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Am I reading the wrong signs? Confused! watch

    • Thread Starter

    Ok, so I don’t think I’ve ever been as confused at something in my whole life.

    I’ve never been the JK Rowling so hopefully this mess makes some sense to someone. It’s my first post here too. *sarcastic claps all round*

    Anyway, I’m in college, enjoying it, new friends, new starts, new memes and dreams. I’ve met some friends, great bunch of people. *cliché inbound* - I have a friend, who’s a guy, I’m a guy too, and he’s just incredible to say the least. He’s so kind, genuine, caring, hot, looks great with his beard, and just is an all-round great person. He’s Persian and a few years older, so I think that just adds to the reason he’s so kind and caring. However, it’s safe to say I’ve developed some feelings for the guy, but the usual cliché occurs, does he sound “into me” or something other than straight to you? I’m in 2 minds, it’s confusing. Just read on, you’ll probably be confused too.

    But before you start reading this, there are some things you should know. No one knows that I’m gay, or bi, beside one person from school, and we don’t go to the same college anymore. And I’m still in denial but note that I’m not confused because I’m “not 18 yet”, I’m perfectly stable. No one around me daily knows, not no one, but I’ll sometimes get the occasional gay joke thrown to me, but jokingly.

    Without this being too lengthy and you wanting to doze off, there are things he does, says and acts with me to lead myself to think he isn’t straight, however there are also other things he does that makes me completely doubt myself.

    So, for the things he does that makes me thing he may be somewhat attracted to me. The other day, we were going home together, and we were talking and then he said, ‘oh, you’re so cute!’, and then I obviously replied with the same back, I had my arm around him beforehand too, and he let me and sort of leant inwards to me. And then other day to day things; he’ll say things such as ‘baby cakes’ and very occasionally touch my leg and my face, and I mean very occasionally, like a few times a week at least. Additionally, some “looks” will be exchanged, winks exchanged (all him starting this, and not me, though I will give it back), and just general things I’d personally consider ‘flirty’ behaviour, would you too?

    I’m writing this after an exhausting week so there will be key details I’m certain I’m missing out, but I think I’ve given everything I can remember whilst writing this. These things alone give me enough confidence to think he’s not straight, however, these next things really toy with my thoughts. For example, whenever a girl walks by, not all the time, but most of the time, he’ll say things like ‘wow, look at her a**”, or tits, or “I’d **** her”. However, I’m not the type to start rating girls out of looks, I’m not a big fan of judging girls, and guys based on the outside, they may have a bitter personality. I’m not a lover of that! Furthermore, when we’re in class, if a solid 10 walks by, he’ll literally get out of his seat and go have a look through the glass. When he’s with our other friends, and a girl walks by they’ll go, “Ohh, what do you reckon, about an 8?”. You know, desperate **** like that. Again, I don’t like to judge on how big people’s assets are, so I usually laugh it off or just not respond – I think they might be catching on though, I sometimes get a gay joke thrown my way. However, the guy in question never really does it when it’s just us two, very rarely in fact. Like 1 or 2 times since the 6 months I’ve known this guy. So, the guy will do things like that and it really has me going around in circles here. Is he, is he not, am I losing the plot here (yes).

    I just really have no idea, one time he’ll be admiring someone on the street, the next we’ll be briefly talking about general homosexual activities. It’s strange. I don’t get it, am I reading the complete wrong signs. Or is he just trying to get me to come out to him. He must know by now, if it’s not obvious I want him then he must be in some lucid dream.

    So, what do you guys think, I’d hope someone can shed some light on what you’re thinking.
    • #1

    Really, the best thing to do would be to ask him, preferably without being too obvious about your feelings, just in case he hasn't realised and isn't interested. Overall, what you've described makes it sound like he is gay and interested, he's just pretending to be straight around other people. That's probably why he acts differently when it's just the two of you. Really, you'll never know until you ask.
    Hope I helped
    • Thread Starter

    Thanks for your help!

    I've dabbled on the idea of him putting it on but I've seen his social media and all the girls, that lack some clothing, that he follows. It's so confusing.

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