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    I don’t know how to explain it. But everytime I see him in lesson or around college,I freeze up. Hes the first person I look for in a place. Almost like its second nature.He looks at me once and I forget how to breathe. Once in lesson he looked my way and laughed at something his friend said ( his friend was sitting next to me) and my heart started beating like crazy. I lost all my concentration, wasting 45 minutes of lesson just staring blankly.



    I know what your all thinking. Just talk to him, or tell him how you feel or something. But I cant. I have to focus on my studies and he is the biggest player in college. Plus Im such a freaking tomboy, there is literally no way in hell he would be interested. I think I try to act masculine and loud to pretend like im fine and im not dying inside.



    I am not socially awkward, I have tons of girlfriends and a few guy friends. But everytime he makes a comment or says something to me, I freeze up and act like an aloof *****.



    This is my second year knowing him, and it wasn’t until a few months ago that I realized that I have already fell hard for this guy. My focus and concentration is all messed up and I need help. I need to stop freezing . I need to breathe.



    Please help me.
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    How old are you? Each age handles relationships very differently.
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    Something like that is really hard to just drop, especially if you see him everyday at school. Id say the easiest thing would be to get your mind obsessed about something else, it doesn't have to be a new crush, just find something or someone that is better than him, a way of doing this is by maybe focusing on his flaws, notice his actions or something and find something you can hate about him-- this is what I did to get over this ****boy that will not get out of my head, he will flirt and ask me out endlessly but I knew he was a player and id be stupid to start falling for him, so I focused on the way he smells like cigarettes all the time ( he is heavy smoker) . idk find your thing
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    (Original post by MDesfontaine)
    How old are you? Each age handles relationships very differently.
    17
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    I have liked this girl since year 7 now in year 11. she has had multiple boyfriend's during this time and current in a relationship, what I do is focus on someone else.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    17
    So you're in college or Sixth Form by now. Your hormones are dying down but still prevalent. You're a virgin. Also hyperaware of your outer appearance which shows a lack of trust in your own self identity that you project to the world.

    I would recommend poetry for all that teenage angst. Netflix binging on lesbian tv shows like Faking it because they're funny light hearted and when you're straight you can't picture him doing all that stuff the girl does. Figuring out what makes you feel sexy and confident because if you were comfortable being a tomboy you wouldn't use it as a point of him possibly not being attracted to you. Read a romance book because he would never able to live up to the character in the book. It's just impossible.
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    (Original post by Carla.Power)
    Something like that is really hard to just drop, especially if you see him everyday at school. Id say the easiest thing would be to get your mind obsessed about something else, it doesn't have to be a new crush, just find something or someone that is better than him, a way of doing this is by maybe focusing on his flaws, notice his actions or something and find something you can hate about him-- this is what I did to get over this ****boy that will not get out of my head, he will flirt and ask me out endlessly but I knew he was a player and id be stupid to start falling for him, so I focused on the way he smells like cigarettes all the time ( he is heavy smoker) . idk find your thing
    Thats the thing. I find everything about him perfect. He may be a player but he is incredibly sweet and very smart. He is also very respectful and funny. He doesn't smoke at all, dresses well and is incredibly handsome. My friends say he's short but I think his height is perfect. whatever "flaws" somebody points out just make me feel like I know him better. I know he isn't flawless, but I feel like I can accept him even with his flaws. ( oh and btw he smells amazing- ik this sounds creepy but once we had to complete this project together and I felt like I was intoxicated )

    I see him almost every day and he sits approx 3 ft away from me. its ruining me. I don't think I could hate him for anything... but ill take your advice into account. thank you xx
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    Focus on what matters. If your A Levels matter more to you, then you should put all your energy on that, not him xx
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    (Original post by MDesfontaine)
    So you're in college or Sixth Form by now. Your hormones are dying down but still prevalent. You're a virgin. Also hyperaware of your outer appearance which shows a lack of trust in your own self identity that you project to the world.

    I would recommend poetry for all that teenage angst. Netflix binging on lesbian tv shows like Faking it because they're funny light hearted and when you're straight you can't picture him doing all that stuff the girl does. Figuring out what makes you feel sexy and confident because if you were comfortable being a tomboy you wouldn't use it as a point of him possibly not being attracted to you. Read a romance book because he would never able to live up to the character in the book. It's just impossible.
    Poetry? like writing poetry? or reading? any recommendations on where to start

    I am comfortable looking the way I am. Its just that every time he's with a girl, she's this gorgeous, feminine specimen. And then there me. I don't want to change myself for him, but I also know realistically he would never go for someone like me, which makes it all the more painful.

