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    Today I confronted a flatmate for continuously leaving mess in the bathroom. I didn’t really want to share bathrooms however I was unlucky to get an accomodation with shared bathrooms. I contacted the girl today just politely asking if she could be cleaner. I have repeatedly gone in to the bathroom where there are crap stains and menstraul stains on the toilet seat. She constantly doesn’t flush the toilet and I have seen more of her own ****s than I have my own. I messaged her today asking if she could start wiping down the toilet and flushing every time she goes. I finally hit my final straw after I went to the toilet and the entire toilet was covered in blood. I understand that biology is biology but manners and consideration just isn’t hard to grasp. I then messaged her telling her to please just clean. She replied claiming that she was embarrassed and sorry. I said it was fine and to just be clean. About 3 hours later I went into the bathroom to take a shower and there was a used sanitary towel wrapped in toilet role left on the toilet seat. The used sanitary towel is still there and I have no idea what to say to her. Nothing I say tends to sink in. She lacks all consideration for everyone and this stems to every communal area in the house. It’s frustrating as she is a 21 year old woman and is incapable of having respect for herself but consideration for those who else has to use the areas. I would be mortified if someone said that I left a crap in the toilet. I just don’t know how to react now.
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    try sitting her down face to face and talking
    then if she isn't clean try leaving a post it note or two in the bathroom like on the sink and on the handle, this is what my aunt did to train her kids to may work with her
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    dump the sanitary towel by her door?

    I would call a flat meeting and discuss with everyone how she keeps leaving period blood and poo in the toilet - perhaps some public shame will do a better job?

    You could always try putting signs up by the toilet but frankly who doesn't notice a toilet full of blood? I think it's clear she just isn't bothered.

    You could also start taking photos of the mess (I know it's gross) and when you have 10+ send them to the management. I'd guess they'll come down harshly on her since they really won't want to keep dealing with such a thing.
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    (Original post by ChocOrange98)
    Today I confronted a flatmate for continuously leaving mess in the bathroom. I didn’t really want to share bathrooms however I was unlucky to get an accomodation with shared bathrooms. I contacted the girl today just politely asking if she could be cleaner. I have repeatedly gone in to the bathroom where there are crap stains and menstraul stains on the toilet seat. She constantly doesn’t flush the toilet and I have seen more of her own shits than I have my own. I messaged her today asking if she could start wiping down the toilet and flushing every time she goes. I finally hit my final straw after I went to the toilet and the entire toilet was covered in blood. I understand that biology is biology but manners and consideration just isn’t hard to grasp. I then messaged her telling her to please just clean. She replied claiming that she was embarrassed and sorry. I said it was fine and to just be clean. About 3 hours later I went into the bathroom to take a shower and there was a used sanitary towel wrapped in toilet role left on the toilet seat. The used sanitary towel is still there and I have no idea what to say to her. Nothing I say tends to sink in. She lacks all consideration for everyone and this stems to every communal area in the house. It’s frustrating as she is a 21 year old woman and is incapable of having respect for herself but consideration for those who else has to use the areas. I would be mortified if someone said that I left a crap in the toilet. I just don’t know how to react now.


    Take a picture of the mess she leaves with your phone, transfer it to a PC and write the caption by it "PLEASE CLEAR UP YOUR MESS" and start sticking it on her door with bluetac

    If that does not shame her into doing something about it, nothing will....
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    Get gloves, pick up the pad and leave it by her door with a notice for her to clean up after herself.

    If she doesnt improve, just wait for the day she leaves a mess then go call someone from management to have a look. That should do the trick.
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    Community Assistant
    I agree with other posters. Take photos of her mess each time she leaves it, and email them to management saying you've tried to tell her to clean up but she refuses to. As for the mess she leaves, get a bag and gloves and put it all in there and outside her door. I would also start disturbing her too - if she's in her room and you go in the bathroom and see mess, knock on her door until she comes out and cleans it up. And I would do as others have said, print out the pictures of the mess and stick them on doors saying clean it up. She's obviously had a cushy life of other people cleaning up after her and doesn't realise the cleaning fairy didn't move with her to uni.
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    By your description, that is worse than almost all public male restrooms I've been to. Here I thought girls were all clean and tidy creatures. I say report her stinky ass!
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    (Original post by ChocOrange98)
    ...and there was a used sanitary towel wrapped in toilet role left on the toilet seat. The used sanitary towel is still there..
    Snapchat it.
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    Is it just the two of you sharing this bathroom, or are there other people too?
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    I second the advice about taking pictures of the mess. You might need it if it come to raising complaints. People sometimes deny having caused any issues...when that happens you will have the evidence to back up your claims.
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    I don't think you should public-shame her as this could turn around on you -you could be called a bully ! Are you sure it's her? Is someone else maybe doing it to make you think it's her ? Are you being dramatic ? If you have conversated with her face to face in private then there's not change then unfortunately you will just have to make do with the situation . Don't become a bully
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    I think you should complain to your landlord because it's obvious now that she's not listening to you, and you have asked her nicely several times. Just call up or send a text to your landlord saying you have concerns about the way one of the others is leaving the toilet (constantly stained etc) and she is not listening to your complaints. Once the landlord confronts her about it she's likely to feel embarrassed or scared of losing her tenancy and will probably clean up her act.

    Also see if you could bring it up with the other flat mates? And also next time you see a mess in there, knock on her door and tell her she needs to clean it. You shouldn't be touching any of that mess yourself.
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    (Original post by Petulia)
    And also next time you see a mess in there, knock on her door and tell her she needs to clean it. You shouldn't be touching any of that mess yourself.
    I think that this is what I would do. She clearly can ignore virtual representations of her mess, but if you knock on her door and say "please can you clean up the bathroom because I want to use it and I cannot in the present state" - you will be disturbing her. Surely once she has been disturbed she will start to clean up just because it will make life easier for her.

    She clearly does not clean up after herself because of the normal social rules i.e. desire to keep personal hygiene issues personal or out of respect for other people. I cannot believe that her family have allowed her to be so disgusting.
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    I agree with all the advice about reporting it. I’d just add that I’d tell her first that nothing’s changed after your talk so you’re going to complain and send photos to the management if it continues.
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    (Original post by ollienbert)
    I think that this is what I would do. She clearly can ignore virtual representations of her mess, but if you knock on her door and say "please can you clean up the bathroom because I want to use it and I cannot in the present state" - you will be disturbing her. Surely once she has been disturbed she will start to clean up just because it will make life easier for her.

    She clearly does not clean up after herself because of the normal social rules i.e. desire to keep personal hygiene issues personal or out of respect for other people. I cannot believe that her family have allowed her to be so disgusting.
    I'm sure you're not the only one who has to put up with this. I'd do the above but along with all the other flatmates, so it puts more pressure on her to sort her sh*t out.


    Also take a pic each time she does it to send to the landlord, if she still refuses to clean up.
 
 
 

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