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Feelings for riding instructor help!

Hi

I'm not really sure if i'm posting this in the right place or if there is much point in it, but here goes...
basically i just wanted to ask if any1 has had any simialr experience or if it is normal for me to feel this way
i dont really know how to explain it but i have really strong feelings about my riding instructor who is the same gender who i also keep my horse at her yard. I always cant wait to go down in the morning or anytime as I just want to see her or speak to her, and want to be with her all the time, and its affecting what i do as I try to organise my life so that i can go down there when i know she will be there so i can see her. i dont think it is same feelings as i would for a partner, but i cant expalin them, and if anyone else goes to watch her compete or goes with her for something i get really jealous, and i dont know what to do about it?
Any advice or similar expereicnes would be helpful.

Reply 1

Kabloomybuzz

19

I had this when I was a lot younger for a youth worker. it was love, but not sexual attraction. iw as too young for that really. Since I've loved someone else of the same gender, and has sexual feelings for other girls, and realised and come out as a lesbian. I'm not saying you are neccesarily but its possible.

How old are you?
How long has it been going on?
Have you had/do you have feelings for guys?

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

it hasn't been goin on for that long, as I only came to the yard in november last year. I didn't feel like this as soon as i met her, but for the last 3 months. I am 19, yes I do fancy men. i'm not sure if it is a sexual attraction i feel for her or just me idolising her like lessthanthree said, its just so difficult. Thank you for your comments.

Reply 3

Kabloomybuzz

19

Could be a crush, or simple admiration

Reply 4

amanda_1788

It sounds as though it could be just strong admiration for your instructor and maybe eventually you will get past it.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

I had really similar feelings for one of my same gender teachers when I was younger and I'm definitely straight - got me into quite a lot of bother really - but it is probably just really strong admiration, she's someone you look up to, a role model. I totally understand how intense you can feel and how much it can begin to overtake ur life - just be careful and try to focus on other things, a bf perhaps? It will prob pass like amanda_1788 said, I don't no if it wud, bt i always had the impression that if i cudve had a closer relationship and friendship with my teacher I wud've got over it much quicker instead of all the drama, awkwardness and well, loathing it ended in - mayb it cud work for u, as its a different situation. Gd luck with it and don't worry too much! xox.

Reply 6

FadeToBlackout

15

It's a crush and is perfectly normal. Don't worry about it; it will pass, or it could develop.

Were you feeling attracted to the horses in an Equus kind of way, well... that would be cause for concern!

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

I know time will probably help, but its so frustrating, as its making me feel really depressed lately and just wish i didn't feel this way. :frown:

Reply 8

Anonymous 33

I'm kinda the same, (I'm gay) and I (think) have a crush on my jumping / riding instructor. I look up to her a lot, but there's a fairly considerable age gap...(7years...) I also have Asperger's syndrome so I find this stuff hard anyway but I can't tell if it's just very strong admiration or more. When I had a panic attack about going over a course of jumps, she gave me a hug, and I'm still getting butterfly's just thinking about it 3 days on...
Also, she has a boyfriend.
Wow I'm screwed up.

Reply 9

flamboy

3

ride him

Reply 10

Profesh

20

Original post by Anonymous 33

I'm kinda the same, (I'm gay) and I (think) have a crush on my jumping / riding instructor. I look up to her a lot, but there's a fairly considerable age gap...(7years...) I also have Asperger's syndrome so I find this stuff hard anyway but I can't tell if it's just very strong admiration or more. When I had a panic attack about going over a course of jumps, she gave me a hug, and I'm still getting butterfly's just thinking about it 3 days on...
Also, she has a boyfriend.
Wow I'm screwed up.

For one who ought to excel at numeracy, you seem unable to differentiate '2008' and '2015'.

Reply 11

Anonymous 33

1) I know.
2) I also am dyslexic so that particular trait does not apply for me.
3) I could not care less, as I've never said that to anyone before, and it helps to have it down.

Reply 12

Profesh

20

Original post by Anonymous 33

1) I know.
2) I also am dyslexic so that particular trait does not apply for me.
3) I could not care less, as I've never said that to anyone before, and it helps to have it down.

Then might I suggest that either you undertake (pun intended) formal training as a necromancer or, more realistically, start a new thread.

Feelings for riding instructor help!

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