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Teacher student boundary advice watch

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    Basically I am in my 1st yr of a-levels and I am taking a-level maths, my maths teacher I have had since year 9 so this is our 4th year together. A quick little history between us before I share the next part : I hated my teacher in yr 9 and was a pain in the ass student bcos he used to blame me for my other friend sat next to me who shares the same name, however in yr20 and upwards I really liked him (teacher wise) and I generally couldn't think of a better teacher and we have a fair few jokes together.

    Now onto the story - Basically in 6th form this girl who was in a different math class for gcse is with me for maths a level as there is only 1 class and we are the only 2 girls. Obvs I have had this teacher for awhile so I am confident with answering in class and can easily have a joke, however when he gives our homeworks or tests back he will give a passing comment as he hands them back (e.g. well done / next time come and see me if you are stuck). The other day the other girl in my math class spoke to me about my maths teacher and feels like I should report him as he is 'too close and personal with me and spends a lot of time when giving my work back and my pat my shoulder or nudge me to say well done', she also thinks that he is very very personal considering there should be a teacher student boundary especially with him being male and me female. I personally don't think anything is wrong with this however I am quite oblivious to these kinds of things and bcos I have known him for awhile I probably don't realise.

    I am just looking for everyones advice ! Thanks!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically I am in my 1st yr of a-levels and I am taking a-level maths, my maths teacher I have had since year 9 so this is our 4th year together. A quick little history between us before I share the next part : I hated my teacher in yr 9 and was a pain in the ass student bcos he used to blame me for my other friend sat next to me who shares the same name, however in yr20 and upwards I really liked him (teacher wise) and I generally couldn't think of a better teacher and we have a fair few jokes together.

    Now onto the story - Basically in 6th form this girl who was in a different math class for gcse is with me for maths a level as there is only 1 class and we are the only 2 girls. Obvs I have had this teacher for awhile so I am confident with answering in class and can easily have a joke, however when he gives our homeworks or tests back he will give a passing comment as he hands them back (e.g. well done / next time come and see me if you are stuck). The other day the other girl in my math class spoke to me about my maths teacher and feels like I should report him as he is 'too close and personal with me and spends a lot of time when giving my work back and my pat my shoulder or nudge me to say well done', she also thinks that he is very very personal considering there should be a teacher student boundary especially with him being male and me female. I personally don't think anything is wrong with this however I am quite oblivious to these kinds of things and bcos I have known him for awhile I probably don't realise.

    I am just looking for everyones advice ! Thanks!
    If you havent noticed anything and he hasnt made you feel uncomfortable then I dont think he has done anything wrong. If you asked him not to touch and he did then youd have reason. Some teachers can be tactile. I cant see a lot in it.
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    I had teachers male and female who would pat me on the back or nudge me to tell me I had done a good job. It's fine. Having a good professional relationship with a teacher makes learning easier. Unless you're uncomfortable then there's nothing wrong with it.
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    Oh, God, being a male teacher sounds horrible.
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    (Original post by num.7)
    Oh, God, being a male teacher sounds horrible.
    Too many boundaries these days
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically I am in my 1st yr of a-levels and I am taking a-level maths, my maths teacher I have had since year 9 so this is our 4th year together. A quick little history between us before I share the next part : I hated my teacher in yr 9 and was a pain in the ass student bcos he used to blame me for my other friend sat next to me who shares the same name, however in yr20 and upwards I really liked him (teacher wise) and I generally couldn't think of a better teacher and we have a fair few jokes together.

    Now onto the story - Basically in 6th form this girl who was in a different math class for gcse is with me for maths a level as there is only 1 class and we are the only 2 girls. Obvs I have had this teacher for awhile so I am confident with answering in class and can easily have a joke, however when he gives our homeworks or tests back he will give a passing comment as he hands them back (e.g. well done / next time come and see me if you are stuck). The other day the other girl in my math class spoke to me about my maths teacher and feels like I should report him as he is 'too close and personal with me and spends a lot of time when giving my work back and my pat my shoulder or nudge me to say well done', she also thinks that he is very very personal considering there should be a teacher student boundary especially with him being male and me female. I personally don't think anything is wrong with this however I am quite oblivious to these kinds of things and bcos I have known him for awhile I probably don't realise.

