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How to lose weight and become good looking watch

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    (Original post by Fizzy98)
    Just saying that I think ur trying to lose weight for all the wrong reasons. Losing weight won’t make you find love or be happy. Losing weight to be healthy is the main thing, not to be more attractive. Also just bc ur overweight doesn’t mean you have to date an overweight person lol, I’m chubby and my boyfriend is slim / muscly and he loves my body!!! Someone will for you too.
    Why? Good health is closely correlated with attractiveness. I see no reason why attractiveness should not be a primary motivator. Some people do have a preference for differing body types but by and large being in shape will make you more attractive. The health benefits are an additional reason to pursue it.
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    (Original post by TCA2b)
    Looking healthy and attractiveness are closely correlated, and for good reason.
    Indeed. That's pretty much why I asked both of these questions in the OP.

    I still have no idea what to do in terms of attractiveness. I would like to have people interested in me, even if they were girls as that would be reassuring more than anything else. 1 compliment in 16 years doesn't cut it at all. I am really jealous of guys who are easy on the eye.
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    (Original post by Joe2001)
    What about becoming attractive? How do I improve my looks and be as good looking as I can? Ultimately I want to feel attractive. Personality isn't enough for me, and even then, I am a bit introvert anyway.
    I can totally relate to that. Ultimately, I've no idea what you look like, but being fit will help with facial attractiveness (in terms of facial definition), as will a good skincare regime and avoiding excessive sun exposure (not to mention such crap as tanning beds.) A good diet will help with keeping your skin clear too, as will limiting sugar and alcohol consumption; I think bad, damaged skin is a primary cause of why some people look bad even as young as their 30s or 40s. Beyond that, it is down to how you style your hair and dress, whether facial hair works for you or not, etc. Personality does matter but guys are pretty visual and if there's no basis for attraction, it won't really salvage the situation. I certainly wouldn't disregard looks just because I liked someone's personality and it'd be hypocritical of me to pretend that others should. Admittedly I place highest emphasis on decent facial traits.
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    (Original post by TCA2b)
    I can totally relate to that. Ultimately, I've no idea what you look like, but being fit will help with facial attractiveness (in terms of facial definition), as will a good skincare regime and avoiding excessive sun exposure (not to mention such crap as tanning beds.) A good diet will help with keeping your skin clear too, as will limiting sugar and alcohol consumption; I think bad, damaged skin is a primary cause of why some people look bad even as young as their 30s or 40s. Beyond that, it is down to how you style your hair and dress, whether facial hair works for you or not, etc. Personality does matter but guys are pretty visual and if there's no basis for attraction, it won't really salvage the situation. I certainly wouldn't disregard looks just because I liked someone's personality and it'd be hypocritical of me to pretend that others should.
    Skin is definitely key to being good good looking, so I will need to work on that, but even in other ways, I still don't feel right. I can't stand my hair or eyes, and I don't really care about clothes on a regular day.

    Need to start preparing for my life being single. If anyone said that they found me attractive, I would not believe them.
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    That ultimately resolves more to psychology than anything else. If you convince yourself you’re irredeemably unattractive it’ll become a self fulfilling prophecy. It’s better to have realistic expectations. Even attractive people can convince themselves they’re ugly and become their own worst enemy.

    What is it you dislike about your traits? Clothes are secondary, just mentioning them as they can accentuate your looks.
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    At the end of the day each person is attracted to different things .. it’s not like there’s only one perceive image of an attractive guy or girl. However in saying that there’s probably things you could do to get out more in the gay community .. would just like to say I’m not gay myself and I don’t want to offend anyone this is just general tips.

    Building on the skin thing if you display more confidence I think that attracts people. You said yourself your an introvert.. is there a reason for that? Push your comfort zones out, do some activities and stuff you may meet someone this way. Shy people don’t often get approached because they can give off a certain kind of demeanour. I wouldn’t approach someone who sat at the side because I wouldn’t know what the reason is, I don’t know your shy I might think you’ve already got a bf or you don’t want to be approached by someone. It’s all about body language and confidence.

    Be more trendy. Dress up in current trends .. what’s in at the moment. The way you dress will attract a certain kind of person. A hipster may be attracted to another hipster and a smartly dressed person likewise. Obv this isn’t a standard statement but most likely someone may approach you if you exhume confidence.

