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is he worth it or shall i give it up???? watch

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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    So there's this guy that I've had a massive history with, 3 years ago we both liked each other but then it went downhill because his friends teased him a lot and we just drifted apart. Eventually, we argued and he spread a lot of rumours. The summer after he apologised and we were friends again.

    Then he went out with my best friend but we still spoke and we became so close that we started talking much more than him and my best friend, my feelings for him were still there and I think he still felt stuff too as he said 'you mean the world to me' 'i need you' 'every little thing you do now and then just builds up to mean everything' 'youre perfect' but then we fell out AGAIN.

    This time we didn't make up, but I told him I liked him at the time we had GCSEs going on so he told me to focus on the exams because I had good things going for me at the time. (And I did!! Me and him both got the highest achieving results).

    Now this guy has glown up a lot, he's now one of the really popular kids and he's gone 1000x more attractive so everybody who told me he was ugly and questioned why I liked him before, now finds him attractive too, but to me hes just the same lovely guy.

    Anyway, we've started talking again as friends, at first my friend was talking to him even though she knew about the way I felt towards him but then she started being horrible to me and he found out about her being horrible to me and cut her off. I was going to stop talking to him too but the day after we discussed it he said 'are you really gonna go?' like he actually cared so we're still talking.

    When he was talking to her (it was for 2 months) he never opened up about ANYTHING but with me he's told me personal stuff about his family and himself and I've been close to sharing some of my personal stuff too. He even complimented me and said I was best dressed and this awards evening we attended and we were texting each other during that event even though we were only a few steps away, we've had some chemistry between us. For e.g. once we were with some friends but he was just staring at me so i said 'what?' and took a step back but he took a step forward and tilted his head to the side which was really cute but we were seriously close.

    Other good stuff that has happened is that I'm close with his mum so that's always good, he's taken a few of my advice towards his problems but they're proper life changing advices and he still did it (like moving out of his moms house, i suggested that because they argued quite a bit). I've visited him at work before too and he snapped me after saying "it was really nice to see you x", one of my friends even caught him staring at me and this went on for a whole day because me and him both had free periods all day since lessons were cancelled.

    Along all of this amazing stuff that's happening, recently he's been taking a while to respond to my snaps and stuff, it worries me incase I don't mean much to him or he's starting to lose interest in the friendship, this 'while' for him to respond consists of sometimes over nearly half a day but then at other times he responds within seconds, so it's just confusing.

    I really do like him but I'm confused on what to think, I came up with the idea of telling him I'm going to take a break off social media since we have mock exams coming up and I'm able to talk to him after that (10 days of not talking), this would mean he might find it weird that we dont talk (since we've been talking everyday for nearly four months now) and then when we start talking again, maybe he'll put more effort in how long he takes to reply or something??

    I'm open to any more suggestions or ideas anybody has about this situation, thank you in advance
    • Very Important Poster
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    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So there's this guy that I've had a massive history with, 3 years ago we both liked each other but then it went downhill because his friends teased him a lot and we just drifted apart. Eventually, we argued and he spread a lot of rumours. The summer after he apologised and we were friends again.

    Then he went out with my best friend but we still spoke and we became so close that we started talking much more than him and my best friend, my feelings for him were still there and I think he still felt stuff too as he said 'you mean the world to me' 'i need you' 'every little thing you do now and then just builds up to mean everything' 'youre perfect' but then we fell out AGAIN.

    This time we didn't make up, but I told him I liked him at the time we had GCSEs going on so he told me to focus on the exams because I had good things going for me at the time. (And I did!! Me and him both got the highest achieving results).

    Now this guy has glown up a lot, he's now one of the really popular kids and he's gone 1000x more attractive so everybody who told me he was ugly and questioned why I liked him before, now finds him attractive too, but to me hes just the same lovely guy.

    Anyway, we've started talking again as friends, at first my friend was talking to him even though she knew about the way I felt towards him but then she started being horrible to me and he found out about her being horrible to me and cut her off. I was going to stop talking to him too but the day after we discussed it he said 'are you really gonna go?' like he actually cared so we're still talking.

    When he was talking to her (it was for 2 months) he never opened up about ANYTHING but with me he's told me personal stuff about his family and himself and I've been close to sharing some of my personal stuff too. He even complimented me and said I was best dressed and this awards evening we attended and we were texting each other during that event even though we were only a few steps away, we've had some chemistry between us. For e.g. once we were with some friends but he was just staring at me so i said 'what?' and took a step back but he took a step forward and tilted his head to the side which was really cute but we were seriously close.

    Other good stuff that has happened is that I'm close with his mum so that's always good, he's taken a few of my advice towards his problems but they're proper life changing advices and he still did it (like moving out of his moms house, i suggested that because they argued quite a bit). I've visited him at work before too and he snapped me after saying "it was really nice to see you x", one of my friends even caught him staring at me and this went on for a whole day because me and him both had free periods all day since lessons were cancelled.

    Along all of this amazing stuff that's happening, recently he's been taking a while to respond to my snaps and stuff, it worries me incase I don't mean much to him or he's starting to lose interest in the friendship, this 'while' for him to respond consists of sometimes over nearly half a day but then at other times he responds within seconds, so it's just confusing.

