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The Unforseen Spark of Determination watch

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    Highers

    They shouldn't be too difficult right? I mean last year was, to put it simply, a breeze for me. Surely I can get away with it again? Even if I don't do as well as last year, I have nothing to work towards. I don't really care what happens.

    However I have recently discovered that all of the above is false.

    ▪Highers are mentally-draining

    ▪I can't get away with putting in 0 effort

    ▪I have something to work towards

    ▪I care

    So this is me trying to find a way to keep myself motivated. I want to go to university and I want to follow my aspirations. I'm not going to let anything stop me; not even myself...

    At 16 years old I am in the midst of my highers and I am currently studying 5 subjects:

    History
    Geography
    French
    German
    English

    Last year I was awarded A's in all of these subjects for my National 5's so, I thought it wouldn't be much of a stretch to achieve such positive grades again this year. After receiving my Prelim results a few weeks ago I have come to realise that is not the case. My grades were disasterous. Never have I performed so awful, with the only exception being English. I thought I would be able to walk into my exams with no revision and I would be fine. Evidently I was wrong.

    After these results quickly bringing me back down to earth, I now feel ready to put in the effort required to get my highers.

    Escpecially since just last week, I finally found something I want to study after school: Criminology. It was a very sudden decision but it sparked something inside of me. I already had all of the requirements, except my higher results of course, but these target seemed achievable. At a minimum I need to acquire 2 A's and 2 B's.

    So this is my goal. I am determined to push through my seemingly never-ending procrastination and work hard to do the best I can.

    I know I can do it.
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    (Original post by Lren10)
    Highers

    They shouldn't be too difficult right? I mean last year was, to put it simply, a breeze for me. Surely I can get away with it again? Even if I don't do as well as last year, I have nothing to work towards. I don't really care what happens.

    However I have recently discovered that all of the above is false.

    ▪Highers are mentally-draining

    ▪I can't get away with putting in 0 effort

    ▪I have something to work towards

    ▪I care

    So this is me trying to find a way to keep myself motivated. I want to go to university and I want to follow my aspirations. I'm not going to let anything stop me; not even myself...

    At 16 years old I am in the midst of my highers and I am currently studying 5 subjects:

    History
    Geography
    French
    German
    English

    Last year I was awarded A's in all of these subjects for my National 5's so, I thought it wouldn't be much of a stretch to achieve such positive grades again this year. After receiving my Prelim results a few weeks ago I have come to realise that is not the case. My grades were disasterous. Never have I performed so awful, with the only exception being English. I thought I would be able to walk into my exams with no revision and I would be fine. Evidently I was wrong.

    After these results quickly bringing me back down to earth, I now feel ready to put in the effort required to get my highers.

    Escpecially since just last week, I finally found something I want to study after school: Criminology. It was a very sudden decision but it sparked something inside of me. I already had all of the requirements, except my higher results of course, but these target seemed achievable. At a minimum I need to acquire 2 A's and 2 B's.

    So this is my goal. I am determined to push through my seemingly never-ending procrastination and work hard to do the best I can.

    I know I can do it.
    Great first blog post Looking forward to following your progress
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    (Original post by Labrador99)
    Great first blog post Looking forward to following your progress
    Thank you very much! It's certainly going to be a wild ride!
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    So already there is a spanner in the woodworks...

    Just last week week I began to experience a constant dull ache in my right arm, my writing arm, however it was not for the first time. You see I am a frequent player of Lawn/Carpet bowls, a fairly unknown sport but a sport nonetheless. Given the amount of time I dedicate to bowling, it is no wonder that I would experience problems. Despite this, on previous occasions any pain I felt would fade but this time is much different.

    It was during a regular bowling match that the pain came to life. I recognised the feeling immediately but all I could do was try to ignore it and continue on. I can't say I was all to surprised that my arm decided to give up on me during this match however, considering it was my 6th game of the week. After approximately 15 hours of bowling within 5 days I suppose it was time for a break. Due to this fact, I assumed the pain would pass after the game as it usually did. (In this case I was wrong. Again. As I am typing this I can still feel the slight pangs of pain in my elbow.)