    In all honesty just get out there. Speak to people in the gay community. Maybe they have some tips. Go to gay bars and clubs more likely to meet somewhere there. I think right now your just unhappy because someone’s not approached you or because your not in the right places. Like if I went to a gay club when I’m straight .. most likely I won’t be approached ( although I know straight people go) just go have fun. Relationships don’t define you as a person. Be happy and whatever happens happens! You never know you may meet someone in the gym 😂😏
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    (Original post by TCA2b)
    That ultimately resolves more to psychology than anything else. If you convince yourself you’re irredeemably unattractive it’ll become a self fulfilling prophecy. It’s better to have realistic expectations. Even attractive people can convince themselves they’re ugly and become their own worst enemy.

    What is it you dislike about your traits? Clothes are secondary, just mentioning them as they can accentuate your looks.
    I cannot pinpoint what I don't like, I just don't like it at all. I know that even the best looking of people can feel like this, but I really don't feel right. I see other guys and am really jealous of their looks. I suppose no one has ever really commented on my looks in a positive way either (my mother doesn't count).
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    (Original post by rhussain1)
    At the end of the day each person is attracted to different things .. it’s not like there’s only one perceive image of an attractive guy or girl. However in saying that there’s probably things you could do to get out more in the gay community .. would just like to say I’m not gay myself and I don’t want to offend anyone this is just general tips.

    Building on the skin thing if you display more confidence I think that attracts people. You said yourself your an introvert.. is there a reason for that? Push your comfort zones out, do some activities and stuff you may meet someone this way. Shy people don’t often get approached because they can give off a certain kind of demeanour. I wouldn’t approach someone who sat at the side because I wouldn’t know what the reason is, I don’t know your shy I might think you’ve already got a bf or you don’t want to be approached by someone. It’s all about body language and confidence.

    Be more trendy. Dress up in current trends .. what’s in at the moment. The way you dress will attract a certain kind of person. A hipster may be attracted to another hipster and a smartly dressed person likewise. Obv this isn’t a standard statement but most likely someone may approach you if you exhume confidence.

    In all honesty just get out there. Speak to people in the gay community. Maybe they have some tips. Go to gay bars and clubs more likely to meet somewhere there. I think right now your just unhappy because someone’s not approached you or because your not in the right places. Like if I went to a gay club when I’m straight .. most likely I won’t be approached ( although I know straight people go) just go have fun. Relationships don’t define you as a person. Be happy and whatever happens happens! You never know you may meet someone in the gym 😂😏
    Answering your question about being an introvert - It's always been in my nature to be a bit shy, and I have struggled with friendships, including being "friends" with an extremely horrible person who has caused 4.5 years of absolute misery and as a result, my social confidence has been tainted.

    I am 16, and my parents don't know my sexuality. I would rather that they found out from someone else (even via social media), but until they know, I can't really go out on the gay scene. I would love to, but will wait until uni.

    Again, whilst living with parents, it's hard to really adopt a dress style, especially when your father cracks jokes at your expense about things like clothes and hair. I really just wear T-Shirts and tracksuits, unless I am at school. My school uniform is actually something that I do value as I feel it can make me look smart, so maybe investing in some smarter clothes may help
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    (Original post by Joe2001)
    Answering your question about being an introvert - It's always been in my nature to be a bit shy, and I have struggled with friendships, including being "friends" with an extremely horrible person who has caused 4.5 years of absolute misery and as a result, my social confidence has been tainted.

    I am 16, and my parents don't know my sexuality. I would rather that they found out from someone else (even via social media), but until they know, I can't really go out on the gay scene. I would love to, but will wait until uni.

    Again, whilst living with parents, it's hard to really adopt a dress style, especially when your father cracks jokes at your expense about things like clothes and hair. I really just wear T-Shirts and tracksuits, unless I am at school. My school uniform is actually something that I do value as I feel it can make me look smart, so maybe investing in some smarter clothes may help
    I’m sorry to hear about that :/ didn’t mean it in a rude way at all. I hope everything works out for you. Is talking to your parents about coming out not a possibility? Maybe they already know
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    (Original post by rhussain1)
    I’m sorry to hear about that :/ didn’t mean it in a rude way at all. I hope everything works out for you. Is talking to your parents about coming out not a possibility? Maybe they already know
    Not offended at all, don't worry!

    My parents are Catholic, and my dad doesn't seem to view homosexuality in a positive light. It's not a conversation that I want to have with them as I'm not sure how it would go. They may have been suspicious of it at some point (once my dad told me to stop watching Strictly while his friend was in, implying it was too gay) and when I was younger, I was quite vocal about my dislike for masculinity and traditional male interests.
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    If you want some motivation I find the Fat People Hate threads on 4chan /fit/ board extremely good motivators. It may be too harsh for your taste but remember the end goal.
    Good luck with your life man.
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    (Original post by Joe2001)
    I cannot pinpoint what I don't like, I just don't like it at all. I know that even the best looking of people can feel like this, but I really don't feel right. I see other guys and am really jealous of their looks. I suppose no one has ever really commented on my looks in a positive way either (my mother doesn't count).
    Again, even people who are quite objectively good looking often see inadequacies in themselves and feel such envy. I get it, but you do have to get a grip over it and not let it control you because there is fundamentally little you can do about it, barring some futuristic body swapping tech.

