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Height difference when dating - does it matter? watch

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    #1

    I like a friend of a friend, and I feel he may like me too. We clicked instantly when we met and playfight whenever we see each-other... but I'm 5ft 9 and he's possibly the shortest guy I've met (maybe 5ft 2 - if that). He always finds me in a crowd and I kinda want to hint he take me out some time - but I'm nervous he only considers us to be flirting for bants... because of our height gap. I can't stop thinking about him and it's driving me crazy lol. As stupid as this sounds, I'm also conscious about people talking and / or staring if we date. What's everyone's thoughts?
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    I can totally understand your initial hesitation but at the end of the day it is about your personal connection - how you click emotionally and physically.
    Your friends are going to be rooting for both of you - I think everyone will be super happy about your connection. IF you get 'looks' outside of your friends you will learn (I hope) that your personal connection is waaaay more important than judgmental looks from people who don't even know you.
    The guy who is 5'2" is likely to be pretty insecure and I am sure if he is interested in you like you suspect he will thrilled to know you're interested. Talk to your mutual friend and let that friend know what you are thinking.

    Also look up Tina Fey - writer and performer from SNL and other movies look up pics of her and her husband. She is a very successful woman (and he husband has been very successful as well) and she loves the guy she loves and she is significantly taller than he is.

    Please pursue the guy you like and don't let the outside world - or most of all your insecurity - deter you from potentially finding a very good guy that you click with.

    Best of luck!
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    The height difference shouldn't matter if your connection is strong. There's a 9" difference between my girlfriend and me but we're doing great. Hope you do well.
    Best Of Luck!
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    Yes it matters but most people will overlook it for the right person. Also if he's 5'2" then he's probably resigned to dating a taller woman anyway.
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    Why would you care what other people think?

    It's up to you. If you don't care about his height, then go ahead. If you have reservations due to his height, that's entirely reasonable, but it should be a personal decision for you.
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    Very Important Poster
    It matters if you let it matter.

    People will look but that's them, if you're both happy then it can work.
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    I've definitely noticed an increase in couples where the girl is taller than the guy in the past year.

    perhaps times are a changing.....
    • #2
    #2

    Everyone is giving you the optimistic, fairy land answers. This is the real answer, at first you might not mind it but once it becomes serious, people will take the piss out of it, it'll hurt both of your confidence, he'll be made out to feel like he's under your control and you'll be told your dating a little kid. People will probably say stuff like, does he need a ladder to kiss you. Do you have to sit down to kiss him..etc.

    Also, once you're serious, tm. You'll realise you want more masculinity from your boyfriend, which wouldn't really work out, end of the day, the guy always likes to feel like the bigger person and the girl always wants to feel protected and small.
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    It's just height, if you're both happy with eachother then it shouldn't make a difference.
    • #3
    #3

    I fancy a girl who's 3-4 inches taller than me but I just feel like she'd think it was weird to go out with a shorter guy . . . sounds like there may be hope . . .
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Everyone is giving you the optimistic, fairy land answers. This is the real answer, at first you might not mind it but once it becomes serious, people will take the piss out of it, it'll hurt both of your confidence, he'll be made out to feel like he's under your control and you'll be told your dating a little kid. People will probably say stuff like, does he need a ladder to kiss you. Do you have to sit down to kiss him..etc.

    Also, once you're serious, tm. You'll realise you want more masculinity from your boyfriend, which wouldn't really work out, end of the day, the guy always likes to feel like the bigger person and the girl always wants to feel protected and small.
    Maybe if you're literally children, sure. Once you reach adulthood people cease giving a **** about that kind of thing.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I like a friend of a friend, and I feel he may like me too. We clicked instantly when we met and playfight whenever we see each-other... but I'm 5ft 9 and he's possibly the shortest guy I've met (maybe 5ft 2 - if that). He always finds me in a crowd and I kinda want to hint he take me out some time - but I'm nervous he only considers us to be flirting for bants... because of our height gap. I can't stop thinking about him and it's driving me crazy lol. As stupid as this sounds, I'm also conscious about people talking and / or staring if we date. What's everyone's thoughts?
    you might get some looks but those who care don't matter and those who matter don't care, you decide your life, not the norms of society
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    Looks a bit odd but shouldn't stop you, and if it does he can't mean much
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    I'm 5'9". Always dated shorter guys; when you really like someone, height becomes the last thing you think about
    • #4
    #4

    love have no borders or walls my sister.
    • #5
    #5

    haha wow I was in the similar situation as yourself once, I'm 5'9 too and also dated a guy who was 5'2. despite his short stature he was almost perfect in every other way - very confident, a real gentleman, funny, treated me well, he wasn't even insecure, I mean you could tell he knew he was small but didn't let it affect him etc I was happy to date him (despite all the nasty looks and comments we got - mainly from people who knew us). in the end it just didn't work out (the height difference had nothing to do with it) and despite the fact I miss him the only thing I don't mind is the sore neck/back I always had from having to bend down to kiss him good night. you know people say things like you should always try to overlook the flaws and thats true for the most part but if its detrimental to your health then you shouldn't have to make such a sacrifice for the sake of love. in the same way that everyone defends someone for not wanting to date a morbidly obese people (yes I know that the difference is the weight can be lost!) due to the fact that said person doesn't want to have his organs damaged when squashed during sex. or just doesn't want to lose their partner early from heart disease or diabetes. fact is I'm now with a guy who treats me just as well and hes taller than me and so theres no resentment.
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    #5

    *only thing I don't MISS^
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I like a friend of a friend, and I feel he may like me too. We clicked instantly when we met and playfight whenever we see each-other... but I'm 5ft 9 and he's possibly the shortest guy I've met (maybe 5ft 2 - if that). He always finds me in a crowd and I kinda want to hint he take me out some time - but I'm nervous he only considers us to be flirting for bants... because of our height gap. I can't stop thinking about him and it's driving me crazy lol. As stupid as this sounds, I'm also conscious about people talking and / or staring if we date. What's everyone's thoughts?
    1st- if you're really interested in this guy then you shouldn't be scared.
    2nd- all of those other people won't be in your relationship, so there thoughts don't really matter.
    3rd- follow your heart and do what you think is best
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    really depends on your personal situation, but if your a very confident girl then this likely wont work, because lets be real you wont respect him.

    A guy being 5'10 and a girl 5'2 is very different lol.

    A guy being 5'2 and a girl being 5'10 is just weird loo king on the street.

    But if its true love attraction can prevail far worse barriers.
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    Why is everyone assuming OP is a girl? :confused:
 
 
 
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