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I Asked Him Out... watch

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    but his response was first to ignore my text, and wait until he next saw me at uni so he could humiliate me in front of everyone and they'd know we definitely weren't 'together'.(There had been heavy flirting prior, and to them we probably kind of looked like we were, or heading that way). He was acting distant, being contemptuous and giving blatant attention to other women in a way that I and others would notice, so that I would feel rubbish and 'get the message'. I guess I'm seeking moral support, here. He seemed to like me for a while, as I say the flirting was noticeable to others, and we had a bit of a friendship before this, so I guess I'm confused and shellshocked at how nasty he has been. The guy is in his late 20s too. Thanks for listening.
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    Wow, it’s impressive how you asked him out! That takes goddamn courage! (I could never do that). He’s an ******* for doing what he did. And you definitely seem like you deserve so much better than him! Take it as a relief that you aren’t going out with him now, cause you wouldn’t wanna be with someone like him.
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    For some reason dating is full of unexpected and unpleasant outcomes. All you can do is dust yourself down and get back in the fray. Something worthwhile turns out in the end.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Wow, it’s impressive how you asked him out! That takes goddamn courage! (I could never do that). He’s an ******* for doing what he did. And you definitely seem like you deserve so much better than him! Take it as a relief that you aren’t going out with him now, cause you wouldn’t wanna be with someone like him.
    Ah thank you! I've been really shocked by his response, even if it was 'no' I thought he'd be nicer. Your post uplifted me x
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    (Original post by Zarek)
    For some reason dating is full of unexpected and unpleasant outcomes. All you can do is dust yourself down and get back in the fray. Something worthwhile turns out in the end.
    The mad thing is he seemed to be the one to like me first, and it was me who had to think about whether I felt the same. Thank you for your encouraging words. This has really helped me, posting here.
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    You don't really expect people to have that attitude by the time they hit University, and it's certainly not a level off immaturity I encountered. On the plus side, you avoided dating somebody who's clearly a terriblly ****ing person, and you'll be better for it.
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    (Original post by PlayWithMarkers)
    You don't really expect people to have that attitude by the time they hit University, and it's certainly not a level off immaturity I encountered. On the plus side, you avoided dating somebody who's clearly a terriblly ****ing person, and you'll be better for it.
    Thank you so much, he shocked me too. Kinda childish, and unkind.
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    It sounds like he flirted with you in order to humiliate you when you took the bait. All I can say, as another has said, you dodged a bullet. I recently asked a guy I liked out on a date, on Valentine's Day as well, and was rejected, yet his response was very mature and considerate of my feelings. If this guy acts this way when someone asks him out then he needs to grow up.

    Find yourself a better man!
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    (Original post by iAngely)
    It sounds like he flirted with you in order to humiliate you when you took the bait. All I can say, as another has said, you dodged a bullet. I recently asked a guy I liked out on a date, on Valentine's Day as well, and was rejected, yet his response was very mature and considerate of my feelings. If this guy acts this way when someone asks him out then he needs to grow up.

    Find yourself a better man!
    Oh wow, I never thought of it like that. It makes sense, though. Like he got a kick out of it. Thank you x
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    (Original post by iAngely)
    It sounds like he flirted with you in order to humiliate you when you took the bait. All I can say, as another has said, you dodged a bullet. I recently asked a guy I liked out on a date, on Valentine's Day as well, and was rejected, yet his response was very mature and considerate of my feelings. If this guy acts this way when someone asks him out then he needs to grow up.

