Hi there, for me personally i havent been diagnosed by a professional, however I believe i have a form of OCD known as 'pure-O' OCD. this is essentially where you obsess over scary intrusive thoughts, e.g for me my head would try to convince me horrible things about myself, show me distressing mental images, and also kind of think things that my ocd tried to tell me i 'want' to do. also i think its called intrusive wishes, but e.g my head would say 'i wish ----- would die'. these things were incredibly distressing to me, and i would react by freaking out, ruminating on these thoughts, and also performing internal checks, so if id have an intrusive thought id focus on my emotional & physical response, if i wasnt disgusted id freak out more.
i was unable to focus on any work, and completely lost my sex drive for fear of an intrusive thought popping up.
the stress and guilt over these thoughts also made me incredibly run down, id regularly have diarrhoea, or nearly throw up. id pick at the skin on my fingers till i bleed, and scratch all over my scalp, leading it to sting and bleed.
for me the main thing that has helped me are distractions, like watching youtube videos, listening to music etc. anything to try and cover over the thoughts. also learning about ocd, and hearing other peoples stories really helped me to realise i wasnt something horrible, its a mental illness. there are some really great resources online.
id also just like to stress that you can have intrusive thoughts about so many things, murder, harming others, distressing thoughts( e.g incest, paedophillia), blasphemous religious thoughts etc. because for so long i struggled with how scary my thoughts were and was completely unable to open up or even search online for help incase someone thought i was something bad, but there is help out there, trust me.
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O.C.D what is it like? Please comment if you have experienced it! watch
- 06-03-2018 18:47
- 06-03-2018 19:08
Switches being on with nothing plugged in. Back in school I'd go around my classrooms turning off taps or flicking switches off.
- Thread Starter
- 06-03-2018 19:27
Last edited by Bio 7; 06-03-2018 at 20:54. Reason: TDA Post Edit
- 06-03-2018 19:37
- 06-03-2018 20:00
I'm not full on OCD, like washing my hands and drying them ritualistically twenty-three times before I can consider them clean.
But It's been suggested[*] by a senior consultant clinical psychotherapist that I do have mild, functional (ie it doesn't unduly effect my life) OCD.
For example in my kitchen. I have a three shelved spice/herb rack. Mixes have to all go on the top shelf, spices have to go in the middle one, dried herbs have to go on the bottom. They have to be in alphabetical order, with the label facing straight forward.
The door of the fridge is where I keep milk, juices, and condiments. The shelves have to be ordered by height, tallest closest to the hinge, shortest furthest from the hinge. Again, with the labels facing straight forward.
I know this is irrational. I'm well aware it's a ridiculous silly need. But it's not a matter of aesthetics, or logic, it just feels so wrong, if things aren't placed a certain way.
No idea why this (kitchen is just one example) is a thing. Cant put a finger on when it started, but probably after I first moved out of home. Some would just consider it a quirk, a mild character flaw, rather than medicalize it.
[ * ie, made it clear it was just his opinion, based on the time spent with us talking privately, without a true diagnostic taken in a clinical setting he wasn't willing to give a true professional explonation ]Last edited by 303Pharma; 06-03-2018 at 20:13. Reason: psychotherapist, not psychologist
OCD is akin to a fog in my mind. I have to do things in odd numbers like touch things 3 times and I’m actually afraid of even numbers because I think something bad will happen to my family or I think intrusive thoughts like they are a pedophile even though I know no one in my family is. I question reality, like once I woke up and my legs were numb and felt spaced out, and I convinced myself I’d been raped and pregnant, even though I’m a virgin and no one could have gotten into my house I’m sure. I question if family members or men in public have felt me up even though I know they haven’t. It’s a constant torment and I like awake saying to myself, He’s not this and she’s not, convincing myself that unless I say that then the intrusive thoughts are facts.