Okay this is going to be a bit tricky to explain.
When I was in my first year of secondary school I met this girl through mutual friends, let's call her L.
So me and L become that weird kind of friend where your only friendly with this person because they're in your friendship group,
But from pretty early on L became very possessive of me.
She always wanted to sit next to me in class and declare herself my best friend even thought I didn't feel that strongly about our friendship, but it didn't bother me too much.
L was very loud and rude a lot of the time, putting people down and seemed to think she was better then other people all the time.
I remember my birthday that first year she and another friend came over and she was quite rude to both of us and said things like I'm going to win this game because we can't sing (it was a singing game) and left us to go do something else, which I think my other friend found a bit rude at the time.
Anyway, the next year L's possessiveness got even worse,
We went to Alton towers once and L was so angry she hadn't been invited (I could take 1 friend and she was mad it wasn't her I picked) she was so angry she got her mum to phone my mum and forced her to take L with us, (in the end L's mum had to pay because that was the reason I could only take 1 friend) and while we were at Alton towers L bullied herself next to me on all rides so my other friend had to sit alone the whole time. This kind of behaviour was the norm for L.
The next few years got worse and worse, L started making fun of me for mental health issues I was having, and she would then turn around and pretend to have the same issues just worse,
she pretended to self harm and have hallucinations like I did at that time,
and once even tried to tell me that the person I hallucinated had spent the last day with her and had kissed her? Bareing in mind we were about 14 at the time. So she was old enough to know better in my opinion.
L started getting worse with the 'coping'
She would steal clothes from my closet when she came round and wear them herself and said they were hers,
She cut her hair like mine and dyed it the same colour,
If I liked a boy she would go after them and once told me she had kissed a guy I was interested in first, and told me after we got together.
She hacked my Facebook account once and sent a lot of weird messaged to a guy I had fancied and the result was he wouldn't speak to me again,
She turned things into 'her things'
Like red hair was 'her thing'
Alice in wonderland became 'her thing'
Things I would be intersted in would suddenly become her things and she was very aggressive about it and that I was copying her? When looking back I suspect she was copying me.
The ultimate thing that happened for me in all of this is she would call me fat, ugly, my nose was too big, I was too tall, my breath smelt, I couldn't do make up right, my clothes were horrible, ect and it all shook on my self esteem pretty badly at the time
I couldn't seem to get away from her, she took the same GSCE subjects as me and then the same a level subjects at the same college too, when I moved subjects so did she,
It honestly felt like I couldn't get away from her at the time and the whole while she was making me feel awful about myself while doing the same things as me with hair colour, clothe types, ect.
This whole time she's been rubbing it in anyone who will listens face that she has serious mental health issues and I don't,
When I got diagnosed with Bipolar and psychosis suddenly she had schizophrenia, when I had been self harm free for 6 months she really threw in my face she had been seriously hurting herself and showing me 'scars' which just seemed like scratches and ruler indents, stuff like that, like she's trying to one up me or that's how it feels?
Then I was attacked on the street by a girl who dated my ex, it was nasty there was a group of them attacking me, and when I told L about it she said I was exaggerating things and that nothing like that happened and carried up that type of talk even when they started regularly attacking me and I had to get police involved, a few years later I found out she was friends with this girl who was doing it the whole time.
I finally got away from her when I move house I just cut contact last year.
But it's all coming back because she now works with my Boyfriends sisters in the same shop, she found out a few weeks ago and started messaging me on Fb says she's really close to them and I'm a little nervous,
He knows all about it and what she did to me in school and afterwards. I never introduced them because of what's happened in the past with boys,
But I'm looking back at what happened and I cant tell if I'm just being weird about it or if she really was an abusive friend ?
Turn on thread page Beta
Is this an abusive friend? watch
- Thread Starter
- 27-02-2018 18:09
- 28-02-2018 11:56
Yes, she was abusive. She is manipulative, obsessive, ignorant and a bully. I'd stay away from her as much as possible, at least your boyfriend (and hopefully his sister) know about her past and what she's done.
- 28-02-2018 12:29
Block her in every way possible, stay away from her. What a toxic person.