn’t be up to them. Hate to point out the obvious but don’t marry him or anything just to spite them
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    (Original post by LG as you were x)
    Tbh if you did say yes to him it wouldn’t be up to them. Hate to point out the obvious but don’t marry him or anything just to spite them
    Yeah but to them they care about what other people think so even who I marry has to match up to their standards which I think is absolutely crazy and no I would never just marry anyone to spite them that's definitely not my intention
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    Tbh it sounds like it’s their egotistical problem, not yours, never let anyone dictate your life, worst comes to worst they’re not happy
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    (Original post by LG as you were x)
    Tbh it sounds like it’s their egotistical problem, not yours, never let anyone dictate your life, worst comes to worst they’re not happy
    I guess so, it's just sad to see that they can't accept it
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    (Original post by euphrosyne)
    Can you please share that article with me? I find that really interesting but heartbreaking :rolleyes:
    This is probably the most comprehensive one though there are many others:
    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017...sperate-steps/

    Also, look up the Chinese term 'leftover women'. The Chinese use it to describe overeducated women who are unmarried/single by 30 as a result of the social stigma attached to women 'dating down' with less-educated/succesful men. Intresting stuff. Some reckon western civilisation is heading in this direction
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    Tnh you’re only 19
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    (Original post by PhilanderingBum)
    This is probably the most comprehensive one though there are many others:
    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017...sperate-steps/

    Also, look up the Chinese term 'leftover women'. The Chinese use it to describe overeducated women who are unmarried/single by 30 as a result of the social stigma attached to women 'dating down' with less-educated/succesful men. Intresting stuff. Some reckon western civilisation is heading in this direction
    Just read the article and did some research. It's so fascinating yet terrifying imo. I've got to admit, one of my biggest fears is never being able to settle down due to not finding someone I connect with on an intellectual level. It's not so much about getting a formal education (i.e. going to school/university), but there are just so many people who don't think education is valuable, and even worse, people who think they're better than getting an education (a boy in my school who wanted to be a lawyer said he was too good for university, and that just didn't make sense to me). I'm all for female empowerment and feminism, but like that article says, it's going to cost us if there's no man out there who can match our energy at the very least. I wouldn't mind a man who hasn't gotten a degree/gone to school, but if he's got no ambition and just settles, then I'm done. It really seems like that's happening these days

    Thanks for sharing that, it's so interesting.
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    Realistically, if the genders were swapped in this scenario, I doubt there would be much of a problem similar to this. I mean, you could ask the guy to learn to cook, take care of the house and do the stuff a housewife is supposed to do and since you're highly educated, you could be the "breadwinner of the house"?

    Just a suggestion
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    (Original post by JDieMstr)
    Realistically, if the genders were swapped in this scenario, I doubt there would be much of a problem similar to this. I mean, you could ask the guy to learn to cook, take care of the house and do the stuff a housewife is supposed to do and since you're highly educated, you could be the "breadwinner of the house"?

    Just a suggestion
    Yeah I mean we have talked about that but he wouldn't want just me to work to make an income as he would also love to work and contribute towards anything he can and he is willing to do any work to earn money and support me. It's just that whatever job he is gonna get is never gonna be technically a higher paid job than mine and that's the issue with my parents just because they're like that
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    (Original post by emwilliams044)
    Yeah I mean we have talked about that but he wouldn't want just me to work to make an income as he would also love to work and contribute towards anything he can and he is willing to do any work to earn money and support me. It's just that whatever job he is gonna get is never gonna be technically a higher paid job than mine and that's the issue with my parents just because they're like that
    Welp, did you ask them WHY getting a higher paid job than you is a concern? Is it not enough to live humbly and lovingly than luxuriously and being hollow inside?
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    (Original post by JDieMstr)
    Welp, did you ask them WHY getting a higher paid job than you is a concern? Is it not enough to live humbly and lovingly than luxuriously and being hollow inside?
    Well they just keep saying that they want me to live comfortably and have someone to support me in terms of income but to them that means the guy has to have either the same kinda paid job as me or higher. I mean I would rather live with someone I love over someone who is loaded but parents think otherwise
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    (Original post by emwilliams044)
    Well they just keep saying that they want me to live comfortably and have someone to support me in terms of income but to them that means the guy has to have either the same kinda paid job as me or higher. I mean I would rather live with someone I love over someone who is loaded but parents think otherwise
    If you are financially independent, then go for what your heart desires the most. Parents will give in after a while but you better be prepared for the consequences in the short term.
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    It's natural for parents to want the best for their children but yours are overstepping the mark here. All you can do is prove to them that you're with a decent, ambitious guy and give them time to get used to the idea of you being together.
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    (Original post by bones-mccoy)
    It's natural for parents to want the best for their children but yours are overstepping the mark here. All you can do is prove to them that you're with a decent, ambitious guy and give them time to get used to the idea of you being together.
    Yeah I get they're just being protective and everything but yeah they are just set in their ways and I'm just hoping they can change their minds later on
 
 
 
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