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    Pls mark my GCSE AIC paragraph using 9-1 system and give improvement comments. Thanks
    How does Priestley make the audience dislike Mr Birling? Write about: - The characters’ relationships and views - How Priestley presents them by the ways he writes
    Priestley makes the audience dislike Mr Birling by showing the characters lack of intelligence and arrogance. Arthur birling statues at the dinner table that “there isn’t a chance of war”. The audience of 1945 would have already been through 2 wars so know that his statement is totally wrong. The noun “chance” connote possibility showing that Mr Birling believes that there was absolutely no likelihood of war happening. This shows he is very complacent and doesn’t know what he is talking about. Priestley’s use of dramatic irony makes the audience lose trust in the character. Priestley does this to make the audience move away from the character of Mr Birling as his views or incorrect. Alternatively this quote shows that Mr Birling so trying to stay positive and doesn’t want to think about the horrors of war. However this could make the audience dislike the character even more as he shouldn’t be talking about war if he doesn’t want it. Mr birlings lack of intelligence is further shown during his long speech when he describes the titanic as “unsinkable”. The audience already know that it does sink therefore this is another factually incorrect statement made by Mr Birling.
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    "Priestley makes the audience dislike Mr Birling by showing the characters lack of intelligence and arrogance. Arthur birling statues at the dinner table that “there isn’t a chance of war”. The audience of 1945 would have already been through 2 wars so know that his statement is totally wrong. The noun “chance” connote possibility showing that Mr Birling believes that there was absolutely no likelihood of war happening. This shows he is very complacent and doesn’t know what he is talking about. Priestley’s use of dramatic irony makes the audience lose trust in the character. Priestley does this to make the audience move away from the character of Mr Birling as his views or incorrect. Alternatively this quote shows that Mr Birling so trying to stay positive and doesn’t want to think about the horrors of war. However this could make the audience dislike the character even more as he shouldn’t be talking about war if he doesn’t want it. Mr birlings lack of intelligence is further shown during his long speech when he describes the titanic as “unsinkable”. The audience already know that it does sink therefore this is another factually incorrect statement made by Mr Birling."

    Clearly on the right track. Good reference to dramatic irony, context and audience response. Look at the bits I have underlined and see if you can make the necessary correction. Although you are encouraged to refer to language using the correct terminology, the focus on 'chance' doesn't really add much here. Similarly, the alternative view is not very convincing. When you look at what else Birling gets wrong it is fairly clear that Priestley wants us to see him as ignorant rather than optimistic. Save these methods for when there is a more significant example.
    You could also maybe comment on his pompous and arrogant personality here. It's not just that his judgement is at fault, it's the way that he is so confident in his own opinions that he tells Eric to be quiet when he tries to give a different view.
 
 
 
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