    When it didn't let up, I decided a trip to the local doctors was in order to ensure that it wasn't anything to serious and to see if there was something I could do to aid my arm. Thankfully they confirmed it wasn't anything too serious but I wasn't in the clear. The conclusion of the visit told me that I had a case of tendonitis as a result of over-use. Unfortunatly there isn't much I can do but rest my arm as much as possible and ice it.

    This is where my problem comes in. As I can still feel the pain spark when I'm writing it makes long periods of writing difficult which in turn makes revising a challenge. When revising, I need to be writing something down otherwise I can not retain any information. Now when I want to actually sit down and work, I need to be wary of my arm. I've even tried writing with my left hand but that gets me nowhere. All I can do is try to fight through the pain and take regular breaks however, even then it can still becomes too much. I can feel my motivation slipping away as quickly as it came as I continue to put off doing revision and homework for this very reason. I just hope that with plenty rest, ice and hopefully a few possible physio sessions I can re-build the strength in my arm.

    This couldn't have happened at a more inconvenient time as I really do need that arm. :pain:

    ~an inconvenienced and sore Lauren
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    First of all... This is exhausting.

    My spark of determination was going strong but I've got to admit it's tough to keep it going. As I decided to wait until more than half-way through the year to get my act together, I'm now facing the consequences. I keep on trying to tell myself that I can do it and I will benefit from putting in the hard work but it's hard. I'm not used to trying.

    Recently, assignment work has been pushed on us and deadlines are slowly creeping up like a python waiting to attack it's prey. Of course said prey is me. And there's no escape. I finally forced myself to get the work done and after taking a couple days off to rest my aching arm, I was finally able to complete my Geography assignment which then left me with only one other looming threat; my History assignment. After a brutal night trying to complete it... a day after the deadline, I could finally shove my laptop away from me at 2am in relief. And hey, I got it finished didn't I? Now my attention has to be focused towards my English folio which might be even more of a challenge as, lets just say, major improvements are required for my discursive essay. Hopefully I can find some time within the next week to sit down and sort through it. My only savior may be my creative essay as that was the only draft that seemed to go down well with the teacher. Fingers crossed :yy:

    School life has also been getting tougher too, after a couple years of having a close knit group of friends, we have all seemed to drift away from each other. Most classes now are becoming unbearably lonely and some supposed friends seem to almost just completely ignore me in classes in favor of taking to someone else. The majority of the time they even speak over me like I'm not even there and honestly? It hurts. I've never been the most likable to people and I was finally happy but now, that seems like a distant memory. I'm thankful for the few couple friends I have truly but, I only get to see them in a few classes and a couple times during the day and even then, they have their own friends. I just hope that things turn-over in time for the start of the my 6th year. I don't think I could handle another year of this. People are fickle things aren't they?

    On the bright side, I have been able to obtain a physio session much quicker then expected as it is only a few weeks away, most people have to wait much longer. I actually cant wait to get the strength back in my arm and not have to worry about hurting it or not being able to write for long periods of time without being in pain. I think I may have also found the possible route of the problem! Of course my theory does ultimately boil down to my bowling and well, to solve the issue might be quite challenging. The way I play is pretty weird and unique and, leaves most people in shock of how I can play as well as I do (and I'm right there with them). This may be the cause or the reason why my arm strength deteriorated as I can feel the pain more when I play a certain way but hopefully the physio will help me get back to normal, and I don't have to somehow find a way to change the way I do things...

    ~a sad and lonely Lauren
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    (Original post by Lren10)
    First of all... This is exhausting.

    My spark of determination was going strong but I've got to admit it's tough to keep it going. As I decided to wait until more than half-way through the year to get my act together, I'm now facing the consequences. I keep on trying to tell myself that I can do it and I will benefit from putting in the hard work but it's hard. I'm not used to trying.