    I really do like him but I'm confused on what to think, I came up with the idea of telling him I'm going to take a break off social media since we have mock exams coming up and I'm able to talk to him after that (10 days of not talking), this would mean he might find it weird that we dont talk (since we've been talking everyday for nearly four months now) and then when we start talking again, maybe he'll put more effort in how long he takes to reply or something??

    I'm open to any more suggestions or ideas anybody has about this situation, thank you in advance
    I read it all....


    Is this year 12?

    D any exams take a real break and see how you feel. he isnt going anywhere.

    If you want to go out after then just tell him you like him and suggest a few dates. he either says yes or no. If he comes up with reasons not to then he isnt that keen and tbh you can save yourself an awful lot of hassle by just ending it.

    If you want to carry on as you are, then thats up to you, but seems a lot of energy and not going anywhere.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    yeah we're in year 12 now and honestly, i think im always going to like him but i do realise he isnt good for me, i feel like i should move on personally plus he really gives me a bunch of hassle as you've mentioned AND now after dumping all of his personal problems on me, he goes and IGNORES ME??? when i asked a relevant question about maths as well, so ugh he just plays with my head and i cant be bothered with it anymore. Do you have any good ways of moving on?? and you are COMPLETELY right, i'm putting in so much energy into something that most likely isn't going to go anywhere
    • #2
    #2

    He could be playing around the field tbh. I mean if he's as attractive as you say he is and he's popular, there could be a chance he's talking to other girls as well and that is why he's giving you mixed signals. I would say that you should straight up ask him what he wants with you. You guys have been friends for a long time now and I think it would not be a huge deal if you asked him if he has any feelings towards you. 4 months is quite long to be talking, unless he just sees you as a best friend or something of that sort. But honestly, some guys don't know what they want either so he could be indecisive but you won't know unless you ask him. Take a break from talking to him to see if he reaches out to you. Than ask him what he feels for you because it can become annoying playing the guessing game and see if he does or doesn't.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    He could be playing around the field tbh. I mean if he's as attractive as you say he is and he's popular, there could be a chance he's talking to other girls as well and that is why he's giving you mixed signals. I would say that you should straight up ask him what he wants with you. You guys have been friends for a long time now and I think it would not be a huge deal if you asked him if he has any feelings towards you. 4 months is quite long to be talking, unless he just sees you as a best friend or something of that sort. But honestly, some guys don't know what they want either so he could be indecisive but you won't know unless you ask him. Take a break from talking to him to see if he reaches out to you. Than ask him what he feels for you because it can become annoying playing the guessing game and see if he does or doesn't.
    I feel like he is talking to other girls and I honestly want to ask him if he feels anything for me, I'm just nervous I'll make it awkward, I've told him today that I wont be talking as much lately and he said 'alright, okay, everything okay?' and i've just said everything is okay but i dislike social media and with things going on lately (in my life) i dont like it, so now im waiting on a response, and 4 months is ages to be talking, we've had such a history too and he's opened up to me so much too! i think whatever his reply will be, i might just say that i dont want him to think he cant talk to me anymore about personal stuff and if he ever needs me he can pull me aside at school (gives us an opportunity to talk in person) but in school he openly stares at me regardless of who catches him, its ridiculous, it makes me so confused
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by 999tigger)
    I read it all....


    Is this year 12?

    D any exams take a real break and see how you feel. he isnt going anywhere.

    If you want to go out after then just tell him you like him and suggest a few dates. he either says yes or no. If he comes up with reasons not to then he isnt that keen and tbh you can save yourself an awful lot of hassle by just ending it.

    If you want to carry on as you are, then thats up to you, but seems a lot of energy and not going anywhere.
    yeah we're in year 12 now and honestly, i think im always going to like him but i do realise he isnt good for me, i feel like i should move on personally plus he really gives me a bunch of hassle as you've mentioned AND now after dumping all of his personal problems on me, he goes and IGNORES ME??? when i asked a relevant question about maths as well, so ugh he just plays with my head and i cant be bothered with it anymore. Do you have any good ways of moving on?? and you are COMPLETELY right, i'm putting in so much energy into something that most likely isn't going to go anywhere
    • Very Important Poster
    Online

    19
    Very Important Poster
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yeah we're in year 12 now and honestly, i think im always going to like him but i do realise he isnt good for me, i feel like i should move on personally plus he really gives me a bunch of hassle as you've mentioned AND now after dumping all of his personal problems on me, he goes and IGNORES ME??? when i asked a relevant question about maths as well, so ugh he just plays with my head and i cant be bothered with it anymore. Do you have any good ways of moving on?? and you are COMPLETELY right, i'm putting in so much energy into something that most likely isn't going to go anywhere
    Live your life well. You are young and just getting used to all this relationship malarkey so it is oinly natural that it has ups and downs.

    You need to stop interacting with him and focus on yourself. he will find someone else, you will find someone else, maybe you will both g to uni and never speak to each other again....

    Keep busy and it fades after time. Hardly your lost love, when its only hassle and wasted energy thats involved, not something id be sad over...
 
 
 
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