    I am just looking for everyones advice ! Thanks!
    Did you make two threads on this topic on the same day?
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    (Original post by Bio 7)
    Did you make two threads on this topic on the same day?
    yeah, it wouldnt post at first
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    Unless he is making you uncomfortable, then you have no reason to report hin. That's a serious allegation to make against a teacher and it can affect his whole career. If your friend is uncomfortable with his pats on the back etc then she can ask him politely not to do that anymore. But from what you've said it sounds like he only does it to you and the students he actually knows, so he isn't breaking any boundaries.

    Teachers are allowed to give you a pat or a nudge or even a hug when you're upset or to congratulate you. They're allowed to say hi if you bump into them on the high street. They're allowed to ask how you're doing, what you did on the weekend or even about your hobbies. If he is asking for your mobile number or contacting you on social media or asking to see you outside of school or touching you inappropriately then you have good reason to tell someone. If not, then leave him alone and tell your friend she's making a very serious accusation.
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    (Original post by Petulia)
    Unless he is making you uncomfortable, then you have no reason to report hin. That's a serious allegation to make against a teacher and it can affect his whole career. If your friend is uncomfortable with his pats on the back etc then she can ask him politely not to do that anymore. But from what you've said it sounds like he only does it to you and the students he actually knows, so he isn't breaking any boundaries.

    Teachers are allowed to give you a pat or a nudge or even a hug when you're upset or to congratulate you. They're allowed to say hi if you bump into them on the high street. They're allowed to ask how you're doing, what you did on the weekend or even about your hobbies. If he is asking for your mobile number or contacting you on social media or asking to see you outside of school or touching you inappropriately then you have good reason to tell someone. If not, then leave him alone and tell your friend she's making a very serious accusation.
    respect that
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    Oh the poor male teachers
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    (Original post by PhilDanthropist)
    Oh the poor male teachers
    ik
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    Actually I want to know the boundaries... can you be friends with teachers?
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    (Original post by PhilDanthropist)
    Actually I want to know the boundaries... can you be friends with teachers?
    Nope.

    You can be friendly with them, but not friends. Your teachers are worrying about presenting their result curves, mortgages, relationships, student loan repayments; lots of things that would be inappropriate to discuss with students. There's always going to be distance between teachers and students.
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    (Original post by Langerhan)
    Nope.

    You can be friendly with them, but not friends. Your teachers are worrying about presenting their result curves, mortgages, relationships, student loan repayments; lots of things that would be inappropriate to discuss with students. There's always going to be distance between teachers and students.
    Wait but what if teacher discusses their relationships with a student.. I read thread on here where it sounds like student is friends with a teacher...
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    (Original post by PhilDanthropist)
    Wait but what if teacher discusses their relationships with a student.. I read thread on here where it sounds like student is friends with a teacher...
    my teacher discusses all of the above, they are allowed. I just think it can't be an unprofessional friendship
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    my teacher discusses all of the above, they are allowed. I just think it can't be an unprofessional friendship
    Yh I get on amazingly well with one teacher and he discusses loads of stuff nothing to do with the subject he teaches
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    (Original post by PhilDanthropist)
    Yh I get on amazingly well with one teacher and he discusses loads of stuff nothing to do with the subject he teaches
    I think boundaries are taken too far now. I had a one on one with my male maths teacher and I asked to close the door as it was noisy outside and he said that he wasn't allowed too due to him being with a female student in the room
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I think boundaries are taken too far now. I had a one on one with my male maths teacher and I asked to close the door as it was noisy outside and he said that he wasn't allowed too due to him being with a female student in the room
    What the HELL!! nah the male teacher always closes the door coz he has an office and it gets quite noisy
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    (Original post by PhilDanthropist)
    What the HELL!! nah the male teacher always closes the door coz he has an office and it gets quite noisy
    yh apparently if a male teacher is on a one on one with a female student they are suppose to keep the door open
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yh apparently if a male teacher is on a one on one with a female student they are suppose to keep the door open
    Might be different for different schools i guess but i know it is frowned upon
 
 
 
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