    Find yourself a better man!
    PS: I'm so glad you were treated kindly.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    PS: I'm so glad you were treated kindly.
    Thank you. Honestly, most guys are kind and considerate of your feelings when you ask them out and they reject you, I know from experience, but you were just unlucky on this occasion, yet at the same time, fortunate because you now know what an arse wipe he is. To do that to a supposed friend is disgraceful. I'd say that you patch yourself up and move on, he is not worth getting upset over, and don't let this be a deterrent for asking future guys out; I think they like not having to take the lead all of the time.
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    (Original post by iAngely)
    Thank you. Honestly, most guys are kind and considerate of your feelings when you ask them out and they reject you, I know from experience, but you were just unlucky on this occasion, yet at the same time, fortunate because you now know what an arse wipe he is. To do that to a supposed friend is disgraceful. I'd say that you patch yourself up and move on, he is not worth getting upset over, and don't let this be a deterrent for asking future guys out; I think they like not having to take the lead all of the time.
    Oh totally, there's no excuse. He comes across as so nice as well! I feel so much better after talking to you guys
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    You dodged a bullet! Chin up lovely!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You dodged a bullet! Chin up lovely!
    Thank you so much ☺️ Your responses have really helped me because I've been sooo baffled by this guy.
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    (Original post by iAngely)
    Thank you. Honestly, most guys are kind and considerate of your feelings when you ask them out and they reject you, I know from experience, but you were just unlucky on this occasion, yet at the same time, fortunate because you now know what an arse wipe he is. To do that to a supposed friend is disgraceful. I'd say that you patch yourself up and move on, he is not worth getting upset over, and don't let this be a deterrent for asking future guys out; I think they like not having to take the lead all of the time.
    I was just talking to my dad and I was stunned to hear him say the same as you–that he was a baiter. Wow, we live and learn, right! Thanks again 😊
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    but his response was first to ignore my text, and wait until he next saw me at uni so he could humiliate me in front of everyone and they'd know we definitely weren't 'together'.(There had been heavy flirting prior, and to them we probably kind of looked like we were, or heading that way). He was acting distant, being contemptuous and giving blatant attention to other women in a way that I and others would notice, so that I would feel rubbish and 'get the message'. I guess I'm seeking moral support, here. He seemed to like me for a while, as I say the flirting was noticeable to others, and we had a bit of a friendship before this, so I guess I'm confused and shellshocked at how nasty he has been. The guy is in his late 20s too. Thanks for listening.
    To be honest I think that you've missed out details on purpose. If this guy was acting distant and giving attention to others why would you still bother in asking him out?

    Maybe he was being nice and then you got too needy so he tried to get the message out that he doesn't like you but since you didn't get it he did it in another way. Could you explain how he humiliated you? Did he make a big scene as soon as he saw you? Did you approach him or did he approach you?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was just talking to my dad and I was stunned to hear him say the same as you–that he was a baiter. Wow, we live and learn, right! Thanks again 😊
    You're welcome! Let's hope this doesn't happen again. Luckily for you these types of guys are few and far between.
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    (Original post by AspiringUnderdog)
    To be honest I think that you've missed out details on purpose. If this guy was acting distant and giving attention to others why would you still bother in asking him out?

    Maybe he was being nice and then you got too needy so he tried to get the message out that he doesn't like you but since you didn't get it he did it in another way. Could you explain how he humiliated you? Did he make a big scene as soon as he saw you? Did you approach him or did he approach you?
    In her defense, why would he ignore her text and then openly reject her in front of everyone? Wouldn't he take the easier route and just reply with "sorry I don't feel the same way" through text instead of flirting with other girls in front of her? He did that for a desired reaction, that's why.
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    (Original post by iAngely)
    In her defense, why would he ignore her text and then openly reject her in front of everyone? Wouldn't he take the easier route and just reply with "sorry I don't feel the same way" through text instead of flirting with other girls in front of her? He did that for a desired reaction, that's why.
    I'd just like to start off by thanking you for not insulting me as my message could have been seen as offensive.

    Also we don't know the story properly. Flirting with girls while she happens to be around is not the same as flirting with girls in front of her. If they have the same lectures or seminars for example then he shouldn't have to hold back just because someone else that likes him is in the room. Also we still don't know how the event of rejection turned out. He could have just said no to her to make it proper or shouted loud to embarrass her.
    Unless we know the truth we can't judge properly for or against her side I suppose.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thank you so much ☺️ Your responses have really helped me because I've been sooo baffled by this guy.
    No problem!
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