    Altho ill defiantly take into consideration you Netflix advice....thank you xx
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    (Original post by Ella_08)
    Focus on what matters. If your A Levels matter more to you, then you should put all your energy on that, not him xx
    I know thats why I am most bothered by this. I am hoping to study medicine in the future and to think that a teenage crush is an obstacle.... its ridicules
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Poetry? like writing poetry? or reading? any recommendations on where to start

    I am comfortable looking the way I am. Its just that every time he's with a girl, she's this gorgeous, feminine specimen. And then there me. I don't want to change myself for him, but I also know realistically he would never go for someone like me, which makes it all the more painful.

    Altho ill defiantly take into consideration you Netflix advice....thank you xx
    Write it. Stories. Anything creative.

    And then there's me.

    Like that phrase shows that you are not confident in yourself and how you look because you speak as if these gorgeous feminine girls are superior to the way you portray yourself. At 17 the body is still moulding and you can look how you want with a little bit of effort. Ruby Rose hella cute for a tomboy, like you just need to take your own personal tastes and just apply them so it makes you feel like a gorgeous specimen as well
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know thats why I am most bothered by this. I am hoping to study medicine in the future and to think that a teenage crush is an obstacle.... its ridicules
    Tbh you shouldn't feel bad about liking him, it's fine that you do. But when it gets to the point where it's making a big impact on your every day life then I would try and move on, pretend he's not there, remind yourself you have more important tasks etc.... I know i'm not in your situation and i don't know what it's like to like someone this much but it seems like you're a really nice, clever person with high ambitions and I would really try to pursue those goals. What I'm trying to say is it's no issue having a crush but, like you say, it may be an issue when it's turning more into a distraction
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    (Original post by MDesfontaine)
    Write it. Stories. Anything creative.

    And then there's me.

    Like that phrase shows that you are not confident in yourself and how you look because you speak as if these gorgeous feminine girls are superior to the way you portray yourself. At 17 the body is still moulding and you can look how you want with a little bit of effort. Ruby Rose hella cute for a tomboy, like you just need to take your own personal tastes and just apply them so it makes you feel like a gorgeous specimen as well
    your post has me in tears. I always thought I wasn't happy with my body image but I hadn't realised it was to this extent. I will defiantly try to become a version of myself that I will come to love. thank you so much for opening my eyes

    Ps Ruby Rose is just :heart:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    your post has me in tears. I always thought I wasn't happy with my body image but I hadn't realised it was to this extent. I will defiantly try to become a version of myself that I will come to love. thank you so much for opening my eyes

    Ps Ruby Rose is just :heart:
    I'm sorry I made you cry but honestly like 17 was a time when I reinvented myself... twice and nobody judges you for it and the moment you just feel like a gorgeous specimen you start being like well, if he doesn't like me he's missing out cause I'm great.
    I wish you luck on your journey and she's gorge
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    (Original post by Ella_08)
    Tbh you shouldn't feel bad about liking him, it's fine that you do. But when it gets to the point where it's making a big impact on your every day life then I would try and move on, pretend he's not there, remind yourself you have more important tasks etc.... I know i'm not in your situation and i don't know what it's like to like someone this much but it seems like you're a really nice, clever person with high ambitions and I would really try to pursue those goals. What I'm trying to say is it's no issue having a crush but, like you say, it may be an issue when it's turning more into a distraction
    Yes defiantly. Im just going to ignore him and focus on my alevels, because they matter the most now.Ill try and distract myself with a hobby or maybe some reading. thank you so much for the advice xx
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    (Original post by MDesfontaine)
    I'm sorry I made you cry but honestly like 17 was a time when I reinvented myself... twice and nobody judges you for it and the moment you just feel like a gorgeous specimen you start being like well, if he doesn't like me he's missing out cause I'm great.
    I wish you luck on your journey and she's gorge
    Its okay honestly I feel much better now having let it all out. I will become a gorgeous specimen and I will get over him. I can't thank you enough for helping me. good luck to you too on your journey xx
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Its okay honestly I feel much better now having let it all out. I will become a gorgeous specimen and I will get over him. I can't thank you enough for helping me. good luck to you too on your journey xx
    Im glad!
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    Players will ultimately hurt you in the end.
    Go for the shy, good guy who secretly likes you, but is afraid to admit it.
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    ********** his ****
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