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why can’t you always get over your fears watch

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    Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.

    But what happens if you face your fear over and over and something bad happens every time and it compounds and gets worse

    say you’re scared of public speaking and when you do it you might turn a bit red. so you face the fear more and you still turn a bit red. but now when you speak up you expect to turn red like you did the last time 20x you ‘faced your fears’ and spoke up

    so what happens now I faced it over and over assuming I’d be fine speaking up but now I feel worse cos might turn red has gone to will turn red
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    (Original post by papajohns)
    Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.

    But what happens if you face your fear over and over and something bad happens every time and it compounds and gets worse

    say you’re scared of public speaking and when you do it you might turn a bit red. so you face the fear more and you still turn a bit red. but now when you speak up you expect to turn red like you did the last time 20x you ‘faced your fears’ and spoke up

    so what happens now I faced it over and over assuming I’d be fine speaking up but now I feel worse cos might turn red has gone to will turn red
    All people have fears.

    Public speaking is a common one. I get nerbous about it, ut th difference is some people practice and push through so they get used to ir. Practice in front of a mirror.

    If you have general anxiety issues then go see your GP and ask for CBT therapy t deal with anxiety. They will give you methods and mental exercises so you can deal with situations better.

    You can also try Susan Jeffers- Feel the fear, but do it anyway book. Short and you can get it for a few pence on ebay or Amazon. there will be other books on public speaking if that is your only issue.

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/Feel-Fear-A...M7TFWJJ0B80TAX
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    Have a bit of whisky beforehand.
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    (Original post by papajohns)
    Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.

    But what happens if you face your fear over and over and something bad happens every time and it compounds and gets worse

    say you’re scared of public speaking and when you do it you might turn a bit red. so you face the fear more and you still turn a bit red. but now when you speak up you expect to turn red like you did the last time 20x you ‘faced your fears’ and spoke up

    so what happens now I faced it over and over assuming I’d be fine speaking up but now I feel worse cos might turn red has gone to will turn red
    I'm scared of public speaking. When I have to speak in front of the class in Sixth Form, I begin to stutter and go red as my classmates laugh at me. I also go red when a teacher asks me a question if front of the class relating to the work as I don't like being called out or picked on to answer a question as I worry that I'm going to give the wrong answer and everyone will laugh at me.
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    'Picked on' is an interesting choice of phrase. If you try to see being wrong as a necessary elementary step to being right, then it loses its power over you. Nobody ever got anywhere of note without being mistaken a few times.
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    (Original post by gjd800)
    'Picked on' is an interesting choice of phrase. If you try to see being wrong as a necessary elementary step to being right, then it loses its power over you. Nobody ever got anywhere of note without being mistaken a few times.
    I have done drama last year as a GCSE so I thought I would not be nervous when it comes to speaking in front of the class, but I just got even more nervous
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    (Original post by tiarichards16)
    I have done drama last year as a GCSE so I thought I would not be nervous when it comes to speaking in front of the class, but I just got even more nervous
    That's unusual. I spent my undergrad degree avoiding doing presentations etc, then I got a teaching job and sort of had to do it. It really was one of those where having to do it killed off the nerves, it doesn't bather me at all these days.

    hard as it might be, maybe you could benefit from putting yourself into positions where you need to speak in front of people?
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    (Original post by gjd800)
    That's unusual. I spent my undergrad degree avoiding doing presentations etc, then I got a teaching job and sort of had to do it. It really was one of those where having to do it killed off the nerves, it doesn't bather me at all these days.

    hard as it might be, maybe you could benefit from putting yourself into positions where you need to speak in front of people?
    Well I'm planning to do an apprenticeship in Forensic Science because I want to be a Crime Scene Investigator but I'm worked that maybe I have to present things in a room full of people.
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    (Original post by tiarichards16)
    Well I'm planning to do an apprenticeship in Forensic Science because I want to be a Crime Scene Investigator but I'm worked that maybe I have to present things in a room full of people.
    I think that it is a given that you will. You just need to find some sort of coping strategy until it gets to a point where you have built a little confidence. Confidence is the key here, I think!
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    (Original post by gjd800)
    I think that it is a given that you will. You just need to find some sort of coping strategy until it gets to a point where you have built a little confidence. Confidence is the key here, I think!
    I guess I'm going to have to build my confidence, otherwise I wont get my dream job
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    My face gets red and hot when I do public speaking... my voice shakes up a bit sometimes. But I laugh it off and keep speaking.
    I´ve taught a couple classes at uni and had some pretty embarrassing moments, but I laughed it off and kept going. We all have fears and get nervous some times, so if you´re worried about other people´s reactions, don´t. They most likely have been through it as well.

    Ps. If you´re shy about public speaking or interviews, go into the bathroom and jump or do a little dance minutes before starting. I swear it helps.
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    (Original post by gjd800)
    Have a bit of whisky beforehand.
    only a bit of whiskey drink the whole bottle and then youll get over your fear of flying. just jump off that house and youll soar though the air.
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    (Original post by rmutt)
    My face gets red and hot when I do public speaking... my voice shakes up a bit sometimes. But I laugh it off and keep speaking.
    I´ve taught a couple classes at uni and had some pretty embarrassing moments, but I laughed it off and kept going. We all have fears and get nervous some times, so if you´re worried about other people´s reactions, don´t. They most likely have been through it as well.

    Ps. If you´re shy about public speaking or interviews, go into the bathroom and jump or do a little dance minutes before starting. I swear it helps.
    You know what I might try that, I don't care if people walk into the bathroom at Sixth Form and I'm dancing coz I've done weirder s*** lol. Before I was drying my hands using the hand dryer (which is next to the bathroom door) and my mate was going to close the door on me so I put my foot on the door (while my hands were still in the hand dryer). Me and my mate couldn't stop creasing coz my leg was on a 90 degrees angle, she took a photo of it which whenever we look at the photo we start creasing. God I'm weird! Oh well 🤷*
 
 
 
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