    Ultimately I would recommend you seek a psychologist to get to the bottom of it, and if you're not suffering from something such as body dysmorphia, consider your options from there. It's impossible to tell how much of it is in your mind without seeing pics, to be truthful. Still, sticking to a few simple things like those mentioned in the thread would probably make you happier and more confident in yourself, as a starting point.

    (Original post by Joe2001)
    Not offended at all, don't worry!

    My parents are Catholic, and my dad doesn't seem to view homosexuality in a positive light. It's not a conversation that I want to have with them as I'm not sure how it would go. They may have been suspicious of it at some point (once my dad told me to stop watching Strictly while his friend was in, implying it was too gay) and when I was younger, I was quite vocal about my dislike for masculinity and traditional male interests.
    I mean if you're into guys, do you really have a dislike for masculinity? Or just the usual "blokish" stereotypes? There's a difference. If you think it'd strain relations with them, wait until you're on a stronger footing before discussing it.
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    (Original post by TCA2b)
    I mean if you're into guys, do you really have a dislike for masculinity? Or just the usual "blokish" stereotypes? There's a difference. If you think it'd strain relations with them, wait until you're on a stronger footing before discussing it.
    I will read the first part of your post in a few moments, but to clarify, it is the blokeish stereotypes that I dislike. Not a fan of them whatsoever. I'm not attracted to overly masculine guys either.
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    (Original post by Joe2001)
    Sorry if I am asking too many questions on this forum, but I need to talk to people, so here I am!

    I am a 16 year old guy and have been overweight for several years. I am fed up with it and want to change, especially because I want to get a boyfriend in the not too distant future. I wouldn't want to date an overweight person, so ultimately I need to lose weight myself before putting myself on the market. In addition, I want to be good looking and generally attractive. I am worried that this may hold me back.

    Does anyone have some tips?

    Thanks!

    Its not tips you need, but a good understanding of how weight loss works. Go and join MFP and read the stickies. Getting fit is optional.
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    I sometimes am, but equally very feminine ones turn me off so quickly.
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    Look into Medical Medium
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    (Original post by TCA2b)
    Again, even people who are quite objectively good looking often see inadequacies in themselves and feel such envy. I get it, but you do have to get a grip over it and not let it control you because there is fundamentally little you can do about it, barring some futuristic body swapping tech.

    Ultimately I would recommend you seek a psychologist to get to the bottom of it, and if you're not suffering from something such as body dysmorphia, consider your options from there. It's impossible to tell how much of it is in your mind without seeing pics, to be truthful. Still, sticking to a few simple things like those mentioned in the thread would probably make you happier and more confident in yourself, as a starting point.
    I can't see a psychologist without my parents knowing, and they are the last people that I would talk to about anything. I've had way too much crap going on in my personal life in the last 7 months and they know very little of it.

    Hopefully there will be a way to become a good looking guy as I get older. It's not about confidence either, as I find overly confident people to be a turn off, especially if their confidence is not justified.
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    My one tip is to find things that you personally value so then it'll be incredibly easy. Find healthy foods you like, find a sport you love, and it'll be soooooo easy.
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    Right, well wait until later on then when it becomes a more practical option. Out of curiosity, why would they need to know? E.g. if it's a school psychologist, are they obliged to inform them? If so, do they need to divulge the specific contents of what's discussed?

    My point is simply that it'd be best to clear up any psychological hang ups or issues before considering options like surgery, which really are best left until your features - and brain - fully mature. I'm not talking about confidence in the sense of bravado, but rather self-loathing that renders you incapable of assessing yourself on as objective a basis as you can. So stick to small steps like those mentioned in your OP and work from there. And yes, definitely wait and see how your features mature into your 20s.
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    (Original post by unknown_usr)
    My one tip is to find things that you personally value so then it'll be incredibly easy. Find healthy foods you like, find a sport you love, and it'll be soooooo easy.
    I really can't stand sports whatsoever. I quit doing Badminton at school as I couldn't stand the teacher who ran it and because it was full of younger kids, and cycling really loses it's appeal if I am with my dad as I can never keep up and just feel even worse about myself than otherwise.
 
 
 
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