    Recently, assignment work has been pushed on us and deadlines are slowly creeping up like a python waiting to attack it's prey. Of course said prey is me. And there's no escape. I finally forced myself to get the work done and after taking a couple days off to rest my aching arm, I was finally able to complete my Geography assignment which then left me with only one other looming threat; my History assignment. After a brutal night trying to complete it... a day after the deadline, I could finally shove my laptop away from me at 2am in relief. And hey, I got it finished didn't I? Now my attention has to be focused towards my English folio which might be even more of a challenge as, lets just say, major improvements are required for my discursive essay. Hopefully I can find some time within the next week to sit down and sort through it. My only savior may be my creative essay as that was the only draft that seemed to go down well with the teacher. Fingers crossed :yy:

    School life has also been getting tougher too, after a couple years of having a close knit group of friends, we have all seemed to drift away from each other. Most classes now are becoming unbearably lonely and some supposed friends seem to almost just completely ignore me in classes in favor of taking to someone else. The majority of the time they even speak over me like I'm not even there and honestly? It hurts. I've never been the most likable to people and I was finally happy but now, that seems like a distant memory. I'm thankful for the few couple friends I have truly but, I only get to see them in a few classes and a couple times during the day and even then, they have their own friends. I just hope that things turn-over in time for the start of the my 6th year. I don't think I could handle another year of this. People are fickle things aren't they?

    On the bright side, I have been able to obtain a physio session much quicker then expected as it is only a few weeks away, most people have to wait much longer. I actually cant wait to get the strength back in my arm and not have to worry about hurting it or not being able to write for long periods of time without being in pain. I think I may have also found the possible route of the problem! Of course my theory does ultimately boil down to my bowling and well, to solve the issue might be quite challenging. The way I play is pretty weird and unique and, leaves most people in shock of how I can play as well as I do (and I'm right there with them). This may be the cause or the reason why my arm strength deteriorated as I can feel the pain more when I play a certain way but hopefully the physio will help me get back to normal, and I don't have to somehow find a way to change the way I do things...

    ~a sad and lonely Lauren
    Hi :wavey:

    That's great news about the physio Hope it really helps And well done on getting your geography and history assignments done Assignments are the worst

    Sorry to hear stuff at school hasn't been going so well though With the friends thing, I would try and just put yourself first- it's not selfish to do so. If people aren't being nice, don't fall to their level, just keep doing you and one day that will pay off. Is there any way you can meet your friends outside of school, or even meet new friends? I've found volunteering is a great way of meeting new people from all walks of life- you could maybe try doing something like that for a couple of hours a week?

    Anyway, wishing the bast of luck to you and hope things improve
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    (Original post by Labrador99)
    Hi :wavey:

    That's great news about the physio Hope it really helps And well done on getting your geography and history assignments done Assignments are the worst

    Sorry to hear stuff at school hasn't been going so well though With the friends thing, I would try and just put yourself first- it's not selfish to do so. If people aren't being nice, don't fall to their level, just keep doing you and one day that will pay off. Is there any way you can meet your friends outside of school, or even meet new friends? I've found volunteering is a great way of meeting new people from all walks of life- you could maybe try doing something like that for a couple of hours a week?

    Anyway, wishing the bast of luck to you and hope things improve
    Hello!

    Thank you, I think it's going to be a great help! They're awful but alas the stress is not over yet, I am yet to write them up under timed conditions 😯

    It's been difficult but I'm just trying to get through it! Dealing with frendship problems isn't entirely new to me but I'm going to keep going. On another note, there is only 4 weeks left of this school year which gives me time to sort through everything! I did debate signing up to volunteer work and I have managed to sign up to a place however I think there's only a couple others doing it! Timing at the moment is difficult to work around after exams I'm definitely looking into more options!

    Thank you very much
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    (Original post by Lren10)
    Hello!

    Thank you, I think it's going to be a great help! They're awful but alas the stress is not over yet, I am yet to write them up under timed conditions 😯

    It's been difficult but I'm just trying to get through it! Dealing with frendship problems isn't entirely new to me but I'm going to keep going. On another note, there is only 4 weeks left of this school year which gives me time to sort through everything! I did debate signing up to volunteer work and I have managed to sign up to a place however I think there's only a couple others doing it! Timing at the moment is difficult to work around after exams I'm definitely looking into more options!

    Thank you very much
    :wavey:

    No problem Aw They'll be over soon

    It must be making things difficult, especially at this time of year. But yeah, it will be the Easter holidays soon and everyone will hopefully concentrate on their exams and at least put it on hold for a bit
    That's great you've been looking into volunteer work I love volunteering and get so much out of it- hope you can too
 
 
 
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